


We're All The Same On The Inside

by Ravingkangaroo



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: ABSURD amounts of cursing, Before True Pacifist Route, Eventual Skeleton Smut, F/M, Frisk is briefly mentioned, Genocide Route references, Monsters playing ska music like total losers, Multi, Possible threesome with Sans and two humans??, Punk, Reader Is Not Frisk, Reader curses like a sailor, Reader has a skeleton phobia, Reader is a hooligan, Ska punk band, Spoilers - Pacifist Route, original punk characters, reader is female
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-05
Updated: 2016-11-22
Packaged: 2018-05-05 01:25:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 18
Words: 61,862
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5355773
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ravingkangaroo/pseuds/Ravingkangaroo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Reader is a young adult punk, trying to find her place in the world and dealing with financial and personal relationship struggles. Unable to face terrible news about her older brother, she flees to the mountains.</p><p>From there, well... she finds herself in a world of monsters. Some of them are very curious and intrigued by her rough way of living and approach on life. Their hopeful way of viewing things helps her cope with her own internal conflicts and eventually, prepares her to make her journey back to the surface. </p><p>Oh and her dirty mouth is going to get her in a lot of trouble, more ways than one.</p><p>This takes place in between many timeline resets. Frisk has come and gone several times, and this new human has just randomly dropped in now.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Kids Aren't Alright

**Author's Note:**

> I was a bit self-conscious to post this for a while, but here is yet another Undertale side story I've been working on.  
> I have definitely put a lot of my own personal life into this, and so I apologize if the language is a bit much for people.
> 
> I curse a lot. And so I sometimes write like I think and talk. And that can tend to make my writing gritty and raw. It adds to the attitude, I feel. Punk culture is very important to me, so I'll admit I get a little crazy with flaunting it.
> 
> I hope some of you can appreciate this.

_“~ Now the neighborhood's cracked and torn. ~ The kids are grown up but their lives are worn. ~ How can one little street. ~ Swallow so many lives. ~”_

Your foot bounced anxiously as you sit slumped forward on the couch. You hated playing the waiting game. Because, _fucking christ_ , it sucks. How were you suppose to sit still? And the music sure wasn’t helping… As much as you loved The Offspring, right now was not a good time for them.

You stood up and started pacing the room, unable to stay seated any longer. You were debating asking Josh to turn the music off. But maybe he was blaring it so loudly because it was helping him cope with the situation. _Be a nice roommate_ , you told yourself, _let him have his comfort_.

As you continued to pace, you saw that there was a stack of dirty dishes sitting on your clutter coffee table. Instantly, you snatched them up and took them to the kitchen. This would give you something to do in the meantime… You turn on the water and vigorously start scrubbing the dishes clean. _Calm down, calm the fuck down…_ But you can’t. It just wasn’t possible when your brother could have been shot… he could be dead. And you just didn’t know. And now you had to wait to hear if he was alright. Goddamnit, where was Andrew?!

As if a mysterious force heard the plea inside your head, you hear the door bang open. Instantly, you drop the dishes in your hands, ignoring the loud clatter of ceramic in the sink or the fact that the water was still running. You are at the door in nearly two seconds. Andrew is there, looking awfully startled that you were on him even before he could close the door behind him.

“Well??” You demand, your voice shaking.

Andrew looks down, shrugging. He looks calm but he seems to be compressing a lot of the pain that you can see on his face. “Dunno, dude… I got a call from their platoon but they have no new information to report. Jack is still MIA.”

You fumble with your patch vest, trying to pull out your cell from its pocket. Cursing at how badly your fingers are shaking you try to pull up your contacts to call Will. He’s the only other military connection you have in your circle of friends… maybe he could give you more information… because you were convinced that the marines were holding details back from you. They _had_ to be.

Andrew approached you, resting a hand on your upper arm. “Hey, hey… calm down, man. It’s going to be okay…”

You look over at him fiercely, glaring daggers into his eyes. For a brief moment you look at him… really look at him. The way he kept his mohawk slack, the torn up flannel under the patch vest, the dirty boots… this guy was a hot piece of work in your book, normally. The kind of guy that made your ovaries scream. But right now, his words have sent you into an angry fit. “How the fuck can you say that? You don’t know that its going to be okay.”

The Offspring music stops abruptly in the background.

Andrew flinched away from your salty attack. A look of guilt flashed over his face before he tentatively tried again. “Yeah, but c’mon, we also don’t know for sure he’s hurt or anything… We gotta just keep our hopes up. This is Jack we’re talking about… the guy is known for getting into dicey situations, but he’s One Man Show, he always finds a way out.”

A smile tries to creep up your mouth for a moment. Ah, yes… One Man Show. A nickname that he truly earned over the years. Your bro was great at getting the spotlight, even if it was the wrong crowd. And, yes, he was also pretty crafty at using his charisma to get out of a tight situation. But **this** has never happened before. Not in all the years he had served in the Marines has an accident like this come up. And that’s why you were literally freaking the fuck out.

 **Fuck, Fuck, FUCK!** You drop your phone and curse wildly at yourself. Why won’t your goddamn hands stop shaking?

At this point, Josh has come in to check in with his two roommates. You don’t even have to see that he’s there, the creaking wooden floors under his dense mass gives him away. You glance up, a bit embarrassed that he’s seeing you losing your cool. 

“Hey, what’s up..?” You can tell he’s trying to take this situation nonchalantly, but it only pisses you off more.

“No word about Jack….” Andrew sighs.

“I’m gonna call Will.” You finally say, recovering your phone in your hands. The number is dialing… 

…

…

But no one picked up.

You bite down on your lip. This fucked up situation feels so helpless. 

“What is there left to do?!” You declare, throwing up your arms impatiently. “I can’t sit around here and wait; it’s driving me nuts!” With that, you march out of the entrance hall way.

You don’t care if your roommates are giving you a worried look, you have the right to be on your last nerve. Your brother is out there and something really horrible could have happened to him. So you would freak out all the fuck you want, thank you. You yank the scarf hanging up on your coat rack off as you pass it and stride into the bathroom, slamming it shut behind you.

_I’m gonna piss and get the fuck outta here… I’ll go for a walk or something… shit, I dunno…_

“Dude?” Andrew’s voice can be heard behind the bathroom door.

“Go away, I’m pissing.” You snarl. You hate talking to people through doors on the toilet… its awkward.

“Okay, man… it's just you are worrying me and Josh.”

You huff dramatically. “It’s Jack you should be worrying about, not me!”

“I know, and I am. Believe me. The dude is our good friend and we want him to be okay. But freaking out isn’t gonna help, man…”

You flush the toilet with such force, the handle almost seems to give under the pressure of your boot knocking it down. You start scrubbing your hands viciously, feeling anger bubble in your gut. Quickly, you glance up in the dirty mirror and ruffle your mangy mohawk around a bit. Your dark eyes narrow for a sec before you turn and thrust the door open. “Andrew, I can’t help it. I’m worried about my brother! So sorry if I have no fucking self control right now.”

You storm passed both Josh and him, briefly noticing Josh was doing his normal thing of stroking is long, ginger beard; a nervous tick he did under stressful situations. Whatever, you don’t care right now, you are aiming for the door. You want out of this house.

You stop in your tracks with a jolt when Andrew grabs ahold of your arm. He is glaring at you seriously now. “Hey, dude. C’mon. You aren’t going out there alone like this.”

“I just want out of the house for a lil while, okay?” His confidence has already starting to whittle down your temper. Damn, he had such a strange power over you…

“Well then we’ll go somewhere. I’ll drive.” He offers, pulling his keys out of the back of his jean pockets.

You hesitate, still fuming a bit. Part of you just wants to be alone. But hell, that usually never ends well, knowing your history. Panic attacks and anxiety prayed on you when you were away from the herd… 

“Okay.” You say in a low voice.

Josh looks from Andrew to you and back. You see in his face that he’s trying to decide if he should join, but then you see him make up his mind when he looks down at the fact that he is only in slacks, socks and a black jacket full of holes. “I guess I’ll wait here, in case someone comes by.” He says, slinking back into his room. Shortly after, the music comes back, shaking the floor with its massive volume. Andrew pats you on the back. “Let’s go.” 

You both step out into the cool, autumn night. The biting breeze makes you shudder for a second.

Andrew unlocks the car doors and hops into the drivers seat. You smirk a bit to yourself, seeing him adjust the the seat again so he can see. _What a shorty._ But you were one to talk, being practically the same height. As you climb into the passenger seat, Andrew turns to you with the softest expression you’ve seen on his face in weeks. “Hey..” He says gently. This was the side of him only you got to see; when it was just the two of you. 

“Hey.” You sigh back, almost weakly.

“You alright?” He asks, and you know he’s asking deeper than just the worries of Jack.

“Heh… ‘course not.” You say, not meeting his gaze this time.

“C’mere…” He whispers, almost in a cooing tone. You turn to him just as he reaches out and brushes the sides of your cheeks with his fingers. He starts to pull you toward him, and instinctually, you lean forward to embrace him in a long kiss. Before pulling away, he gives a soft nip to your lower lip and another sigh escapes your lips. After seeing the look of frustration melt away from your face, he grins at you. 

“It’s gonna be alright. I am confident in Jack.” Andrew then starts the car, still looking you over carefully.

You shrug a bit, not wanting to fully agree with him, but part of you knows that Andrew has a hunch about these things most of the time. He was able to predict if something would turn out alright. It’s a weird six sense of his… much like how he also got weird chills through his body when he knew something bad would happen. Hence the nickname your circle of friends gave him; Captain Shivers.

“Hey, I got an idea.” Andrew says, changing the subject as the car starts moving down the street. “Why don’t we all go camping sometime? Like next week? It could be a big Hoodrat road trip.” He grins stupidly. It’s kinda cute.

“All of us? You want to take everyone?” You ask, sorta smiling at the idea. It’s been ages since the whole group did something big together.

“Sure, why not? We’ll just have to car pool. We can take my car, and Nolan’s and Will’s. Should be enough space. Maybe we’ll take Josh’s… but that car is scary to drive.”

“Haha, yeah.” You chuckle. When was he ever going to put more steering fluid in that fucking thing? “But where do you wanna go?”

Andrew falls silent for a moment as the car leaves the neighborhood. He’s focusing on the road but also thinking. “Ah, how about that sight over in the mountains?”

“Oh, you mean Mt. Ebott? Oh yeah, I’ve been wanting to check it out for a while now.” Nature was fucking awesome. There was never a bad time to go have a good ol’ fashion adventure in the outdoors. And the rumors and ghost stories that you heard about the place… did they scare you? Fuck no, if anything, that kind of shit attracted you and your group of friends. It was exciting.

“Hey, could we drive there tonight?” You ask, a smile creeping up your face.

“Ah, c’mon man, nah… that’d be almost a 2 hour drive. Let’s save it for later, and we can bring everyone else.”

You pout a bit, but nod. Would be a long trip to start at night…

Andrew suddenly pulls over and you glance out the window to see where he brought you. The park. And not just any park, but the place in which many shenanigans and hood-rattery have taken place among you and your friends. This park has been through a lot of your group’s mischief… once you guys spray painted stupid messages up on the building’s roof (which lasted up there for ages before someone noticed it), then a few times you had drunken games of leap frog on the playscape. To top it off both Jack and Nolan got plastered one night and urinated down the slides. Together. Side by side. Laughing like a bunch of lunatics. You and your friends never touched those slides again. They were forever tainted by One Man Show and Ruckus (respectfully, Nolan’s nickname). Luckily, this park was so out of the way and in a poor-college student neighborhood that the cops usually wouldn’t bother you here. So your friends and you could be the hooligans that you truly were with out a care in the world.

Andrew got out of the car, and you joined him in crossing the street to escape out of the streetlights and into the protection of the dark trees in the park. You both walked passed the playscape and went straight for the hilltop. A good choice. Chill moments were had up there. He sat down on the patch of grass and patted it next to him. You sat down. 

“Feel any better?” He asked.

“A lil.” You admit. He really had this unexplainable way of getting you to calm down.

“Yeah, good. I bet we’ll hear some good news in a few and we won’t have to worry anymore.” He says leaning his shoulder against you.

“I fucking hope so.” You say, looking down.

He looks at you for a moment. “Would this help at all?” He gives your neck a soft nip.

You giggle a bit. It tickles. “Heh.” You can’t help but smile.

“Sorry, I don’t mean to shrug off your feelings.” He says tentatively.

“I know, man, I know. You know how I work.” You give him a playful grin. He really does. Sexy teasing really did help you take your mind off of shit. And you loved it. Especially when he did it to you. God, you craved that mischievous toying…

“Hey, Andrew.” You start, a thought coming to mind. “Why are we still hiding this from the rest of the group?”

He gives you a hesitant look. 

“You know, _this_. What we’re doing. Fooling around and what not.” You add.

“Well, guess its cuz we aren’t dating anymore. We haven’t for a while now.” He says quietly.

“Yeah. But we broke up cuz I was going to school in another state. Now I’m back. Why do we gotta hide it still? Everyone already knows we still have a thing going.”

Andrew looks a bit uncomfortable. _Here we go again…_

There was a part of you that already knew what he was gonna say. He was scared to commit again. Not because he didn’t like you. He _definitely_ liked you. A lot. You’re probably the only person he’s fully opened up to. It was more this complicated matter that he wasn’t sure if he’d be sticking around this town for much longer. He was studying to be an Anthropologist. And that meant he needed to travel to other countries to study different people and cultures. Plus, you just moved back here but who knows if your career path carried you away again?

“I just don’t want us to get attached to the idea and then we get split apart again…” He mumbles.

You nod slowly. You hate the idea too. And those possibilities were too high. You swallow hard. Yet another awful fucking thing you don’t want to be thinking about right now…

“Forget about it.” You say, waving your hand in front of your face. “It’s dumb I said it.”

“Nah, it’s not dumb. But it does worry me that you bring it up a lot.” He’s searching for your eyes, but you refuse to look back at him; you don’t want him to read your thoughts. “It’s almost like you are already getting attached again. I don’t wanna hurt you again.”

“You aren’t gonna hurt me again.” You finally say, giving him a confident wink. It’s the best you can fake. “No matter what, we’d promise we’d stay friends. Cuz you’re the bestest friend I’ve ever had, and I’m not gonna loose that cuz of some petty emotions.”

He sighs, watching you carefully to see if he can take your word. He then nods, accepting it as truth for now.

You rest your head down on his shoulder and let yourself go limp. “Thanks for taking me out of the house, man.”

“No problem, mango.” Mango… Mang… Man…. they were all the same term.

He wraps an arm around you and stares up at the cloudy sky. “Let’s just hope they get us that good news soon.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Edit: I suck at naming chapter titles... I really hate giving titles to anything, honestly. But since this is a punk rock themed story, I'm just gonna name all the chapter titles after punk, grunge and other fun rock songs.
> 
> This Chapter is The Kids Aren't Alright by the Offspring. Should have be obvious for that one since the lyrics show up in the chapter anyway :P


	2. I Don't Wanna Hear It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alright, you've gone through the introduction of these characters (mostly), now time to set the scene for Mt. Ebbot.  
> \--  
> Lots of drinking and smoking and cursing (and mention of drug use) in this chapter, you've been warned.

“Alright, we got the toilet paper, drain-o, twelve pack o’ beer, hamburger meat, cheese and buns…” Andrew says, glancing over the grocery list on his phone. “Do we need anything else?”

He looks over at Josh, who was pushing the shopping cart along. The big dude starts looking over everything, shifting things around and thinking to himself… “Uhhhhh…”

“Ketchup!” You come bounding over to them from the other side of the isle. With a dramatic sweep, you skid by them and dunk the bottle of tomato goodness into the cart. It almost busts open, and the thought if it had makes you laugh a little.

“Niiiice.” Josh says with a big, doofy grin. “That’s right, we’ve been out for a while now…”

“Yeh, man. And I gotta have me some spicy ketchup on my burger tonight.” You exclaim. Spicy ketchup was the way to go. Either that, or _nope_.

“Sweet, I guess we’re ready to checkout, mangos.” Andrew says leading the group down to the front.

“So what’s this party for anyway?” You ask casually, thrusting your hands into your pockets.

“Dude, it’s Halloween.” Josh says, giving you a friendly nudge with his elbow. “Well, tomorrow is Halloween… but no one can afford to get drunk on a Sunday night.”

Oh yeah… It’s that time of year again. Just as you all discuss this, you notice you are starting to pass the cheesy Halloween decorations and candy on the left. You scoff at them, noticing how cheaply made they seem to get each year. What a waste of money, effort and human slavery in… what…. were all these plastic props made in China too? That’s fucked…

Andrew grins stupidly and you already know what’s on his mind. His grabby hands reach out and pick up a plastic skeleton that’s a third of the size of a real one. He turns to you, a mischievous look on his face. “Oooh, look, dude! Spoooopy skeletons. You like the spoopy skeletons, don’tcha?” He starts gesturing the skeleton towards you, as if it were a puppet that was bounding to you in frolicking leaps. 

You narrow your eyes. “Har har…” You laugh unenthusiastically. Then the thing gets too close to your face and, immediately, you slap the plastic toy out of his hands. “Oh HELL no.” Then you laugh, as if it was nothing. But deep down, your mind still squirms a bit. Hey, it’s not your fault. You’ve had an irrational fear of skeletons since you were in Kindergarten (or some time around then)… Happened one year on Halloween; a childhood friend of your’s had you over and their douchey older brother was suppose to be babysitting you both. Instead, the asshole thought it would be funny to lock you up in the closet with a realistic skeleton… the kind of ones you see in science classrooms. Realistic as hell. That traumatized the shit out of you. He wouldn’t let you out for nearly 20 minutes. By that point, you had soiled yourself. You wouldn’t dare go near a skeleton without turning into a sniveling mess for several years on. At least you were much better now. You could look at a skeleton, even stand near one…. but you still felt uncomfortable. The fear still lingered in the back of your head. Your friends tried to be understanding, but the jerks also found it highly amusing, especially since it was a little silly. After all, _you_ had a skeleton inside you. You tried not to think about this much…

“Ahhhh… can’t handle the spoop.” Andrew giggles like a kid and scoops the skeleton toy off the ground. He tosses it back on the shelf and you immediately relax. 

“Can’t help it man. Don’t like ‘em still….” You sigh, smirking at him. He teased you too much.

“Alright, alright, children…” Josh says, grinning and patting you both on the backs. “Let us make haste, our fellow rats are waiting on us to bring the food.”

You all make your way to the front where the checkout counter awaits. While in line, you frown a bit to yourself. “Yo, I don’t even have a costume to wear… were we suppose to dress up or something?”

Andrew shrugs. “Yah, I don’t really have anything either. I don’t think it matters, people will understand. We’ve been busy working.”

True that.

You and Andrew both hand your share of contribution to Josh in the form of a few bills, while he pays for the groceries with a debit card. The cashier makes a face at you all, which you don’t pay much attention to. So what if you were all wearing ratty-ass clothes covered in holes and offensive patches. That’s what you liked. So fuck them.

“Let’s gooooo.” Josh declares out of the blue, his arms full of grocery bags as he rushes out the exit.

“Hey, wait up, man!” Andrew shouts, running after him. You shrug, and follow after. The commotion you hooligans make causes the security guard sitting at the front entrance to shout impatiently for you ‘damn kids to stop running in the store.’ But why, you are all leaving anyway?! Whatever.

…

Okay, you’ll admit it. You’ve been in a weird funk today. Been kinda rude to people, which is what most strangers expected from a punk-ass kid like you. But really, you weren’t. You genially liked being super friendly to people and seeing their reactions of surprise. But today, no. You were feeling rather salty towards people. Even towards your friends too. And it definitely wasn’t helping being at this party.

For one, Jack wasn’t there. This reminded you that you still haven’t heard anything about him today. That alone was enough to make you anxious again. And two, it seemed everyone else had the same thought on their mind. Everyone’s conversation at the party felt either really forced or awkward… because… let’s face it; a hood rat party wasn’t a hood rat party without One Man Show. He was usually the frontline entertainment at any gathering that involved drinking. And the lack of his presence felt very wrong and unsettling to all of you. For two hours, you tried to ignore this. But it was getting harder… even drowning yourself in stouts and IPAs was doing shit for your nerves. _Fuck._

“Yoohoooo.” Cat practically sings to you from the kitchen. You perk up a bit and glance in to see her finish serving the last burger on a plate. “Thanks so much again for providing the meat.” She gives you a big grin. You take a moment to admire her adorable Princess Mononoke costume she put together. The mask that’s propped up on top of her head looks almost identical to the one in the movie. Good job, Kitty Cat. You attempt to match her affection with your own smile, but it probably looks forced. “No problem, dude.” At least she seemed to be doing a swell job at ignoring this issue. Cat was always a good hostess. It was so nice of her and Nolan both to have people over in their tiny town house for the party. But tonight, it felt smaller than usual. You couldn’t keep still or calm. You really just wanted to hear that someone found Jack and he was alright. Then you could enjoy yourself.

You felt an arm wrap around your shoulders and you are suddenly engulfed in a big, bear hug. 

“Ohhhmf… hi Josh.” You glance up at your roommate through squished cheeks. The big guy is already buzzed. You can tell because the dude blushes pretty bad when the alcohol hits his system. “Hey, buddyyyy. Cheer up. We’re at a party!” You can tell he’s just being a good friend… a rather drunk friend, but you feel worse that he’s able to see that you are stewing in your own worries. You give him a pat on the arm. “I’m doing’ alright.” 

He releases you and gives you soft pats on your back, then stumbles off to watch some of the other hood rats duking it out on Smash bros.

“Yo man. Haven’t seen you in a while, what’s up?” Vitalik strolls up to you, a PBR in one hand and an unlit cigarette in the other.

“Hey, dude… not much. You?” You smirk a bit. Vitalik seems a bit toasty too. The dude also always looked perpetually stoned… with his squinty eyes and friendly grin, you thought to yourself. But you were pretty sure he didn’t smoke all the time… maybe… _dunno_.

“I’ve been good. Finally got my own place. What’ve you been up to?”

“Eh… trying to get a job that pays better. Been stuck at the same retail place since I moved back.” You feel your stomach twist a bit. As much as you don’t wanna start discussing your current and future financial states, you hate to be rude to your friend. Vitalik didn’t get to hang with the rest of the Hoodrats as much anymore. The guy worked a _whole_ lot.

“Yeah, yeah… I hear ya. Hey, Nolan and I were gonna smoke a bit, wanna join us?”

“Sure…” Maybe a little tobacco would chill you the fuck down.

You make a quick glance around the small living room before following him out back. Didn’t seen Andrew anywhere… maybe he was out front with Eavon and Jessie. On your way out, you grab your bag and sling it over your shoulder. You're sure you have a lighter in there somewhere you can fish out.

Nolan was already sitting outside, hunched over on the bench on the back patio. He grins up at you when you step outside. “Wasssuuuup.”

“Hey, dude. Didn’t realize you started smoking again.”

“Yeah, well, you know. Trying to get through grad school for fucking Mathematics has finally made me give up and go back to my toxic addictions.” He lets out a loud, dramatic laugh and runs his large hands through his messy brown hair.  

“Fair enough.” You comment. “No worries, I’m sure you could try quitting again once you finish school.”

“We’ll see.” He groans, shoving the death stick in his mouth and inhaling deeply. Vitalik offers you your own and you take it gratefully. You start to poke around in the many pockets on your bag for your lighter. Nolan blows the smoke out before turning back to you. “So how’s living with Andrew and Josh? It’s been, what… 6 months since you’ve moved back here?”

“Yeh, and it’s been good. They’re great.” You smile and you’re worried its almost a grimace. Time to light this cig cuz you really needed to get on their level. But where is your goddamn lighter?

Nolan gives you a snarky grin, handing you a lighter next to him. “You and Andrew a thing again, yet?”

You roll your eyes and shrug. You take his lighter. “It’s still basically the same since you last asked.” You fumble to light your cigarette in your mouth. You really didn’t want to be discussing this either…

“Ah, I’m sure its only a matter of time. You munchkins are joined at the hip.” Vitalik adds in, puffing on his cigarette.

“I guess…” Ugggh, gotta think of a way to change the subject. “Uh, Vitalk how’s yer job going at the factory?”

“Ah it’s doing good-“ You try to listen but you notice your hands are shaking. You nod when he pauses in his story, but the loud beating of your heart rate deafens your ears. Why the fuck wasn’t the cigarette helping… You take a long drag on it. Breathe. Another drag. Breathe. 

Nope, you are still shaking.

“-plus she’s pretty cute. I think I’ll ask her out sometime.”

“Sorry, what?” You flush a bit, the subject had already dramatically changed and you weren’t able to keep up.

Vitalik grins but taps your arm. “Ah, you alright there?”

“Yeah, yeah. So this girl, where’d you meet her?” You ask, trying to look casual.

“My work, like I just said.” He’s eyeing you now.

 _Shit._ This conversation was challenging you quite a bit for some fucking reason.

Nolan and Vitalik are giving you confused looks now, and you really don’t want attention focused on you. But now you are out of ideas for another conversation changer. Plus, that’d probably look too desperate and obvious at this point… You shift uncomfortably from your left foot to your right, the silence killing you a little on the inside. Finally, Vitalik spares you of any more embarrassment as he turns to Nolan. “How you and Cat doing?”

“We’re great. Both of us are busy as shit, but we’re making do. Just yesterday we-“

Their voices are muffled out. You can’t focus on them at all, because you are now fixated on the people in the living room. The big, open window out on the back lets you see everything:

Andrew steps into the house looking distraught…. like, REALLY distraught. You haven’t seen him look that upset in a long time. He’s saying something to Josh. Josh’s happy face falls so quickly to a pale look of shock, you think you are going to throw up. They are discussing something. Something bad. _Oh god…_

Nolan’s lighter slips out of your hand and hits the pavement.

“Hey, man…” Nolan says to you. “What’s wrong?” 

Tears are falling down your face.

Cat and Jessie are now standing around Andrew and Josh. Andrew covers his face, and Josh is relaying what Andrew just said to them. Now they look upset.

_Oh god, no…._

Andrew is walking back out the front door, Josh wrapping an arm around him. Cat turns to look to the backyard and her teary eyes meet yours. They tell you everything.

It’s everything you never wanted.

“Hey, man, seriously, what’s-“ Nolan starts. But you don’t let him finish. Your feet guide you into a fast sprint. You are over the backyard’s fence and into the street in a matter of seconds. You are running as if your life depended on it. Maybe it did. Running was going to keep you alive. It was going to get you away. It was going to keep you from hearing it.

As you make it passed the front of the house and towards the main street, you are pretty sure you hear Andrew’s voice calling after you. It almost pulls you back… because you can’t stand it when you hear pain in his voice. And his cries of your name was full of it. But you can’t stop. If you hear anyone tell you the bad news, you wouldn’t be able to handle it.

Fuck this. **FUCK THIS.**

You are still sprinting, towards the busier streets and out of the neighborhood. You don’t look back to see if anyone is following you. You could out run them right now, goddamnit. 

_Jack. My brother._

The salt in your eyes burns like crazy as your feet guide you on. That motherfucker promised…. he promised he’d come back. He was gonna help you find a better job. He was gonna help you find a way to stay in town. He was going to help keep Andrew in town too. He was what held this group together.

_And now…_

Don’t fucking say it. Don’t think it.

“I gotta…” You cry loudly to no one in particular. “I gotta go somewhere!”

Somewhere. Anywhere. Very far away.

_I’m not able to deal with this right now._

 

_…_

 

 

The ticket in your hand had become a crumbled up mess in your clenched hand. You hadn’t let it go the moment the lady handed it to you at the booth. She had hesitated to give it to you, looking into your miserable face. You particularly didn’t care if snot and tears were streaming down your flushed face. _Just give me my damn bus pass, already._

The bus was bumpy and loud. A kid was screaming in the back somewhere. A man to your right wouldn’t stop coughing a gross, wet cough. Sounded contagious. The older lady was snoring loudly next to you. You couldn’t stop glaring at the ugly cloth pattern that was stitched to the back of the seat in front of you. _What an unattractive piece of fabric._

The chaotic white noise around you felt amplified in your head. It felt like it was killing you. You so badly wanted to scream. You would scream the moment you go off this fucking bus, you promised yourself.

What felt like hours, the bus finally stopped in the middle of nowhere, north of town. You hurried off, and was greeted by the chilly winds of an autumn evening. The bus doors closed behind you and you stood there, glaring into the dark trees of a forest through blood-shot eyes. The bus drove away…

All fell still. Then a cricket chirped nearby.

“AUUUUUUUUHHH FUCKING FUCK THE FUCKING SHIT GOD DAMNIT FUCK-“

You screamed and cursed until your throat must have started to bleed. It felt good. It made you feel a little better on the inside. After getting that out of your system, you sat there in the road, huffing for a long while and collecting your bearings. The bag on your back felt a little heavy all of a sudden. You shrugged it off and looked around again. It was definitely late and you were at the Mt. Ebott sight. You looked behind you. The bus station sat there looking rather lonely surrounded by the wilderness. A man sat on the bench under the blaring lights. He probably thought you were crazy. From how far away he was, you couldn’t even tell if he was awake or asleep; he just looked like a blobby shape, sloped way back in his seat. Whatever…

Why the fuck had you come here? Your gut had guided you here on pure desperation to be far from your own reality. Coming here yesterday had sounded amazing…. but that was with the idea that Andrew would have been with you. Now you were here alone… and all you had in your bag was a wallet with only 17 bucks in your name, two beers, a black hoodie, a ruined bus pass, a pair of headphones that barely worked and a cell phone at 40 percent battery. You had turned that off a few hours ago, not really in the mood to talk to anyone. Maybe coming out here alone and emotional was a bad idea. Too late now. Might as well clear your head (and get your money’s worth) by strolling around the mountain side. Surprisingly for how late it was and how much you’ve travelled, you were wide awake. It was incredible what stress and adrenaline did to a person.

You settled your bag back on your shoulders and started to make your way up the road towards the mountain. Once your eyes adjusted to the darkness, it was easier to see the outlines of the trees and the plants growing along the side of the path. All the flowers were shriveled up this time of the year. Would have been too dark right now to enjoy them anyway…

A gust of cold air sweeps past you and you shiver involuntarily. Fuck, it’s colder out here. You take a moment to dig out the hoodie in your bag and you slip it on under your patch vest. Much better. You hike on.

The walk up the mountain is a work out, but you find your mind is able to blank out and go on autopilot. It’s a lot more bearable than feeling anything right now. This is just what you needed. Quite, spacious, nothingness.

A loud snap of a branch wakes you up and you look around wildly. It’s probably just a critter lurking about. But you decide not to stick around. You continue up the road in a slow jog. As you make some distance between you and whatever made that noise, you start to wonder how early in the morning it was gonna be by the time you made it back. Were you gonna be able to make it back in the morning? You hadn’t looked at your bus ticket to see when the next bus was coming around this area. It couldn’t be very frequent, this was so out of the way from most other stops. You supposed you could always call someone… but then guilt hit you hard. You’d rather just get back home your own way…

You gasp as you suddenly realize how high up you’ve traveled. Panting a bit, you look back and can see the dim glow of the town behind you. The mountain side view is stunning. Now you wish you could see it during the day… and with some friends. You glance up at the night sky, feeling a bit disappointed. And if only it was a clear night tonight, too…. it’s been cloudy all week. The stars probably looked amazing out here. Oh well.

You sit down on a boulder and pull out your phone. A light would be handy right now… you turn it back on and it immediately blows up with voicemails. Swallowing hard, you ignore them for now. _Just deal with it later…_ You turn on the flashlight app and scan the area. The vegetation is much thicker this far up the mountain. You wonder if you’ll see a fox or a rabbit around here…

A glint of yellow catches your eye. You focus your light on a ledge off in the distance. It was several feet away. _What was that?_

It definitely wasn’t an animal… it remained perfectly still, even with a bright light shining on it. You stand up, adjusting the bag on your shoulders and start to walk off the path towards the colorful object. The light casted brilliant shadows on the trees and rock features as you drew nearer to the ledge. A breeze drifted through and the yellow thing swayed gently. A smile crept up your face. _It’s a flower._ Guess the coming of winter hadn’t gotten this lil’ guy yet. You come closer, holding the light steady. You reach out your hand to see if you can grab it. Hey, it was gonna die in a few weeks soon anyway. Might as well take a little momento of your visit here- 

Your foot slips. Suddenly you are plummeting. You hadn’t seen the giant, gaping hole in front of you as you attempted to make it to the little flower up above.

You're falling. But not for very long. You don’t even have enough time to let out a scream. Before you can register much, as the wind rapidly rushes passed your face and body, the earth greets you with an unfriendly **_crunch_.**

Bones have shattered. An awful pain floods you. _God, it hurts._  

It’s very dark. And it only seems to grow darker. Consciousness slips away from your grasp, and you welcome it to snuff out the pain all around you.

 ...

...

..

.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Edit: I suck at naming chapter titles... I really hate giving titles to anything, honestly. But since this is a punk rock themed story, I'm just gonna name all the chapter titles after punk, grunge and other fun rock songs.
> 
> This Chapter is I Don't Wanna Hear It by Minor Threat.


	3. The World Has Turned And Left Me Here

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I adore Toriel... but if she were to meet someone like me, she'd probably be very bothered by my choice of appearance and words.  
> But she is still a caring goat mom, no matter how odd you may be to her. c:
> 
> I'm also gonna be experimenting with the way I format the dialogue. Giving Toriel the * symbol in front of her words, to make it feel like the game. ;P

Your body sinks into a large, soft bed. Nice and cozy. Just a cool enough temperature in the air around you so that you aren’t burning hot being under so many blankets. You role over, groaning a bit. _Don’t wanna get up for work today… just wanna sleep… so tired._ As you role over onto your side, a sharp pain shoots through the arm pinned by your body and the bed. You jolt up in a sitting position, eyes wide open.

_Oh yeah._

_I was on the mountain side. I fell. Wait…_

_Where the FUCK am I?_

Eyes darting around in a panic, you realize you are in an unfamiliar room. This room is huge. _Really_ huge. You’d guess a giant lives here… or maybe the contrast of the large resident to your tiny-ass self was making it seem all the more dramatic. _Still…_

You look down at your feet under the blankets… they only reach about half way to the middle of the bed. There was still several inches (maybe even feet) to the base of the bed frame. Whoa.

Looking back up, all the other furniture in the room were also equally gigantic. That desk next to the bed was huge… the chair to it was huge… even the book resting open on the desk looked way too big to be normal sized. Glancing behind you, the bookshelf full of more outrageously sized books towered above you. And that goddamn cactus looking plant in the corner was uncomfortably large, too. _Why… How….?_

Reaching to pull the blankets off yourself, you stop and curse madly. Your arms hurt like hell. What happened? When you look at your arms to investigate, you see several scars all down them. Very irregular… and they have distorted the tattoos on your left arm you just got a few months ago. You let out a hiss of frustration. _Dammit._ Those tattoos had been a huge investment. 

So what the hell had happened? Were you dead? Was this your brain putting you in a random scenario as it slowly began to loose oxygen?

_It felt too real though…_

The moment you considered how real everything looked and felt around you, a delicious smell came to your nose. It smelled sweet… and… cinnamony. Your stomach let out a desperate moan. _Fucking shit_ , you were hungry! You must have been asleep for a long while.

Well, looking at this scenario as a whole… if you were dead, it didn’t matter what you ran into outside this room. And if you weren’t… whom ever brought you here had a higher chance of being friendly if they had taken you in and tucked you into their bed. 

You struggle out of bed, wincing at how sore your whole body was. Never in your life have you felt this achy. Not even after a month of volunteer digging on an archeology site…. not even after working your job restocking and lifting pounds of paper day in and day out (for a whole week)…. not even after being fucked from behind, on top and down below for 6 hours straight…. _this_ has broken your record. _Guess the fall really did a number on you…_

Coming up to the door, you awkwardly have to reach up a bit to grab the doorknob. _Goddamn, even this door is ridiculously big…_ You peek your head out into the hallway and your noise is hit with a powerful blast of that yummy smelling cinnamon. Smelled like someone was baking a pastry of some sort. The hall way looks so neat and clean… but still rather huge in the scale of a normal person’s house. You creep out, shifting your gaze around… The house is way too quiet and it sets you on edge. Even though you feel like you are not dead and that this was all real… there was definitely something off-putting about this place… aside form the fact that the scale of things were way wonky, it was something else… the fact that you happened to end up here after falling into a hole in the mountain. Was this place particularly close to where you had your accident? And why were you here and not in a hospital?

You tiptoe down the hallway further and come into a grand entrance to the house. There is a large wooden door to your left that seems to lead out of the house… _Good, incase you need to make a run for it, you knew where the exit was._ To the right was a large staircase spiraling down a floor below you… maybe to a basement? And straight ahead, you could see a dinning room set up. 

You gulp. Maybe whoever lives here is in there? That’s where the smell was coming from… that wonderful, inviting smell of food…

You walk forward. The dinning room is open up to a sitting area to the right. A brilliant fireplace is lit and producing a pleasant warmth. The chair next to the fireplace is rather large (as expected), you note. Taking a closer look, it looks like white fur was stuck to it. Someone had attempted to clean the hair off, but it was the kind of thick fur that you couldn’t completely get rid of. 

So they had a dog? Or a cat? 

You spot a pile of fur that had been swept neatly in the corner of the room, too. That was a lot of fur… 

So… a rather… big dog?

The smell of cinnamon is much stronger now and your stomach lets out another angry groan. You look down, patting it gently. _Patience, yo… gotta make sure this place is safe before we eat._

You look back up and suddenly your eyes do a double take to the kitchen. You just saw someone walk passed your field of vision before disappearing around the corner. And they were definitely huge like you anticipated, but… they were so pale… almost white. No, maybe they were actual the color white. And…. 

You shake your head. No, they definitely did not have long ears…. and horns. _Are you crazy?_

The person in question appeared to not have noticed you standing there. They were busily (and quietly) working on something in the kitchen. You could now hear a soft crackling of flames that were contrastingly different from the ones in the fireplace. Their foot falls sounded very dense but also had a muffled padding to them. You hadn’t looked at their feet to see if they were wearing shoes… maybe they were just barefoot.

Deciding it would be best to announce your presence with a good amount of distance between you and this stranger, you remain in the dinning area and clear your throat loudly. It’s a very unattractive sound… you sound congested as hell.

The flames from the kitchen muffle out and there is a pause. Then you hear the padded feet walking towards the doorway.

It was completely involuntary; you let out a soft gasp as this person finally stands before you. Those were _definitely_ long ears… and those were _definitely_ horns on their head. And the white fur…? It was their fur…. not a dog’s.

A woman they appeared to be, looming tall in the doorway. She was… very animalistic. Not in how she held herself or behaved… but quite literally because her body appeared to be covered head to foot in thick fur. She bore a snout like face and doey eyes. Long floppy ears drooped from the top of her head to her shoulders. The horns on her head were slightly curved and even looked like they had been awkwardly filed down to take length off of them. _Or to dull them…_

She was smiling at you in a very hesitant and patient sort of way. Even though she was two, no, three times your size, there was a grace to her from how she stood. Perhaps it was her anatomy. You couldn’t quite tell how her body was built through the long, draping purple dress she wore, but her feet did appear to have several more joints and appendages that you lacked.

“* _Ahem…_ ” Her voice was amazingly soft and quite in contrast to her size and build.

You shook your head and flush a bit. She was staring at you awkwardly now. Of course, because you were gawking rather rudely at her. But, could she blame you? You’ve never quite seen someone like her before…

_Okay, now you were starting to convince yourself you were probably dead._

“*My name…” She spoke after a long silence, her beautiful voice practically singing in your ears. “*Is Toriel. How are you feeling, small one?”

 _Small one?_ Yeah, guess you were pretty damn small compared to her. At least she didn’t call you a kid.

“Oh…” Your voice came out weaker than you expected. You cleared your throat again. “I’m fine.”

And then you awkwardly pause again. Just how were you suppose to start asking this being questions? Was it even worth asking questions? You were probably dead, anyway.

She grins at you again, and it makes your heart melt a little bit. There is something very genuine about her kindness she is presenting to you. It’s not the kind of fake smile that society expects people to wear in public… this is a legit smile; because she is actually glad to hear that you are ‘fine.’ Maybe this was your guardian angel that has come to welcome you to heaven. _Haha, yeah right…_ Heaven was too good to be true for the likes of you.

“*I’m glad that you got some rest. You needed it.” She nods to you before continuing. “*I just finished baking a butterscotch-cinnamon pie. It’ll be cool enough to eat in a few minutes. I bet you are hungry.”

“Wow…” You say, not even thinking. You flush again, feeling rather embarrassed about your awkward first impressions with this unique individual. “Y-yeh, I am pretty hungry.”

Toriel (a gorgeous name, you note) walks into the room and stands next to you. You know you should have more guard up since you were still unsure of her true motives, but you find your feet are glued to the spot. You can only stare wide-eyed up at her as she towers over you. Her eyes soften in response to your intense look. 

“*Do not be afraid, my child.” _Oh, there it was… she called you a fucking kid._ “*I mean you no harm.”

“I…” You start, but you can’t grasp the right words. There is SO much you need to ask her. Like where you were, how you got here, what had happened and… if there was a way to not sound offensive (which you tended to be by nature), what was she exactly? But your mouth refused to work as this large creature-like woman stood near you. “I, uh…” You tried again.

“*I’m sure you have many questions to ask me.” She said softly, folding her hands in front of her. “*And I can answer anything to the best of my abilities.”

You repress the urge to shudder. Her voice sounds so unusual. So calming. She _definitely_ wasn’t human… How could you **not** be dead right now? How could being **dead** feel so much like being **alive**?

“Um… Ms Toriel.” You start. Your tongue becomes caught when she raises a brow at your choice of addressing her. “Er… Are… are you an angel?”

“*W-what?” Toriel’s face looks bewildered for a moment, then she snorts a strange laugh. It sounds exactly like a series of ‘bahs’. Yes, the kind of sound a sheep makes. “*You flatter me, my child. No, I’m just a funny old lady.”

Your face burns hot. _Oh way to go, dip-shit, that was definitely the best question you could have started with…_

“Uh…where am I?” That was better. You’d work on figuring out what she was later… maybe it will be brought up.

“*The Ruins. It is what use to be the capital of our kingdom.”

 _Huh_ … now that stirred even more questions. What kingdom still existed anywhere close to your town?

“Is… is this place still close to the Mt. Ebott sight?”

“*Why, yes.” She said, looking a bit somber for a moment. “*We’re actually under it.”

“Under the mountain?” 

Toriel nods. You can’t quite believe it. So you fell… in a hole… and now you were under the mountain? Was that what it’s like to be dead? You just sort of… became a being that existed under the earth where you had died?

“How… did I get here?” Okay, making progress with these questions.

“*I presume that you fell. I found you…” She hesitates before continuing, her face contorting a bit. “*I found you severally injured in the far side of the Ruins. There are a few holes that have started forming high up above the Ruins… and you were laying just under one of them. So I brought you back here and tended to your wounds.”

Suddenly, the memory of the pain came back. It was a horrible pain. You were pretty sure you had snapped every bone and muscle in your body from that fall. You swallow a hard lump in your throat.

“So I’m not dead…” You murmur more to yourself.

Toriel smiles, but this time it’s mixed with a bit of unease. “*No… but you would have been if you had not been tended to.”

You feel faint for a moment. You sway a bit and Toriel is suddenly at your side, holding you up. “*Please, sit.” She insists. “*You must still be very weak. I did all I could to heal you, but your body still needs to do the rest on its own.”

“H-heal?” You ask weakly. Toriel guides you over to her large armchair and you practically sink into it.

“*Yes, my child.” She is holding her large, paw-like hands out to make sure you are not going to fall over before she continues speaking. “*I apologize, I could not get all your wounds to heal perfectly. You still have a lot of scars….”

Oh yes, the ones on your arms. You hadn’t looked to see if you had them anywhere else.

“*I’m confident they will heal a little bit more after you eat something.” She says, giving you a reassuring look.

That logic doesn’t make much sense to you. Eating didn’t magically make scars go away.

“Uh…” Now was the time to address her appearance. You paused rather long, rolling over the words in your head. As much as you got kicks from offending random strangers that were just too bland and normal for your liking… this was not the time. Toriel had done a great deal to keep you alive and healthy, it seemed. And she was…. well… probably capable of severally hurting you if she wanted to. So pissing her off didn’t seem like the best option.

“Toriel…” You went for the less formal approach this time. She seemed to approve of this more. “I don’t mean to be rude but… uh… what are you?”

She grins widely, revealing a large set of sharp teeth in her mouth. You try not to stare, or appear intimidated. She seems to have been anticipating this question above all others.

“*Well, my child. I am a monster.”

You frown up at her, a bit confused. “That… that’s not suppose to be ironic, is it?”

“*Hardly.” She says, her voice turning cold. _Oops, maybe that wasn’t the best response._ “*But maybe to you, it would seem to be ironic, no?” She sighs a bit, closing her eyes for a moment.

“I… don’t understand.” You say simply.

“*Tell me, what would you define as a monster?” She asks.

Suddenly, you feel very uncomfortable. You know what the word means to you in day-to-day expressions. However, it seems that that is not the right answer.

“*Go on.” She says softly, her voice becoming soft and silky again. “*I promise you won’t hurt my feelings.”

You gulp again, sweat starting to form on the palms of your hands. “Well… I’d say a monster is someone who is cruel and…” You pause, not liking what your mind first went to. “Evil.”

Toriel only nods, grinning sadly. “*I’m not surprised. My child, do you know how that word got such a meaning among the humans?”

You sink lower into the chair. Part of you can’t help but feel like Toriel was guilting you, just because you were a human. Perhaps it was the fact that she finally used the word… 'humans'… emphasizing on the fact that she was not. “Uh… no, I don’t believe I do,” you confess.

Toriel’s large, dark eyes become very sad for a moment. It was as if your words only confirmed her worst fears. There was definitely something there that was much deeper than you could ever imagine. Maybe even something personal.

“*After all these years…” She whispers gently. Her voice had cracked a bit towards the end. “*And it seems that humanity has forced itself to forget us.”

You sit there awkwardly, completely unaware of what she was talking about. Then something occurs to you… if she really was a monster, did that mean… all the silly myths and fictional stories of elegant beasts and creatures were…. real? “Holy shit…” You murmur out loud.

The moment the words came out of your mouth, you instantly regretted it. Toriel had flashed an intense leer into your eyes. Her gaze was fiery. “*Do not use such words in this house.” All the soft, and smooth sounds of her voice had vanished. She spoke with an iron grip now. Full of authority.

You feel your body shrink in on itself. “S-sorry… m-ma’am.”

She squints angrily at you for a moment. She definitely didn’t like your use of formal addresses. Maybe it was because those were human titles. _Christ, you didn’t know…_ All this was so new to you.

She clears her throat, softening her gaze again. “*It’s fine.” Her voice still sounds stern as hell. “*I don’t know what customs you have grown up around, but that kind of language is unacceptable around here.”

Now you felt a little patronized. You try not to show it. There was a reason you started to curse so much growing up, and it was because you had a strong opinion that formality and politeness was overrated. But again, this was not the right circumstance to bring up such a debate.

“I’ll be more careful about it.” You say, gazing down at your lap. Now that your eyes were there, you noticed that you were not wearing your own clothes. You were wearing some strange sweater that felt just a bit too tight on you. And your ripped up jeans were replaced by a pair of childish looking shorts. No wonder she kept calling you a kid. You probably looked ridiculous in these clothes.

_Where did these clothes come from?_

“Where, uh… where are my clothes?” You catch yourself from cursing again. Fuck, this would be hard to do.

“*I washed them for you… they got…. a little dirty and torn up from your fall. I don’t know if you can still wear them.”

Your face flushes at the thought that she had to have undressed you and redressed you in children’s clothes. _How fucking awkward…_ You try to push the thought away.

“Oh, it’s probably okay…” You admit. “My clothes were already pretty worn and messy.”

Toriel eyes you strangely. You shift your gaze away again. Great, now she was probably judging your choice of fashion, too. Not that you cared what she thought, but it didn’t help the tension building between you two.

“*I see… well, I can always help you sew them up.” Toriel offers.

“Thank you.” You say simply. However, you don’t want them to be good as new. You like the worn look. 

“*Oh, the pie…” She says, now walking back towards the kitchen. 

You perk up and your stomach does a little flip, reminding you how hungry you still were.

“*I will bring you a piece.” She assures you. “*Please stay seated and rest some more. And then while we eat, I can answer more of your questions.”

You nod as she disappears back into the kitchen. Yeah, you definitely still had more questions. Like how the hell monsters actually existed and were somehow living under a mountain. That concept still hadn’t completely sunk in. Maybe it was because Toriel was the only actual monster you have seen so far. And being in her presence still felt very surreal. 

You chewed your lower lip nervously. You had to work on speaking and asking these questions more carefully from now on. Toriel definitely seemed like the kind of person who didn’t appreciate your kind of mannerisms. _This was gonna be fucking tough._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Edit: I suck at naming chapter titles... I really hate giving titles to anything, honestly. But since this is a punk rock themed story, I'm just gonna name all the chapter titles after punk, grunge and other fun rock songs.
> 
> This Chapter is The World Has Turned And Left Me Here by Weezer.


	4. I've Got My Back Up Against The Wall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Believe me, I still love Toriel.  
> But I'm trying to write realistically from an adult's perspective of this situation... Not a kid's. :'P Goat mom would intimidate anyone who's never seen a monster before, I think.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (I know all of you are smart, smart readers so you guys know from looking at my weird-ass tags to this story that Reader is going to happen upon the Skeletons eventually. But patience... I didn't want to hastily skip over Toriel's moments in the spot light. :) I have a few ideas I'm mulling over, so bare with me. And enjoy!)
> 
> Please, check out my tumblr if you haven't yet: twodeeweaver.tumblr.com  
> All my art and other creative shit is posted there. <3

You blow awkwardly on the scalding hot tea, trying your best to have some form of manners. After woofing down your pie like a savage beast, you realized just how inappropriate your mannerisms were in the eyes of your hostess. You couldn’t help it… the pie was _absolutely_ delicious. And Toriel was right… it somehow just gave you energy instantaneously. It was amazing! Your arms started to ache less and you felt like you could run a marathon. What was in that pie??

Blowing on the tea caused it to sort of sputter everywhere, burning the tip of your nose. You hiss angrily, but bite back any more curses from your dirty-ass mouth. You glance up and Toriel is still watching you, sitting directly in front of you in a chair she had pulled up from the dinning table. The look she has almost suggests that your actions were bothering her, because her jaw looks to be tensing with a grimace…. but it’s hard to tell. Her facial features are still too foreign to you.

“Uh… thank you again for the pie. It was really good.” You try complimenting her cooking to lighten the tension.

“*Thank you, my child. It’s a traditional family recipe.” She says simply, taking a sip of her own tea.

You sit there in silence for a moment. _Now that food was done… how about those questions?_

_So Monsters were real. Outstanding._

“I… I can’t believe Monsters are real.” You murmur stupidly. Toriel raises a brow at you and your smile immediately falls. _That sounded a lot better in your own head._ You might as well be saying ‘Wow, I can’t believe albino people are real.’ Because they obviously were if they were standing right in front of you. _Dumb-ass…_

“I mean…” You try to recover yourself. “It’s just amazing. The stories I use to read as a kid were always filled with fictional beings…. sort of like yourself… and it’s wonderful that they aren’t just made up.”

“*I’m sure your stories might be exaggerated.” Toriel comments. Still hard to tell if she sounds upset about this or not…

“Oh yeah, I don’t doubt it….” 

There is another uncomfortable pause.

Now that you think about it, if people didn’t think monsters were real when in fact they actually were…

“Toriel… How long have you and all the other monsters been under this mountain?”

Toriel closes her eyes for a moment and you swear you see that sad, pained look wash over her again.

“*My child…” She sighs deeply. “*I have lost count on the years it has been… Too many.”

You gulp. _Jesus christ…_ It HAD to be a very long time, if humanity has already forgotten their existence. 

“You… you were there when it happened?” You asked in surprise, because it sure as hell sounded like she was speaking from personal experience.

She nods and then looks down at the half empty mug in her lap.

“*Let me tell you a story…” She says with a heavy expression fixated on her face. _This was going to be a long story._

…

 

_*Long ago, two races ruled over the Earth: HUMANS and MONSTERS._

_*One day, war broke out between the two races._

_*After a long battle, the humans were victorious._

_*They sealed the monsters underground with a magic spell._

 

…

Toriel explained the story to the best of her memory. She remembers the days where her people cried and prayed most of all. They pleaded and hoped with all their might… that perhaps they could be freed once again. Those were the days when they all still lived in the ruins.

You sat there, tense and uneasy. _Humans did that to a whole race of beings…_ Of course, why should that surprise you? You had lost faith in your own kind years ago. You even had evidence from history books that humans did these things to _their own kind._ However, hearing it come from a first handed victim… made you feel guilty. You felt personally responsible for what your ancestors had done. And yet, you shouldn’t. You were a completely different generation. _But…_

“If humanity had done that to you, then…” You pause, shifting uncomfortably. You couldn’t meet her gaze, afraid of what you might see in her eyes. “Then how come you helped me?”

You hear her chuckle softly and that gives you courage to look up. Toriel smiles at you softly and suddenly you think you see the age in her tired eyes.

“*Because, I believe no one is truly evil. I believe that humans can be good too.”

Fair enough. You couldn’t argue with that either. People like your friends were a prime example of the small good you saw in man-kind. The thought of your friends made your stomach do an uneasily flip.

 _Your friends…_ were they worried about you? How many hours had it been now that you had been seen running away from the Halloween party at Cat and Nolan’s house? And just after the news of-

You bite down on your lower lip, trembling a bit to fight back those thoughts.

_No, still not ready to face that fact._

Toriel sees you shaking and she tentatively reaches out a hand. “*Are you alright?” Her voice is full of so much sincere worry. It fills you with… something. You aren’t sure what, but suddenly, you are able to smother the emotions trying to surface. 

“Yeh… yeh, I’m fine.” You pause, fully regaining your composure. “So… if the King moved everyone farther into the caverns, why didn’t you go with them?”

“*I did.” She said with a melancholy gaze. “*But overtime… I came back.”

 _Uh-huh…_ There seemed to be its own depressing story there. _You thought it better than to press that one._  

Sitting back up straight, a thought crossed your mind. “Oh! My stuff!” You were on your feet immediately and looking around the house frantically. How could you have forgotten??

Toriel immediately was at your side again and coaxing you to sit back down. “*Relax, your items are fine. I have them all in good care.”

“M-may I see them please…” You demand softly, quivering a bit. 

“*Certainly…” Toriel stands and walks down the hallway from where you came earlier. 

You hoped to God or whatever thing might be listening in this world that your cellphone, **your goddamn cellphone** , still worked from that fall. And on top of that, you hoped that you could get some sort of signal down here. Already, your mind was trying to convince you that it would be no use… if your phone’s signal cut in and out badly from just being at the bottom of a hill at Andrew’s old house…. how was it suppose to work several feet under a hunk of rock?

Toriel returns with your bag. It looks rather unscathed, minus the dirt that had collected on the front of it (probably from impact). 

“*I have put all of your belongings in this.” She says, handing it to you. “*Well, except your clothes which are still hung up outside.”

You take it a little too hastily. Fumbling around only for a brief moment, your hand finds the familiar brick-like object. The moment you pull it out…

“Shi-“ You catch yourself, biting your tongue and looking up at Toriel, nervously. She eyes you coldly but it looks like she appreciates your efforts of controling yourself.

Looking at the phone, it’s… well… trashed. The glass screen had cracked severally and parts of it had fallen out. A huge dent formed in its lower left corner where it probably had hit solid ground, causing the whole back of it to bow unnaturally. _Was it even worth trying to turn it on…_

You press down on its power button for a moment, holding your breath. 

…

_Doesn’t seem to be responding to the command._

Toriel was watching you curiously, her eyes on the phone. The look on her face showed that perhaps this object was probably foreign to her. But you knew as well as she did that this mechanism you held was probably not going to function.

And then…

The phone’s screen lit up after a long, unusual delay.

“Ahhhhh THANK THE FFFFF-“ You shallow down your curse, shifting your eyes. “FFFFFrolicking rabbits?” _Nice recovery, idiot._

“*Errr… so what is that device?” She asks.

“It’s uh…” Did she know what a phone was? It had been a long time since she was on the surface. “It’s a phone.”

“*Oh!” Her face brightens. “*I have one of those!” She reaches into the pockets of her purple gown, and pulls out a _very_ old-school flip phone.

Your eyes bug out for a second. _What? HOW??_ Ironically, that is the same model of phone you had in elementary school. Your dad had bought it for you when you had started riding the bus to school on your own, in case you ran into any kind of trouble. But that was YEARS ago. That phone had to be over ten years old. _But only ten years…._ how the _fuck_ did she have that if she hadn’t been to the surface for (dare you suggest it) centuries?

“*Ah, you look like you recognize this. Yes, it is a human cell phone. You would be surprised the amount of technology that gets washed down here.” Toriel grins. “*And thanks to our practices in the sciences, monsters have been able to work with your old technology and repurpose it.”

 _Clever._ Sounded more legit than your people’s pathetic idea of recycling plastic… _Only could repurpose so much_.

“I use to have that phone when I was a kid.” You say, smiling at the nostalgic memories it brought to mind.

“*Oh… You…” Toriel flushed a bit. “*You are not a kid?”

“Aha… nah.” You sheepishly look down, rubbing your messy hair on the back of your head. “It’s okay, I didn’t bother correcting you because I tend to get that a lot. I’m rather short…”

“*I see. It has also been a very long time since I have seen an adult human.”

You narrow your eyes at her. “Huh… so… what about a kid then?” The way she had said that… Had she seen a human child recently?

Immediately, Toriel covers her mouth with her pawed hand. “*Well…” 

“Has a human child fallen down here recently?” you pry. Suddenly, all those ghost stories of Mt. Ebott are starting to ad up. Most of those stories had formed from the handful of children that had disappeared in the area…

Toriel looks away rather embarrassed. She definitely looks uncomfortable about the subject. “*I’m…” She turns and looks into the kitchen. “*I’m going to go put the pie away.” 

You watch her rush off into the kitchen. You frown, a weird feeling settling into your stomach.

Those missing kids… she must have seen them… or at least knew about them. And now your gut was screaming at you to keep your guard up and not trust her. Was that you being prejudice because she was a monster? Or was that your senses having a good hunch that she might not be so friendly and welcoming as you thought?

Your feet guide you into the kitchen after her. You wanted your questions answered.

“Toriel…” 

Toriel was busily transporting her baked pie into a container, as well as rinsing varies dishes. She did not respond to your address.

“Toriel.” The tone in your voice hardens a bit this time.

“*Yes…?”

“There have been a few missing children in this area on the surface….”

She freezes. Her back is still turned and you can’t see her expression, but you’re confident it isn’t pleasant. 

“Have you seen any of them recently?” Naturally, you start to chew on your lower lip, one of the nervous habits you have. Part of you doesn’t feel comfortable nagging this out of her, in case her answer is… not something you want to hear. But you were never subtle about series manners. You hated tiptoeing around issues. Better to be flat-out and honest immediately; that was your motto.

She was trembling. The dishes she was holding clank against the sink as they slip out of her hands.

“*Please…. understand this, my child. I did all I could…”

_Oh god… this doesn’t sound good._

“*I tried to warn them…”

_Oh fuck no…_

“*They wouldn’t listen to me… they…”

That was enough. Again, your feet guide you away to keep you from hearing the conclusion of bad news…. you start to quickly walk back towards the main entrance, hastily scooping up your bag as you go.

“*Hey! Wait! You can’t go out there alone!”

You don’t listen to her. For all you know, she hurt those children or accidentally killed them or…. _God, you didn’t want to know the details!_ All you knew was those kids weren’t here anymore. And that was because _they were here_. So _you_ needed to find a way out of here. **_Now._**

You run for the door and have to give it a hefty shove to get it open. Once outside, you are greeted by a bricked courtyard. _Only one way to go… straight head._

“*Wait! Please!”

Your running now, bare feet padding frantically on the cold, stone ground. You sprint around what looks like a giant, dead tree and make a run to the right. This place already started to look like a maze of brick walls. Panic bubbled inside you. 

_Please, don’t let me run into a dead-end!_

You don’t bother looking back to see if she is following you; you merely press on.

_I gotta get out of here!_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Edit: I suck at naming chapter titles... I really hate giving titles to anything, honestly. But since this is a punk rock themed story, I'm just gonna name all the chapter titles after punk, grunge and other fun rock songs.
> 
> This Chapter is Back Up Against The Wall by Rancid.


	5. You're In Fight Or Flight Mode

_Mother fucking_ **_shit!_ **

This place was a goddamn maze! A huge, confusing brick maze!

You had weaved in and out of tunnels, jumped over spikes (that appeared to be a defensive blockade) and crawled through tunnels. And now… you were completely lost.

“Where do I go…?” You gasp out loud. 

_The left looked new…. but wait, maybe you came from there? Oh the right…. no, no… you definitely recognized that pillar. Or… no, did all the pillars look like that?_

It was getting hard to breathe. Your anxiety was kicking in… **hard.** You couldn’t control the rapid heaving in your chest.

“FFFFffffuck IT!” You rush to the left and weave through another twisting brick hallway. All of these hallways were tiled in an ugly purple color. They all looked the _fucking_ same…

The hallway lead to yet ANOTHER dead end. But this… there was light! Natural light!

You stop in the middle of the tiny room, looking up above. A ray of light was pouring in into a pool in the very center of this space. It was hard to tell just how high up that hole in the earth was…. but maybe you could climb it?

You hunch over, taking a moment to catch your breath and readjusting your bag on your shoulders. Looking down, you see your cell phone is still clutched in your hand. 

_Oh._

You had completely forgotten to check and see if it worked at all. The conversation with Toriel had distracted you and then… you were running.

You glanced down at the screen, squinting to make out what it said through the horrible cracks. It appeared to have a weird loading screen you didn’t recognize. It seemed to be trying to turn on still… 

“Fuck…” You gasp, the rush of panic still trying to creep back into control. Maybe the damage was effecting it from starting up properly. _Shouldn’t have upgraded to a damn smart phone…_

“*Please.”

Your heart skips a beat and you wheel around. Toriel had caught up to you… and she was blocking your way to the only exit in this room. You couldn’t run away anymore.

“*Please…” She pleads again. She is hunched over and her arms outstretched in very cautious way. Probably trying to not startle you.

“Stay back.” You state simply, shaking a bit.

“*Let me explain…” She begs, her eyes looking rather miserable. She is listening to you, however; she does not approach any closer. She merely stands there, making no sudden movement and watching you very carefully.

“I don’t want any explanations. I want out of this place!” Your voice cracked up an octave.

“*It’s…. not that simple.” She says softly.

You point up to the ceiling. “I’ll make it that simple,” You exclaim, challenging her. “I’m going to climb out of here.” Sure, that sounds a lot easier said than done, but you feel pretty confident that you could do it. You’ve had quite a bit of practice rock climbing as well as roof jumping. And with enough desperation to get out of a possibly dangerous situation? Oh, _fuck_ yeah. 

“*Even if you do climb all the way to that opening…” Toriel says, with a deep sigh. “*You won’t be able to get passed the barrier.”

“You said that barrier was to keep monsters in!” Your temper was building. Was she changing the story on you now? How convenient. 

“*It keeps everything in!” She shouts back. You can see tears building up at the corners of her doe-like eyes. “*Everything with a soul… can come into the barrier…. but cannot go out.”

You glare at her, feeling doubtful at first. You look back up, clenching your fists and still feeling fired up to climb.

“How can I trust you?” You ask.

“*I’ll tell you about the children…” She says, trembling a bit.

“But how do I know you you’ll be telling the truth?”

“*You’ll just have to make your own judgement, won’t you?”

Toriel gazed into your eyes, and that genuine smile creeps up her snout. That _fucking_ smile… that alone looked more honest than any human smile you’d ever seen. And that was saying something, especially since you have just meet this new species only an hour or so ago.

Biting your lip, you look back down at the cell phone in your hand. The screen had loaded…. _There was no signal._ You sigh heavily, looking back up at her.

“Alright…” You grunt. “Then tell me, what happened to those kids?”

Toriel’s hand has found a place on her chest. She pressed down in the the center, and she takes a few deep breaths. “*I don’t suppose we could discuss this back in my house…?”

“No, thank you. I want to hear what you have to say before I go back there.”

Toriel grimaces a bit but nods all the same. “*Okay…”

There is another pause, as you both hold your ground. 

“*The human children… they all came through here at different times. Each one, I offered to take in. I offered them a place to sleep, things to eat… a comfortable home… because…. if they had fallen down here, it meant that they wouldn’t be able to return to the surface. But that wasn’t enough for them.” She pauses, glancing back up at you. “*I have seen it again and again. They come… They leave…. They die.”

“How?” You ask. You really didn’t want to know details… but…

“*Killed… by the hands of the King.”

_Fuck…_

“Why?”

Toriel makes a sound… it sounds distressed. “*Because King Asgore believes if he collects enough human souls…. he can free us.”

You wince. You aren’t really sure how that logic adds up, but it still means one thing: They were killing any humans that came down here.

“*But don’t you see, my child?” Toriel is trembling again. “*I tried my best to keep them safe… but they all did not want to stay here in the safety of the Ruins… they all wanted to try and return home.” She is crying now… at least, it sure sounds like it. Her cries sound very strange to you, but her body language is enough to communicate her grief. “*And so they left… and now they are gone.”

You sigh deeply, feeling your own emotions stir inside you. Watching her pour out her own self-guilt in front of you makes you feel more guilty for distrusting her.

“I’m sorry.” It’s all you can say. It’s definitely not enough, but _shit_ , you weren’t good at comforting strangers. 

Toriel looks up at you, tear streaks down her white furry face. “*Forgive me…” She seems to take a moment to gain her composure. She dries her eyes with the sleeve of her cloak and clears her throat a few times. “*I’m just tried of feeling powerless… I don’t want to see any more humans killed. It isn’t right.”

You aren’t quite sure why, but the sudden desire to hug her overwhelms you. You don’t, of course… that would be too weird after running away from her and accusing her of lying to you. But you could emphasis with her, at the very least.

“I’m… uh…” Goddamnit, why were you so bad at this? “I’m sorry you had to go through that…”

The lack of decent clothes was starting to chill you. “Please, I don’t want you to feel responsible over me. I’m an adult… I… I think I can take care of myself.”

She nods slowly, but she casts you a worried smile. “*And yet, you have never had to fight for your life, have you?”

You gulp. No, not exactly. You’ve gotten in fights. You’ve run from cops who were threatening to beat you. But no one has ever threatened your life before.

“*Some monsters… aren’t as kind to humans as I am.”

“I figured as much…” You mumble.

“*Believe me, the Ruins is the safest place for you…”

You look up at her, feeling rather uncomfortable. _Fuck me in the ass_. It was gonna be really hard to tell her you want to leave too. You can’t stay here with it just being the two of you… there was no way you could live that way, especially with how rambunctious you were.

She hesitates for a moment and reaches out a hand. 

You look at her a bit puzzled.

“*Let me take you back to my home. I will dry your clothes for you.”

“Thank you…” You sigh and take her out-stretched hand. “I appreciate that…”

…

With the flick of her wrist, a flare of flames and heat shoots from Toriel’s fingertips. The heatwave rolls under your clothes that are hanging neatly on a line just outside in the courtyard. 

The moment it happened, you had jumped back in surprise. FUCK! You were literally shocked. Even though Toriel had mentioned magic a few times in her story, seeing it in person had finally convinced you. Magic was real! Holy shit, it was actually real.

Toriel reached out and rubbed the fabric between her fingers and smiled. “*Perfectly dry.”

“Wow.” You are still gaping, absolutely amazed.

Toriel starts to take your clothes down and fold them neatly. She then hands them to you. You take them, thanking her graciously. 

“*I don’t suppose there are still humans who can use magic?” She asks, noticing your surprised expression.

“Nah… definitely not. Just a few hours ago, I thought that magic was just as fictional as… well…” You don’t bother to finish, for Toriel is already nodding.

“*How curious… But on the contrary, humans were never as skilled or as in tune to magic as monsters. I suppose if humanity chose to forget us, that meant they had to give up all uses and affiliations of magic as well.”

“But it is possible? For humans to wield magic?”

Toriel grins at you. “*Yes. However, only some humans can tap into such abilities. And I do not know where one would begin to learn this…”

_Guess that dream might be too good to be true…_

You both return inside and Toriel makes her way to the kitchen. You hang left and go into the first bedroom in the hallway. Toriel had told you that you could change back into your clothes in here. The moment you entered the room… a heavy feeling lingered over you.

It was a kid’s room. It looked like it had been untouched for many years, for a layer of dust had collected on top of all the furniture and toys in the room. 

Had this room only been for the human children that had come through? Surely not…

Another thought crossed your mind… Or had Toriel once had a child? Was that why it was so painful for her to lose all these human children…?

_Don’t think about it…_

Quickly, you tugged off the small kiddie clothes and placed them on the tiny bed. You pulled your skin-tight jeans over your hips and pulled the black t-shirt over your head. Both of these articles of clothing were now full of new holes, but you didn’t mind. _Just adds to your look, after all._ Then you wrapped yourself in your favorite black hoodie and, finally, slipped your patch vest over it. You took a moment and snuggled the fabric of your jacket to your face. Felt so much better to be in your own clothes. You slip your socks on last and just scoop up your filthy boot to set them outside by the door in the hall.

Toriel was waiting for you in the living room. She was sitting in that wooden dining table chair and gesturing for you to sit by her in her comfy reading chair. “*Do you mind if I take a look at your arms?”

You roll up your hoodie’s sleeves and hold them out to her. She takes them gingerly in her hands, looking them over. You gasp when you notice that the scars seem a lot less visible. Did the pie do that?!

“*Ah, it’s good to see you are healing rather quickly.” She says, smiling up at you.

“How… how does that even work?” You gawk at your arms still as you take a seat next to her.

“*Our food is made of magic. Magic has an interesting way of effecting the human body. It allows it to recover HP instantly.”

_Did…. did she just say…?_

“HP…?” You ask softly. Like, health points? _In a video game?_  

“*Why, yes. It’s an acronym. It has to do with your body’s physical and mental condition.”

Well, I suppose that was true. But why were they calling it HP? This wasn’t a game…. 

_…right?_

Toriel sees your face distorted and anxious. She reaches out and touches the top of your fore-arm. You jump a bit, surprised by the strange texture of her padded fingers and palms. “S-sorry..” You say. “I was just thinking…”

“*You must be tired, my child. Here, let me prepare fresh seats in the spare room. You can get an early night’s sleep.”

You bite your lip, watching her stand to her feet. You suppose you could stay one night, but…

“*I was a bit worried that the bed in there might be too small for you. But you might just be the right size to sleep in it comfortably.” She was turning to leave now.

“Toriel.”

She looks back at you, and her smile fades when she sees the desperate look in your eyes. You really couldn’t avoid this subject either. You had to be upfront.

“Toriel, I appreciate all your hospitality and concern for my well being.” _That sounded legit…_

“*Of course, my child.”

“But… I can’t stay here.”

Toriel’s frown deepens on her long face.

“I… I just can’t. I gotta try and go home.”

“*Were you not listening to me earlier?” Her voice sounds cold and hurt.

“Yes, I was. I heard what you said about the barrier and the warnings about the other monsters. But…”

“*And yet, you would rather just walk right into the open arms of death?” She scoffs, and its a mix of crackling heat and a growl in the back of her throat. “*That’s awful foolish.”

You feel a twinge in the back of your mind. Her words are resonating a painful scenario in your mind. The way she leers down at you, as if you were ignorant and didn’t know best…. it was much like how your father use to. Your dad was the kind of being that never gave you a chance to speak for yourself. He always belittled your opinion as well as made you feel small and powerless. Because of this unhealthy relationship, you grew distant from him. You hadn’t spoken to him in three years….

This similarity makes your chest swell and burn with… _there’s that feeling again._  

“It’d be just as foolish to give up so easily and never try.” There’s a bite to your bark. You stand out of the chair and hold your ground on your position. 

Maybe you couldn’t stand up to my own dad… But you sure as hell were going to stand up to a stranger who didn’t know you enough to say they know what’s best for you.

“*Hmph… Excuse me. I have to go do something.” with that Toriel turned on her heels and strode out into the hallway. Instead of going towards the bedrooms, she turned left and went down that staircase to the basement. 

This pissed you off more. She was just going to run away from this argument? _Well fine… Now I can just leave._ Stomping back to the kid’s room, you scoop up your bag. You tuck your boots on rather sloppily and just tuck the laces into the sides without tying them down. You did this a lot when you were frustrated and just wanted to get going…. 

Stopping and looking one last time at the kid’s room, your heart pulses painfully. You shouldn’t be so harsh on Toriel… she was probably hurting. She was probably lonely in here. But you still knew what you had to do. Hitching your bag securely on your shoulder, you made your way down into the basement after her. You would find her and officially declare you were leaving. It was the least you could do.

…

The basement was cold and very dark. Actually, this was definitely not a basement. This was some long underground hallway. You walked down it for a while, a bad feeling settling over you. Where the hell had Toriel gone?

You turned a few corners just as the hall was getting more narrow. You turn again and you see the outline of Toriel standing in front of a giant stone door. You stop, watching her carefully for a moment. She didn’t appear to be doing anything in particular…. just standing and staring up at this door.

“*I can’t let you leave…”

You were a bit startled that she knew you were there. That feeling in your stomach was only getting worse.

“*This is the only exit in the Ruins. I’m going to destroy it.”

“What? Why the hell… Toriel, just listen to me-“

“*Watch your mouth!” Toriel snarls as she wheels around and a fan of flames lick at you from an alarmingly close distance. You jump back, cursing even more.

“*Just because you aren’t a child doesn’t mean you should say such vile words…” Toriel says, the flames around her dying down and sending the room back into an erie darkness.

“Toriel!” You were rather ticked off that she was offended by your mere words when she almost just set you on fire. “Listen, I get that you are trying to protect me but-“

“*You want to leave so badly?” She cuts you off. “*Hmph… you are just like the others.” Flames were slowly starting to ignite around her hands… they floated gently in tiny orbs upon her command. The moment your eyes saw them, a strange feeling pulsed inside you again. It was a strong pull in the center of your chest. Almost as if… something was trying to come out. You wince, overwhelmed by the scene unfolding in front of you. You take a step back.

“*There is only one solution to this… Prove yourself.” Toriel says, the flames glowing brighter now.

_Was she… challenging you to a fight?_

“*Prove to me that you are strong enough to survive.” She hesitates for a moment and a look of recognition flashes over her face. “*This feels… so familiar.” She attempts to shake it off.

A soft light was starting to glow around you. You start to panic. You weren’t sure if that was her magic doing something to you or what, but you were not going to wait around and let her have her way with you. _Fuck this shit!_ Holding tight to your bag’s straps, you make a hasty sprint towards her. Just as she is starting to snap out of her bizarre daze, you duck under her (and her flames) and charge into the stone door. Luckily, for you, it opens a lot easier and faster than you anticipated.

Toriel gasps in surprise at how fast you reacted to her challenge. She swings around and you can feel the heat of her flames flying around you as you run. 

“*NO!” Her bleated cry echoes down the brick hallway.

A huge grin spreads over your face. You cannot _believe_ you pulled that off! You were home free! A soft laugh escapes your lips.

…

You continue sprinting down the hall, almost winding yourself. _Fuck…_ how long was this stupid tunnel?

The hall goes on for several more feet… _or miles, as it sure fucking feels like._ Finally a doorway comes into view which is also blocked by another stone door. You stop at it and catch your breath for a few seconds, but not too long. You aren’t sure if Toriel is following you again. 

You push against this door.

It doesn’t budge. _Shit._

You shove harder. It barely moves an inch. _C’mon, you fuck face! (The door clearly has no face, but whatever…)_

You take several steps back and then charge into it with a forceful slam. This time, the door does open and you go flying into…

“FUCK SHIT GODDAMNIT THAT’S COLD!” You stand up quickly, desperately clawing at your face to brush off the freezing… _snow?_

You look around, bewildered. You can’t believe your fucking eyes.

There was snow. Everywhere. And trees! Thousands of tall trees! It looked like a goddamn tundra.

You look back at the door, and see that it goes to a huge stone wall. The Ruins must be divided up under the mountain. _…were you still under the mountain??_ You look above and all you see is darkness. Can’t tell if that’s a night sky or the top of the earth. This sure as hell didn’t look like you were underground… but… it was only Halloween. There was no where above ground in your area that had snow like _this!_

You feel faint for a second. You quickly close the stone door behind you and lean against it, gasping. Looking down at your feet, you remember your shoelaces weren’t tied. You hunch down and quickly tighten them, blocking out the cold on your toes as best you can.

_So where to now…?_

There seemed to be a path weaving through the trees straight ahead…. but where did that lead to?

 _Somewhere safe?_ Yeah, right. If Toriel was telling the truth, any kind of monster establishment would not be a safe place for you.

You gulp and tremble in the cold breeze that was drafting through the trees. _What did the other monsters even look like…? How did they act…? Surely, all of them wouldn’t attack you on sight… hopefully…_

**_CRACK!_ **

You jolt, jumping a few inches in the air. _What the fucking hell was that??_

Something was out there. Better get moving!

You grip tight to your bag on your shoulders and start to make a slow jog down the worn path. Your eyes dart side to side, looking for any figures or movement. All had fallen still and quiet again. But you sure didn’t trust that you were safe, not for a goddamn second. Puffs of heat cloud around you as you start to pant. You were getting tired from all this running… but you couldn’t stop yet.

Just as you think you might have made some distance between you and that sound, an ominous shape catches your eye over your shoulder.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” You start running. That was definitely someone.

The snow crunches loudly under your boots. _What do I do if they attack? Where can I hide??_

You make a sudden halt at a bridge. It looks very small and rather unstable. There were bars awkwardly placed on it, as if to keep something out. You were confident you could slip between those, but… it was the bridge you didn’t trust. And that fall look awfully far if it-

“*H u m a n…”

You think your whole body might have just frozen up stiff. _Oh god, that was deep voice… and it came from right behind you._

“*D o n ’t y o u k n o w h o w t o g r e e t a n e w p a l ?”

_Uhhhh…._

_“*_ T u r n a r o u n d a n d s h a k e m y h a n d .”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel bad for Toriel... but she can seem a bit overbearing. She can't tame a wild punk child. :'D  
> Also... its probably gonna suck next chapter for poor Reader... what, with having a skeleton phobia and all. :'P  
> Ohhhhh weellllll.
> 
> Stay tuned! Thanks for all the kudos! <3
> 
> And if you haven't, check out my tumblr:  
> twodeeweaver.tumblr.com
> 
> **Edit: I suck at naming chapter titles... I really hate giving titles to anything, honestly. But since this is a punk rock themed story, I'm just gonna name all the chapter titles after punk, grunge and other fun rock songs.  
> And I KNOW, I keep changing this chapters title... There's just too many good names from punk songs :'P
> 
> The song title for this chapter is from People II: The Reckoning by Andrew Jackson Jihad


	6. It's Been The Worst Day Since Yesterday

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The skeletons have arrriiiiiivvved.  
> Sorry for such a late update. I've just now wrapped up all my finals, but now I've been occuping my time with learning some new programming. I might still update a bit slow, so stay patient, you lovely people. <3
> 
> As always, check out my tumblr if you haven't: twodeeweaver.tumblr.com

You thought you were gonna shit yourself. You were fucking _terrified_ to look around. What kind of being would they be with such a deep voice like that?

You turn slowly, trying not to tremble. The dark silhouette from earlier was standing directly behind you. Too fucking close for comfort. To your surprise, however, they seem to be the same height as you. Maybe even smaller...

Okay... Maybe you would be fine...? Maybe they just sincerely wanted to meet you...? 

And why the fuck could you not make out what they looked like being this close to them??

You look down to see they had a thin, clawed-like hand extended to you. Tentatively you reach out your hand... You take a hold of their's and-

...

A loud-ass fart noise rips through the air. Like, the _wettest_ fucking fart you've ever heard.

Normally, this crude humor would have made you piss your pants from laughing like a nine year old child. _Yes, you were mature._ But the context of this was so off putting, you merely stare down at the ground awkwardly.

Then, you look up. But you wish you hadn't.

Your greeter was no longer a black silhouetted shape. They were, in fact, a skeleton.

_Ok… You definitely think you shat yourself._

"Ah..." Was that a scream? Did you just try to scream? All that escaped your mouth was a faint, choked gasp. _Pathetic..._

The skeleton had released your hand and was grinning at you. They had tucked their hand into the front pockets of the hoodie they wore.

"*heh heh heh... it's just a whoopee cushion, pal. the joke is old but still gold." They giggle to themselves.

You continue to stare in full disbelief. 

_Really? A fucking skeleton?_ Of course there had to be a skeleton monster down here. Of all the fucking stereotypical things... You had to run into a skeleton. 

You remain frozen to the spot and your whole body starts to shake from head to toe.

"Ahh..." You attempt to say something, anything, but you are still in too much shock. I mean, this was a walking, talking skeleton standing right in front of you. Literally, it is your worst nightmare come to life.

The skeleton now winks one of its eye-sockets at you. How the fuck did it do that?? That made no logical sense to you.

"*hey buddy, i didn't know that humans could **rattle their bones** too." They give off another series of chuckles at their own joke.

After a long, silent pause on your behalf, they start to look uncomfortable. "*hey pal... it's only a joke. lighten up a bit..." How was this skeleton able to have such animated facial expressions...? "*what, are skeleton puns just not your thing?"

_Well, you could say that..._ It probably had more to do with the 'skeleton' and less the 'pun.'

"I'm..." Your voice cracks. Your words feel tightly lodged in your throat. Part of you felt like this monster wasn't going to hurt you... At least, not immediately. Yet, you still couldn’t shake the irrational fear and the anxiety eating at your insides. You were probably being rude as hell for staring at them and gawking silently. God, you were a fucking mess. _Why. WHY did it have to be a skeleton...?_

The skeleton cocks it's skull at you, their expression some how shifting more to a look of feeling awkward. 

"*uh... hey, you aren't... afraid of me, are you?"

_Yes._ Yes you are very much afraid. God, you want to scream and run so bad. 

You feel your breaths pick up in pace. Your chest is heaving, working hard to keep your lungs working.

_Fuck, here it came._

Now that you had been down here long enough, the reality of the situation was really starting to kick in. Your anxiety was starting to spiral out of control.

“I…” It comes out as a squeak.

Again, _fuck it!_

You spin on your heels and rush over the bridge, flailing as it shakes unsteadily under your weight. You make it through the ridiculously large bars when you hear the skeleton call after you.

“*h-hey… it’s okay, pal! i really don’t mean you any harm.”

Yeah, you were probably being super fucking rude. _Whatever!_

The panic attack was about to spill over and you wanted to be alone for it. Especially away from a monster that was your worst phobia. 

You cross the bridge and keep sprinting. A second wave of adrenaline has shot through you and you have no trouble making distance between you and the skeletal monster. You pass a check point stand of some sort and a weird looking lamp… yeah, those things are bazaar as shit to be out in the middle of a snowy forest, but that really didn’t matter right now. _You gotta find a place to hide._

The trees seem to weave in and out for miles… you’ve turned off to the left of your original path and come to a high clearing that is pretty secluded with brush and plants. There was a lone snowman sitting on this high point. Someone must have built it…? It seemed so off-putting in a place like this. You finally sink to your knees next to the snowman and stare at it in disbelief. Then the tears come…

You cry and cry and cry… as loud as you fucking want. No one can probably hear you, thank god. You just want to be alone to ride this out, anyway.

“*Hey…”

You snort and look around in bewilderment, trying to wipe the snot from your face.

“*Are you okay?”

You don’t see anyone. The panic still prods you uncomfortably in the gut and you can’t help trembling from nerves and the cold. Now that you had sunk to kneeling in the snow, your pants were soggy and chilling you down to your core.

“W-who’s there…?” You croak in between gasps of air.

“*I’m right here.”

Realization hits you and you turn to look at the snowman. It looked like a normal snowman (just rather oddly shaped) at first. Now looking at it again, you notice its beady, little, black eyes blinking up at you.

“Ah fuuuucking shit…” You moan, your chest still heaving. _Really? A snowman monster? Great…_

The snowman looks a bit offended for a second. “*Oh, I…” It looks down slightly and then back up at you. “*I’d give you space, but I’m kinda frozen to this spot…”

You sigh, sputtering a bit. You attempt to regain your composure, but it’s fucking difficult. Once you let yourself go and hit that point of no return, it was hard to bottle it back up. It wasn’t _healthy_ to try and bottle it back up again…

“Sorry, I… I thought…” You mumble, then stop yourself. Telling the snowman that you thought they weren’t alive would probably be really rude. Goddamn, you were being an ass to everyone today. _But could you really blame yourself…?_

“*It’s okay. I understand… everyone has their bad days.”

You look up, a bit surprised. “Yeah…” you croak. You wipe your face with your hoodie’s sleeves to keep your eyelashes from freezing in this cold. 

“*Want to tell me what’s wrong? It might help.” The snowman offers.

_Tell you what’s wrong?_ Where do you even start…

“Uh… I, um…” You bite down on your lower lip, trying to keep it from shaking as you talk. Somehow, you feel like you can open up to this random snowman that is frozen to this one particular place. Why the _fuck_ not? Who would it tell? How could it really _judge_ you, for that matter?

“I’m a… I’m lost. I came from pretty far away. I don’t know where I am. I don’t know where the fuck I’m going. I’ve never seen any of this before,” You gesture to the snow and trees around you, hoping this sounded vague enough. “All of this is all really shocking and new.” You hesitate, glancing over at the snowman to see a reaction. You were hoping that it might not know what you _really_ were. 

The snowman’s face looks frozen stiff…. doesn’t move an inch.

“I… I’m scared.” You mutter as tears fall down your face.“And cold. And goddamn worried that I won’t be able to get out of this place.” The tears fall from your cheeks and vanish into the white snow. You open your mouth again but instead of words, you merely suck in air with a horrible tremble. _Still not ready to talk about the other issue from before all this…_

Ultimately, this was a lot for you. You normally didn’t admit any kind of weakness to people, especially strangers. But this scenario had allowed you to overlook this sense of pride. Plus, your panic attacks would surely suffocated you if you didn’t get some of the weight off your chest.

The snowman is silent for a second… then, it finally perks up. “*Say, you look like you could use a little pick-me-up. Would you like a little piece of me?”

“W-what?” You are pretty confused by that. Seems really fucking creepy to offer a piece of its own body to you. That was like you giving up a chunk of your own flesh to someone. _And why…?_

“*It’s okay… just take a piece of me. You’re a human, right?”

Your face strains with worry. _Oh shit…_

“*One time, another human came through and took a piece of me to eat. It helped them feel better. It was kinda rude because I had told them that they could have it only if they took it with them on their journey. But seeing that it made them feel better, I didn’t stay mad for long.”

Your jaw starts to hang open. Was this snowman talking about one of the human children that Toriel had mentioned…?

“Are… are you sure?” You ask. Part of you wants to ask about the human it had seen, but-

“*Actually, now that I think about it… that might have been a dream. I can’t remember. I’ve been frozen here for so long, I think it’s effecting my head.”

You stare at the snowman, unsure how to respond to this.

“*But anyway, I’m sure my piece will still make you feel better if you eat it. And don’t worry about me, it’s no big deal. I’m stuck here so it makes no difference.”

This snowman seemed rather strange to you… and awfully forward. But, you had to hand it to them, you felt loads better now.

“So I can just… take a chunk of you?” This was _fucking_ weird.

“*Yeah, go ahead.” You almost think you see the snowman’s smile widen a bit.

You reach out and take a chunk of the snow out from the side of the snowman. It… really just looks like normal snow. You bring it to your mouth and decide to give it a sniff before biting into it. Immediately, a familiar sensation fills you as you swallow. It’s just like how you felt when eating Toriel’s pie. You take several more greedy bites… the energy just pours into you instantly. It feels _so_ good. You feel so much better. Man, you hadn’t realized how much you needed that…

“Thank you.” You whisper to the snowman. You can’t explain it, but this strange act of kindness really moves you. Especially since you anticipated a lot more hostility from monsters.

“*No trouble at all. Glad to be able to help.”

The snowman goes silent now and still doesn’t move. You can’t tell if this is normal or not… and after a few moments of silence, you decide that it has nothing more to say. You weakly wave to it and walk back to the path.

_Okay… that was… something._

Now that you are alone again, the dreadful feeling comes looming back over, but you are confident you won’t freak out or cry again. You had to get your head straight. You had to figure out where to go, and most importantly, how to get out of this mountain.

_Was it even possible…?_ There goes your fucking head again, immediately doubting. 

So… was going the way you were going originally the best option? Or should you try-

“*human?”

You wheel around in fright. It was that skeleton again.

“*hey… no need to worry…” The skeleton pulls their boney hands out of their hoodie pockets and shows them to you. Reminds you of a ‘I’m unarmed’ gesture. “*i won’t hurt ya if you won’t hurt me.”

What, did they really think you would actually try and take a swing?

"I-I'm sorry…for running…” You manage to get out. "It's just that... I... Well..." How the hell were you going to put this lightly to them? _Oh, by the way, what you are? Yeah, I’m fucking scared of that. Irrationally scared of it._

The skeleton chuckles and gives you a hearty shrug. "*it's cool... i can't say i blame ya, pal. this is probably your first time being around a bunch of monsters and a spooky skeleton, huh? i’d be pretty scared too.”

You couldn't have put it better yourself. Thank god, this guy seemed to be really understanding. It sure also helped that their voice had suddenly changed... It went from being cold and deep a while ago to a rather mellow tone. The kind of voice you associated with a sleepy, calm bro that just wanted to hang low and be chill with friends. _Hmmm..._ Couldn't really say if this skeleton was male or female though... Or neither. 

“*by the way, i’m sans. sans the skeleton.”

“H-hi…”

Okay, _c’mon_ , pull yourself together, and try and be polite. Just ignore the fact that it’s a goddamn skeleton. 

The skeleton shifts their weight from foot to foot for a moment, staring at you from the side of its eye-socket. You could tell they were still looking at you because a dim speck of light inside their skull seemed to act as pupils. _Curious…_ Okay, and now that you weren’t totally fixated on the fact that they were a skeleton, you noticed there were small differences in this one compared to a human one. The stocky proportions made them appear to be rather short, while also kind of… dense? That seemed like the best way to describe them. You normally didn’t associate skeletons to have flesh or fat on them, but this particular skeleton did seem to have a rather plumper feel to it. Even their skull was huge! Their head was probably twice as big as your own. It didn’t seem to make much sense… however, the fact that they were wearing clothes and hiding the rest of their anatomy left it as a big mystery. Not to mention, this was a monster, after all. Not a human skeleton that was magically walking and talking. _Or maybe…?_ God, the possibilities as of today were endless. 

“*enjoying the view?” sans’ comment snapped you out of your train of thought. 

“Uh…” You flush a bit, a little embarrassed at how awkward you were acting. “I’m just curious… are you… uh… what is your pronoun?” You wanted to guess male from the deep voice, but you really shouldn’t make presumptions when you hardly new this new species of beings.

The skeleton turned their head to you straight on again and looked at you curiously. _How_ does it look at you curiously? Because somehow the brow of the skull is shifting shapes to animate the eye sockets. _What the fuck…_ that is so unreal looking. You note that you feel a lot less afraid of them to see such specific face expressions. 

“*heh heh… well, as far as i know, i’m a ‘he’.”

_Interesting response._ But okay, Sans was a he. Now that was cleared up.

“*and you?” he asks with a wide grin.

“She.” you respond.

“*ok. cool.”

You both stand there in silence again. You take note that Sans had made an effort to keep more distance between you two this time, rather than your first meeting. Was he trying _that_ hard not to scare you…? You look at his stance. He looks rigid and angled to be on guard. Or so it appears to be… and it makes you consider this instead: Was _he_ the the one being cautious? 

“*soooo any other questions?”

“Well…” You start, but then the sound of something crashing through brush rather loudly startles you. You look around frantically.

“*it’s just my bro. he’s a human hunting fanatic.”

You look at Sans and you are sure to fucking God the color had fully drained out of your face. A brother? A _skeleton_ brother…? That HUNTED humans?!

“*don’t worry, he wouldn’t hurt a **bone** in your body.” Sans says with a wink.

Somehow that still wasn’t very reassuring. You felt the panic quickly rising up inside you again. You look around desperately for a place to hide.

“*here, just hide inside that cardboard box until he leaves.” Sans lazily thumbs to a sloppily crafted cardboard fort house. “*you’ll be fine in there.”

_The fuck?_ Had that always been there? You don’t hesitate on this much more and quickly jump inside the window opening. You crouch down inside it to hide yourself, carefully trying to keep your butt off the ground to prevent more of your clothes from getting wet.

You listen. You hear rather loud stomping of boots through the snow. Someone has approached and stopped just outside of the cardboard box. You’re afraid to look, but you are really fucking curious to see if this other skeleton is anything like the short, stocky one. You peak your head up cautiously… and immediately duck back down.

_Oh,_ _dear fucking_ ** _God_** _._

The skeleton brother was goddamn huge! You’d guess he would tower over you almost two feet or so. You tried to slow the rapid beating in your chest. _Stay calm… be quiet… Ah, shit…_

“*sup bro?” You hear Sans say to the taller skeleton.

As you hold your breath for a moment and your eyes tightly shut, you pray desperately that Sans would be a nice monster and not turn you over to his brother.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Edit: I suck at naming chapter titles... I really hate giving titles to anything, honestly. But since this is a punk rock themed story, I'm just gonna name all the chapter titles after punk, grunge and other fun rock songs.
> 
> The song title for this chapter is The Worst Day Since Yesterday by Flogging Molly.


	7. Dogs Were Barking, Guests Were Parking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Chapter where you finally learn the Reader's Hood Rat nickname...

“YOU KNOW WHAT’S ‘SUP’, BROTHER!”

_Holy fuck_ , you think you are going to burst. That voice… that _fucking_ voice… was hysterical! It’s the kind of nasally, stern voice most people would associate with a silly, skeleton cartoon character. Oh god, you think you’re going to die. You choke back gasps and giggles.

“IT’S BEEN EIGHT DAYS AND YOU STILL HAVEN’T…RECALIBRATED. YOUR. PUZZLES!”

Wow, on top of the hilarious voice, he was awfully loud too!

“YOU JUST HANG AROUND OUTSIDE YOUR STATION! WELL… ACTUALLY… THIS IS MY STATION, FOR ONCE… WHAT ARE YOU EVEN DOING?!?”

You chance another peak at the situation. From your angle, the large skeleton is dramatically bending over his smaller brother. He looks pissed… but he actually doesn’t look too scary to you. Actually, this guy was a hoot! Looking longer, you saw he was wearing some weird…. costume? It looked rather dorky. Maybe that was just because of his tone of voice…. Man, I guess Sans was right? He really didn’t look threatening at all.

“*oh, just admiring your station. it’s helping me relax. you should give it a looksy, too.”

You duck back down again, cursing wildly in your head. _Fuck, fuck, fuck, NO!! Sans, I know I just met you, but… don’t do this..!_

To your relief, the taller brother doesn’t come to investigate. In fact, you hear dramatic stamping of his feet in the snow. “NO!! I DON’T HAVE TIME FOR THAT!! AND APPRAISING MY WONDERFUL CRAFTSMANSHIP WILL NOT HELP YOU GET AWAY WITH BEING LAZY!!!”

You stay quiet, listening more. _What an odd pair of brothers…_

“WHAT IF A HUMAN COMES THROUGH HERE!?! I WANT TO BE READY!!! I WILL BE THE ONE! I MUST BE THE ONE! I WILL CAPTURE A HUMAN!” 

_Ah, shit._ Maybe you shouldn’t be so quick to judge this guy’s appearance. He could still be trouble for you… 

“THEN I, THE GREAT, PAPYRUS… WILL GET ALL THE THINGS I UTTERLY DESERVE!”

Did… did he just address himself as… Papyrus? _Wait a minute…_

“RESPECT… RECOGNITION…”

_Papyrus… and Sans…?_

“I WILL FINALLY BE ABLE TO JOIN THE ROYAL GUARD!”

Or rather… Sans was short for…. _Comic Sans._ They were… named after fonts??

And not only that, Toriel had literally told you that you had HP. _Health Points._ Like being in a _fucking video game._

_What the_ **_actual fuck_ ** _is going on here…?!_

“PEOPLE WILL ASK. TO. BE MY. ‘FRIEND?’”

_Ahh…_ That last comment grabbed your attention back. The bigger skeleton wants people to be his friend? _Wow…_ Suddenly, this guy was more relatable. You narrow your eyes at your knees… what is this place _doing_ to you…? You are feeling sympathy for a skeleton? How uncharacteristic!

“I WILL BATHE IN A SHOWER OF KISSES EVERY MORNING…”

You choke back another fit of laughter. _Was this guy even real?!_

Sans starts speaking again.“*hmm…maybe if we look inside your station-“ 

“SANS!! YOU ARE NOT HELPING!! YOU LAZYBONES!! ALL YOU DO IS SIT AND BOONDOGGLE!”

_B…Boondoggle? Who the fuck says boondoggle?_

“YOU GET LAZIER AND LAZIER EVERY DAY!!!” It really sounds like that bigger skeleton’s foot was beating the shit out of the ground. Snow was crunching and flying like crazy…

“*hey, take it easy. i’ve gotten a **ton** of work done today.” There’s a pause, and Sans finishes it up with, “*a skele- **ton**.”

_Oh yeah_ … _Comic Sans_ … You groan a little. His puns were almost as bad as the font he was named after…

“SANS!!!” The puns don’t seem to amuse Papyrus either.

“*come on. you’re smiling.”

“I AM AND I HATE IT! SIGH…”

Wow, he even verbally said ‘sigh’ rather than actually sighing. Your head felt like it was going to fucking explode. These two were too unreal. They really felt like… like… fictional characters. Or was this really just the nature of monsters? Was there a reason people wrote fantasy stories in such a way…? Because monsters actually _behaved_ like this? It seemed like a new perspective had just been exposed to you. You sat there in wonder at this new possible revelation, as these two wacky skeletal brothers bickered over pointless bullshit.

“WHY DOES SOMEONE AS GREAT AS ME… HAVE TO DO SO MUCH JUST TO GET SOME RECOGNITION…” Papyrus pauses, and his tone becomes more quizzical. “AND WHY DOES IT FEEL LIKE I’VE SAID ALL THIS BEFORE…? SANS!! I HAVE TO REMIND YOU SO MUCH TO STOP SLACKING OFF THAT I’M STARTING TO REPEAT MYSELF!”

Suddenly the cold starts getting to you. Now you really fucking regret falling in the snow too many times; your jeans were soaking wet. You attempt to clamp your jaws down to keep your teeth from chattering loudly. _Ugh…_ and your nose was starting to dribble. _Gross…_

“*wow, sounds like you’re really working yourself… down to the **bone**.”

“UGH!!! I WILL ATTEND TO MY PUZZLES…”

Uh oh… your nose was… starting to feel irritated.

“AS FOR YOUR WORK?”

Ah, fuck no… _don’t… DON’T…_

“PUT A LITTLE MORE-“

“AHHH- _cheeeu!!”_

Your stupid fucking squeaky sneeze echoes loudly in the cardboard box. Immediately, you _hate_ yourself. Oh god, they heard that… there is no fucking way they didn’t. _Ah, fuck me, fuck me, FUCK ME!_

“…WHAT WAS THAT?? WAS THAT A MOUSE?”

_Oh, shut the fuck up!_ Even though you’re pretty sure your cover is blown, you can’t help but fume silently. It wasn’t your fault every goddamn sound you seemed to make came out tiny and squeaky. It was… after all, how you had required the Hood Rat name: _Squeaks_.

Both of the skeletons seemed quiet for a moment. Then, you hear the shifting in the snow come closer to you…

_Ah, FUCK!_

Immediately, you stand straight up and lunge out of the cardboard box.

“NYEH?!?” You awkwardly bump into Papyrus on your way out as you start sprinting away deeper into the trees.

“WAIT… SANS!! WAS THAT A HUMAN?!? AHA!! HUMAN! COME BACK HERE, I HAVE GOT TO CAPTURE YOU!!!”

_Oh, as if!_ It was kinda incredible how much running you were able to do today. All these adrenaline rushes were probably going to make you crash pretty damn hard later… eh, _fuck it,_ you couldn’t worry about that right now! 

To your horror, as you look back over your shoulder, you see that you haven’t shaken Papyrus off your tail… in fact, he’s keeping a pretty steady pace behind you. _Ah SHIT!_

Your short legs work overtime! You pelt though the snow like a bullet. The speed at which you are able to pick up is alarming, and you are almost afraid that your stunty legs won’t be able to keep up with it. _Oh god, don’t fucking trip!_ It takes all your effort and concentration to keep running smoothly at this velocity. But you keep going. WHOOOO and do you keep _going!_

…

After several minutes and the eerie silence of being alone in the forest returns, you slow to a stop and lean against a nearby tree. You gasp for air, clutching at your sternum. 

“Ahhh…. f-fuck…” You can barely breathe. This is definitely a record for you in the amount of physical activity you have ever done in one go. “I… I think I might have a heart attack.” No, you probably wouldn’t… you were being over dramatic because you were fucking exhausted again. And damn, you were thristy too… this cold, dry air wasn’t helping, either.

You glance back from where you came from. Papyrus, or even Sans, was no where in sight… You gasp again and give yourself a weak, triumphant giggle. You can’t _believe_ you managed to outrun someone with way longer legs than you. You felt _motherfucking damn proud._

You finally catch your breath and readjust the bag on your shoulders. It had started to hang loose from all the running, so you take a moment to retighten the straps to fit more snuggly.

Alright… _onward._

Now that all was still and quiet again, you felt much more relaxed walking down the path in this winter wonderland. The only complaint you had was how exhausted you were now and the cold was really starting to get to you. You were definitely not dressed appropriately for this climate. Wet jeans with several holes in them and a thin black hoodie and vest…? Fuck, you’d get sick out here if you didn’t find somewhere warm. 

You gulp, realizing a worried thought. How much longer did this forest go? Would there be anywhere warm up ahead? Would that warm place also be _safe?_

With the human hunting fanatic behind you, and who knows what other goddamn monsters were yet to come… Things were looking shitty as fuck. You shake your head, cursing to yourself. Don’t be so fucking negative. That’s not gonna help at all! So far a few monsters you had run into had been surprisingly friendly. The snowman… Sans… well, as of right now you still couldn’t trust Sans since his brother wanted to capture you. Doesn’t matter _what_ the fuck he says.

You trudge on, shaking a bit from the freezing air. Your teeth chatter involuntarily. Man, if only you had a extra big coat… then you would probably be fine. You could produce plenty of heat on your own, you just needed some way to insulate it. Just gotta keep going… just gotta…

You perk up when you see another check point stand. You start to approach it cautiously to see if anyone is there, and more importantly, to see if they might be hostile.

You hear rustling form behind the stand. You can’t quite see in it… _Ah fuck_ , your heart was starting to pound again. Please, for the _love_ of punk rock jesus, don’t be _another_ skeleton.

Two black ears poke out and twitch around. Then, slowly a dog head comes out. The dog was gazing off in the opposite direction of you. You remain perfectly still and quite, praying they won’t look your way.

Sure it _looked_ like a dog. But it probably wasn’t a normal dog. Toriel looked like a… a goat rabbit thing. But she was a monster. So this was most definitely a monster as well. Besides, judging by the head on that dog… it looked like it easily matched you in size. Wouldn’t be fun to deal with if that dog had a nasty temper.

The dog munched slowly on a bone shaped treat they had in their jaws and slowly turned in your direct. Their eyes narrowed a bit but not quite in your direction.

_Ah shit._  

You stumble back, taking several steps to give yourself distance. The moment you moved, the dog finally reacted to you and stood straight up on their hinge legs. They looked eager as hell.

“*Did something move? Who’s there??”

_Welp…_ should you at least try to be nice? Maybe being polite will keep you outta trouble for once…

“H-hi… um… I was wondering…” You stop when you notice the dog looking around frantically. They could clearly hear you but… they seemed to not be able to see you. Were they blind??

“*Where are you? I can only see moving things.” The dog said. They had crawled out from inside their check point and stood up all the way on their haunches. _Wow…_ they looked rather interesting. This fellow was a lot less anthropomorphic than Toriel, and yet they did not walk on all four? _Alrighty, then…_

“W-what?” You ask. What did they mean by seeing only moving things? Not blind completely? So they must have seen you when you walked back a few steps.

You noted their get up too. They dressed in rather dashing clothes… bright patterns and colors… _and, oh_ …. they had large hunting knives strapped to their belt.

“*Where are you??” They said again, advancing forward a bit. Instinctually, you took a step back but then immediately regretted it. The dog got a glimpse of where you were and marched over to the spot they had briefly seen you. They stood a few inches taller than you and were blindly staring in the space you stood.

_Ahhhhh fuck…_ this guy suddenly didn’t look so friendly. You kept eyeing those large knifes at their sides. 

The dog made a loud sniff in your general direction and their eyes squinted dramatically. “*What…What are you?”

“Uh… just… someone who is lost.” You manage to get out. Maybe if you held still so they couldn’t see what you were…. you’d be safe?

The dog’s ears twitched and their squinty eyes darted around. They clearly couldn’t see you standing right in front of them. They were eagerly looking around for more movement. “*You don’t smell like anything I’ve met before.” There is a low growl to their words.

Your body starts to involuntarily shake again. You can’t help it… you’re nervous as hell, and standing still out here was making you colder. “P-please… I just need help finding some place warm.”

The dog fixes their eyes on you this time. They must be able to see you as you shake violently. They stare at you for a moment… then their teeth bare fiercely. “*Human?”

_Oh goddamnit, not again!_

You take off running to the left, towards the trees. The dog barks excitedly and bolts after you. You glance behind and see that their hunting knives are out in both their front paws. There’s a terribly wild look in their eyes and you _know_ this puppy means bad fucking news for you.

You don’t make it far… You stop at another large cliff face. It’s way too far down to jump and you aren’t confident you have the strength to try and climb down it right now. You hold perfectly still.

The dog stops a few feet away from you, glancing around and sniffing wildly.

“*Where’d you go, human?!” The dog barks, scanning the area carefully.

It takes all the will power you have to force yourself not to tremble. Maybe you could inch away the moments they were not looking in your direction.

The dog’s nose is in the air now and they sniff out your smell. They can definitely smell you. They were inching closer.

_Ah, fucking SHIT._

A familiar feeling pulls at the center of your chest. You know this feeling. You felt it when confronting Toriel in that tunnel under her home. You look down at the space in your chest where you feel it and that light starts to glow again. What the _actual_ fuck? What was happening to you?? 

You glance back up to see the dog is inches away and they're practically sniffing at your upper arm. They growl when they confirm that they’ve found you. 

_SHIIIIT._

The dog takes a swing at you with one of their knives. You have just enough time to dodge away from it. The moment you move, their wild eyes fixate on you and they start to swing more and more. 

“Awwwh!” You cry out. One of their swings had gotten through to you and you felt a sharp pain. It’s a strange pain; not one you would associate from being stabbed. The pain is not in one particular spot but it seems to buzz through your whole body. What the _**fucking** fuck?_

You jump back several feet, trying to give yourself more space between you and the dog. The light from your chest is glowing a bright reddish pink, but you don’t have fucking time to investigate that. You’ve got an overly excited dog trying to stab you! You make another mad dash back from whence you came to try and out run the dog. So far, it was no use…. their keeping up with you pretty consistently. Plus, the pain was dragging you down a bit.

_God fucking dammit… I gotta get away…_

Before you can even look back again, more of that sharp, unpleasant sensation shoots through you and you let out a blood-curdling scream. The dog had caught up to you and had struck down on your back. But the pain was all over and it caused you to trip and tumble into the snow, face first. Somehow, your body had pumped a fresh supply of adrenaline and you quickly roll away from another attack. This time, you are ready. If this fucker wasn’t going to leave you alone… you had no choice but to defend yourself. You stop on your back and rear a foot back. Just as the dog is face-to-face over you, you give them a good kick in the gut. They let out a high-pitched whine and fall down on the ground for a moment, hugging at their stomach. You take this opportunity to scramble to your feet and get several feet of distance from them. You dart through a few more trees and hide between two large looking pines. You hear the dog come bounding after you, but they go a bit off course. You can see them frantically searching again, this time with a pissed off snarl in their wake. 

“*Where are you?!” they demands with an angry bark.

You remain as still as possible, clutching tightly to the front of your hoodie. Moments pass, and the dog starts to appear tired of searching. They hadn’t managed to come close to your hiding spot. Soon after, they give up and you let out a shaky sigh when they are no longer in sight. You glance down at your chest and the light was gone. 

_What… what was that…?_

Your eyes feel heavy. Your legs were shaking. You felt… _so_ fucking weak... _so_ fucking tired. Was it the cold? Or the blows you had endured? Shit, or both? You sway a bit and suddenly the fluffy snow on the ground looks so goddamn comfortable. You slowly fall to your knees and then plop down on your chest. _Yes…. this snow was… so comfortable._ You can’t even feel the cold anymore. Just a burning, painful heat. It’s rather annoying.

_Make it go away…_

Your eyes slide close and you think you’ll just sleep this fucking nightmare off. Maybe you’ll wake in a better place, and a better time.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHOOO I'm on a writing roll today! Have another chapter! :'D  
> Sorry, Doggo, no hard feelings. He and Reader can probably be friends later on...? Who knows...
> 
> Song title for this chapter is Dogs Were Barking by Gogol Bordello.


	8. Sick And Sad Again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here, have Reader being anxious and sick and miserable. And withdrawals, just warning now.  
> Hope you guys enjoy.
> 
> As always, thanks so much again for the kudos and comments. I really appreciate it. <3
> 
> My tumblr: twodeeweaver.tumblr.com

_Ah… Finally, warmth. Only… ugh, this was a bit too much._

You’re starting to fucking sweat. Your body is getting much too hot. And there was a clammy, weak feeling lingering too. You knew this feeling. It was when you got… _sick._

Your eyes slowly open. That effort alone feels god-awful. As your consciousness returns, you realize just how fucking awful you feel. Your head feels heavy and painful. Your nose is running. Your throat burns. And, oh my fucking god, did you need to pee.

You sit up slowly, taking in your surroundings. You were in a house…?

At first, the thought of all that had just happened must have been a dream. You were hungover… _yeah, that must be it._ You must have crashed at someone’s house after the Halloween party.

_No…_

You didn’t know this house. You’d never seen this living room before. It was quite bare, even for what you were use to among your poor, college friends.

You look down to see you are bundled in a cocoon of blankets. That’s why you’re sweating; that’s way too many fucking blankets for your needs. You struggle to unbind yourself, your arms shaking from your fatigue.

_Oh right,_ your body woke you up because you have one dire objective. You needed to drain your goddamn bladder before it exploded. So where was the bathroom?

Yeah, you probably should be worried how you got here and if you were safe. You must be on _some_ levels of safe, if whoever brought you here bothered to lay you on their couch and bundle you in blankets for warmth.

You stand up, groaning at how stiff and icky your body felt to the sudden weight of gravity. _Fuck me…_ Gotta find that bathroom quickly so you could lay back down. Looking around more, you noticed there was a kitchen off to the right corner of the living room, and then there was a staircase to the left that lead to a second floor. Perhaps the bathroom was up there. You ascend the stairs, minding the loud creaking with every step. 

There were only three doors up there. One door was covered in pictures and signs. You peek inside that one… it was someone’s bedroom. Looked like a kid’s bedroom, more specifically, judging by the action figures and ridiculous car bed. _What was this, the late 90’s?_ Didn’t even realize those were a thing still. 

You walk down the hall to the other two doors, passing a rather comically sized painting of a single, cartoony bone. _Hmmm…_ That was an interesting sight. You could only associate that with two of the kinds of monsters you’ve seen so far… **skeletons** or **dogs.** You weren’t sure which would be worse for you… You hoped this house belonged to neither, even if the chances were slim.

You come to the second door and try it. It was locked… hmmm, guess that was another bedroom? Then you come to the third door which was across from the second. You open it. It was a storage closet, stuffed full of boxes and old coats.

_Wait… where…?_ Your eyes narrow and you look over the balcony to the first floor again to see if you’ve overlooked a room. No, you hadn’t. They didn’t have a fucking bathroom in this house?! “What the fuck??” You declared.

You make haste back down the stairs, your lower abdomen starting to scream at you. God, you _really_ needed to piss. You come to the front door and attempt to open that… only to find that it was locked too. You’re about to panic, when you see a sticky note stuck to the door at just your height level. You squint at it to read it. Whoever wrote it has some horrible handwriting…

‘DEAR HUMAN,

I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, HAVE CAPTURED YOU!’

You pause reading it and groan. Oh god, this must be the skeleton brothers’ house. You read on…

‘YOU MUST STAY HERE IN MY LOVELY HOME UNTIL I COME BACK FOR YOU. I AM ALMOST DONE WITH MY DAY’S WORK. FEEL FREE TO HELP YOURSELF TO WHATEVER YOU NEED. YOU DIDN’T LOOK SO GOOD WHEN I FOUND YOU, SO EAT AND SLEEP ALL YOU WANT.

NYEHFULLY YOURS,

PAPYRUS.’

What the fuck did ’ _nyehfully_ ’ mean? Another thought went through your head and it made you shudder. _Oh geez… if he found you and brought you here…_ jitters ran through you at the image of being held and carried by a skeleton. You were _so_ glad you were unconscious for that…

Fuck, that also didn’t help you solve your problem of having no bathroom. You turn to the kitchen and suddenly you decide you only have one option. You never thought you’d have to do this… but desperate times called for desperate measures; you were gonna have to piss in the sink.

You step into their kitchen and immediately your jaw drops. “Ah, come the FUCK on!” 

Their sink is literally several feet taller than you. And for some goddamn reason the cabinet bellow it looks big enough to stuff one whole Papyrus inside of it. _Why…?_ Who the actually hell designed this awful house!

Knowing you felt too weak to try and climb up to that sink, the next idea comes to you. You look inside their cabinets and find a large cup. _Fuck these skeletons…_ you curse bitterly to yourself. If they were gonna hold you hostage in their own home, then you might as well give them a little trouble back. You set the cup down on the the floor, pull your jeans down and squat above it. Well, at the very least… Papyrus _did_ save you. If he hadn’t found you out in that snowy forest… you might have _died_. On top of that, he brought you into his home to escape the cold and warmed you up with some blankets. That’s twice now that monsters have shown you mercy and helped you out. Sighing, you pull your pants back up and pick up the piss-full cup. You weren’t sure how you were going to be able to dispose of this with the only source to a pipeline several feet above you. _Fuck it…_ you’d deal with it when you didn’t feel like crap. You open the sink cabinet and tuck the cup in there for the time being. It’s the least you could… Hopefully someone wouldn’t stumble upon it and spill it.

Bladder drained, you slink back to the living room and plop yourself back onto the couch. A heavy groan escapes your lips as your head gives several angry throbs. Why did your head hurt so much…? You couldn’t be that sick already, it couldn’t have been 24 hours already since you collapsed in the forest.

_Oh. I know why._

It may not have been 24 hours since then, but it had definitely been over 48 hours since you last had any coffee.

_Coffee. Sweet,_ ** _glorious_** _coffee._ Couldn’t live without it. Literally. Ever since you had started working part time jobs in high school, you had started becoming a heavy drinker of the stuff. And thus, the caffeine addiction had begun. So that answered your question… you felt like utter shit because you were having withdrawals.  _Oh god…_ and it was only going to get worse if you didn’t satisfy that crave. 

You pathetically sigh and pick yourself back up from the couch to return to the kitchen. You kinda doubted the skeletons had coffee. How the hell would monsters be able to grow coffee plants down here? It wasn’t warm enough. But perhaps, they might have tea? You open all the cabinets, scanning the bare shelves for something familiar. Sadly, these guys had less food and supplies in stock than you typically did back home… and that was saying something. You were rather poor. Maybe they just ate out a lot? Or, honestly, maybe then didn’t even eat. _They were skeletons, after all._

Your eyes light up when you see a box that looks like tea. You take it out and scan over the labels. 

‘Honey Tea’

You frown. That didn’t sound like it would have caffeine in it. You glance back up at the shelf that had the tea box and notice it goes back farther. But god fucking dammit, you were too short to see. So, carefully, you start to climb on the counters to get a better look.

“*need help there, bucko?”

You yelp, and your knee looses grip on the counter, causing you to slip back. You fall on your ass rather awkwardly and pretty painfully. “Ah, fuck, ouch!”

“*oops… didn’t mean to spook ya again.”

You look up and Sans is standing a few feet away, leaning against the doorway. How the shit did he get here?! Was he here the whole time (he better not have been watching you pissing)? How did you not at least hear him approaching!? You narrow your eyes at him. You don’t like that he can get around so quietly…. Sans gives you a dramatic blink of his eye-sockets when you don’t answer or respond to him. 

“Uh… I, uh… could really use some caffeine.” You tell him, standing back up off the floor.

“*is that human food?” Sans asks, watching you carefully.

“Nah, it’s not food. It’s… well… it’ll help my head from hurting.” You give the side of your temple a slight tap with your fingertip.

You notice Sans was no longer leaning against the doorway now that you were on your feet again and facing him. You both were standing with a set amount of distance between you. His stance was mimicking yours. It’s the kind of defensive position you make to a possible threat. You smirk, glad to finally be on the same page with someone.

_Seems you both didn’t quite trust each other…_

“*well, kid, sorry to say but i don’t know if you’ll find any of that down here. maybe eat something?” Sans suggests.

Your head gives another painful pulse and you wince a bit, gripping your jaws together rather tightly. “Sure…” you mutter meekly. “What’s there to eat?”

Sans walks passed you and opens the fridge. “*mostly spaghetti and chips. my bro cooks a lot of pasta.”

You glance inside the fridge and its stacked full of containers all neatly labeled spaghetti. “No kidding…” you chuckle lightly.

“*honestly, i’d take you to get some real food, but papyrus said i can’t let you leave the house.” Sans says, taking out one of the containers of spaghetti and glancing it over before he sets it on the counter.

“Oh, that reminds me,” your suddenly not smiling anymore, and frustration returns to you as you remember the real issue at hand. “Why _am_ I being held here? What are you both planning on doing with me?

Sans side-eyes you, his grin widening. At first, you feel a bit creeped out by his reaction to your statement. But then you realize he’s just amused by your enthusiasm. “*look, pal, i’ve got no part in this. like i had said before, i don’t care about capturing humans. as for my brother, he was going to hand you over to the captain of the royal guard…”

“You hadn’t said that before.” You say, starting to glare. “And what will the captain do with me?” You’re pretty sure you know, but you want him to admit it out loud. _C’mon, gimme a verbal reason so I can kick your ass if I need to._

“*i hadn’t?” Sans looks a bit stumped as he gazes off, thinking to himself. “*heh, guess i’m getting times mixed up again…”

You blink at him. What the hell was he talking about?

Sans chuckles and shrugs. His body language felt very dismissive to you. “*kid, you don’t need to worry-“

“I’m not a fucking kid.” Your voice had fallen to an irritated growl. You didn’t like how this guy tip-toed around your questions and acted like nothing was wrong. Fuck that, because there were many things wrong here. One of the biggest ones being that he and his brother were holding you against your will in this fucking house. “Just because I’m small, doesn’t make me a child. I’m a goddamn adult.”

Sans sighs and looks at you for a moment. His expression suddenly looks serious for once and yet he’s still smiling that weird, doofy smile. “*i know you aren’t, pal. i’ve seen human children before.”

You feel your throat get tight. Your mind immediately begins to assume the worst: _Yeah, have you only merely seen them? Or did you partake in killing them?_

“*it’s kinda funny… when i saw you coming down the path from the ruins, i was actually surprised. i had expected to see a child instead.”

He must be talking about the other kids… maybe he was expecting more of them?

“*tell me, you didn’t see a kid in the ruins, did you?”

“No.” you state simply, still leering into him.

“*hmm. so you must have taken their place.” Sans says closing his eye sockets for a moment.

“I don’t know what the fuck you are talking about.” You felt your patience growing slimmer. “But I need you to answer my other question you are avoiding:  what will the captain of the royal guard do with me?”

“*nothing. because i told papyrus that he shouldn’t hand you over to her.”

_Say fucking what?_

“Why’d you do that?” you ask, slightly skeptical.

“*simple. papyrus didn’t know that if he captured a human and turned them over to undyne, they would be killed. so i told him he shouldn’t. at least not yet.” Sans watches you cross your arms and frown rather sourly at him. He chuckles before continuing. “*i said to my bro that he should go talk to her first and ask undyne why she needed a human. then he would understand and rethink handing your life over.”

You felt a little numb hearing all that. “But… why did you do that?”

Sans shrugs. “*why not? you may be rather hot headed, and you _definitely_ got a mouth on ya…” he pauses, giving you a friendly wink. “*but i don’t think you're a bad person.”

You stare at him a bit surprised as he turns back to the container of spaghetti. “*so… wanna try some of this?”

You nod slowly, still watching him. So if this guy has seen human kids before… but he didn’t want you to die like the rest of them… What the hell was this guy’s motives? Was he really and truly just a nice person? Your gut couldn’t tell for sure… but it definitely told you there was _much more_ to this guy than what he displayed on the surface. His smile seemed a bit forced when he looked at you.

Sans walks over to the oven and takes out a pot from the small cabinets next to it. He plops a good chunk of the spaghetti into the pot and turns the heat for the oven top on.

Your head gives another painful throb. You curse again, and notice Sans eyeing you when you do so. Maybe your dirty mouth bothered him like it did Toriel? Perhaps the monsters were more sensitive to that kind of thing. But you couldn’t tell… Sans really wore the same face expression a good 90% of the time, as far as you could tell. It was a bit unsettling. And you knew you weren’t being prejudice, because you saw that his brother was totally capable of expressing himself with his boney face. Still couldn’t understand how a skull could be so animated…

“*that should be good.” Sans takes the pot of heated spaghetti back over to the counter and takes down a ceramic bowl. He dumps the pasta into the bowl and hands it over to you. “* **bone** -apetit"

“Ugh, why do you make puns like that?” You scoff, chuckling a bit. They really were awful…

Sans’ grin widens a bit. “*cus’ it still made you laugh a bit, didn’t it?”

_Hmph, well fine then._

“I guess you guys don’t have microwaves down here…” you comment, eyeing the empty and now dirty pan in Sans’ hand. “I can wash that for you when I’m done eating.”

“*nah, it’s okay, buddy. oh and we have microwaves. papyrus just took ours and left it in the middle of the forest.”

“Why did he do that…?” You were honestly curious to the answer.

“*said he needed it to finish one of his puzzles to help capture a human.”

“Alrighty, then…”

You look down at the pasta and take a wiff. It smells… kinda old. Like the sauce is starting to sour a bit. _Oh well… you’ve probably had worse._ You look back to the living room and notice that there really isn’t a dining table to eat at. Just a ‘coffee table’ that was awkwardly pushed to the wall. You wonder if they called this kind of furniture something else if they didn’t have coffee. You sit down on the floor and set your spaghetti down on the table. You’re about to try it when you realize you don’t have any utensils.

“* **fork-** got this?” Sans is suddenly sitting at the low table too on the other side. He hands you a fork.

“Seriously? But, uh… thanks.” You take it and twist it into the saucy noodles. You take a bite and immediately your mouth wants to reject it. “UuHHHG! What the fuck!!” You sputter a bit as your eyes start to water. Wow, that was _rancid as fuck_.

Sans chuckles at you. “*i never said my brother was any good at cooking…”

“Then why the fuck would you offer this _shit_ to me?” You immediately bite back down on your tongue. Maybe calling his brother’s cooking ‘shit’ was a bit _too_ far. “Err… I mean, why would you let me eat his cooking then?”

Sans shrugs. “*cus’ it’s all we got. unless you’d rather have some stale, cold potato chips.”

That definitely didn’t sound good either… Especially since you were a freak of nature that for whatever reason didn’t like potatoes. You never had, even as a baby. Something about the flavor as well as the texture made it an awful experience for you when eating them. “Well, shit…” Your head pulsed again and it hurt so bad that you had to lay your head down on the wooden surface of the table.

“*you okay there?” Sans asked.

“My head really hurts… I really need caffeine.” You grumble. “You know what an addiction is?”

Sans is quiet for a moment. “*sure…”

“Well, I’m addicted to caffeine. And I haven’t had it in a few days, so it’s starting to do a number on me.” You take your fingers and drag them aggressively through your messy mohawk a few times. “FUCK, this sucks…” you pick your head back up a bit to look over at Sans. “Why can’t you just let me go so I can look for something for my head?You already said you weren’t gonna let Papyrus hand me over to anyone.”

Sans gives you a look that almost reminds you of pity. It makes your stomach turn angrily. “*i mean, if you really wanna strut around town as a human an all… i bet that will go over smoothly.”

 _You were in a town…?_ Thank god, their house wasn’t in the middle of the forest. But he had a point. A town full of monsters sounded dangerous as fuck.

“Shiiiitt…” You stand up, abandoning your pasta and flop back onto the couch. You hold your head delicately.

Sans remains seated across the room, watching you thoughtfully with his hands tucked in pockets on his jacket. “*your head hurts that bad, huh?”

“Yes, dude! Caffeine withdrawals are the fucking worst!” You groan.

“*what does caffeine look like? is there any other names for it?”

You glance over at him curiously. “Well… it’s normally in coffee or some kinds of teas. People make them in pure pill form or sometimes they are in pain killer pills. Why? You know where I could get anything like that?” You’re pretty sure your tone of voice sounds desperate. Whatever, your pride could suck it. You’d give _anything_ for relief of this shit right now.

“*there’s a shop that sells some human products that are found in the garbage dump… there might possibly be something for you there.”

Your eyes get wide and round with hope. _Oh please… Don't fucking care if it came from a landfill._

“*here…” Sans pulls out a random piece of paper and a worn down pencil from his hoodie pockets. “*write down as many human things you can think of that has caffeine in it. i’ll see what i can find for you.”

“Oh thank you… thank you so fucking much.” You whisper pathetically. You take the pencil, noting the bite marks all down it. So, Sans was possibly a nervous pencil chewer? Another small thing you both had in common. Listing things you had in common with a skeleton helped the phobia stay at bay, at the very least. You both wore hoodies… you both chewed pencils… you both didn’t trust each other… _oh yeah,_ you were off to a _great_ start.

“Okay, let’s see…” You try and think of some products while your head is throbbing, madly.

‘coffee, espresso, mocha, cafe, black tea, chai, english breakfast tea, english tea, oolong tea, green tea, white tea, caffeine pills, ibuprofen, motrin, aspirin, tylenol, acetaminophen, codeine…’ That was honestly all you could think of. You were probably forgetting other specific things or scientific terms, but the chances of anything else being available were even more slim. Then, looking it over, you decide to jot down… ‘if you can’t find any of this and they have any alcohol/beer or cigarettes/tobacco, that could help too.’ You glance it over one last time before handing it to Sans.

“*wow, you humans must like your caffeine.” He giggles a bit, looking over your list.

“Hey, it helps us function and relieves pain. Of course we like it.”

“*alright, pal, sit tight. i will be back later. hopefully i’ll find something to help your head.”

You blink and Sans is gone. _Like, poof. Gone._ It startles the shit outta you. You look around to make sure he’s really left the house. 

“Fucking jesus… that skeleton can teleport….” Yeah, you _really_ didn’t like that he could just come and go so easily like that. If you were ever gonna need to make a run for it, out running that fucker was gonna be impossible. Hopefully, it would never come to that. Sans seemed like an alright dude. You really shouldn’t make first impressions and let the irrational fear in the back of your head assume the worst. But still…. you were _trapped_ here. Whether what Sans said was true or not, they really weren’t letting you leave. You felt scared again.

You curl yourself up into a ball, trying to ignore the awful buzz in your skull. It was bad, and it wasn’t helping your mood. You really didn’t want to start crying again… but dammit, you were sad. You just wanted to be home… instead, you were caffeine withdrawn and choking back tears on this couch. Oh yeah, and apparently the prisoner of two skeletons? What a _GREAT_ time this was… When would this nightmare just end, already?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is based on the song Sick And Sad by Streetlight Manifesto.
> 
> Seriously, guys, if you haven't heard of these songs/bands I'm naming these chapters after, I highly recommend you look them up. You never know, punk might just be your BLANTLY CORRECT cup of tea. ;P


	9. Take Warning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a while... sorry, meeple. I've been busy destressing with friends in my hometown. I start school next week. Have some more mellow shit for now. It'll get interesting later :'P Maybe.
> 
> tumblr: twodeew.tumblr.com

You feel a sharp prod on your cheek. You wince but refuse to open your eyes. The withdrawals were getting worse and opening your eyes was the last fucking thing you wanted to do.

"HUMAN." The loud, dorky voice echoes painfully in your ears. Sounds like it's feet away. _Ugh,_ yeah you definitely didn't want to look and see a goddamn skeleton right in your face. 

So carefully, you roll over to where your back is facing the source of the voice. You grumble softly. 

"ARE YOU NOT WELL, HUMAN?"

"Yeah..." You sigh, hiding your face deep in the hood of your jacket. "I'm sick..."

"OH NO!!" Papyrus' loud voice booms again. God, this guy was a pain in the ass right now. Could he not tone down his goddamn volume? "HUMAN, IS THERE ANYTHING THAT I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, CAN DO TO HELP?!"

"Can you please maybe whisper, instead?" You moan, your eyes fluttering open for a sec. All you see is the back of the couch. 

"OH... Alright, sorry, human. Is that better?"

_Loads better..._ "Yeah..." You sigh, sniffling a bit from your runny nose.

"Would you like me to cook you something to eat? Food always makes me feel better!" Papyrus offers, and you can hear the loud shuffling of his boots heading towards the kitchen.

The thought of that gross-ass pasta's taste comes to your mouth and you cough a bit, trying not to gag. "Uh... That's okay, dude...."

"DON'T WORRY... I mean, don't worry. It's not a problem!" You can hear him pulling pans out of the cabinets and ingredients out of the fridge. Sure is making a fucking ruckus...

"Your brother was gonna go get something for my head...." You moan to him from the couch. But now that you thought of it, you weren't sure how long it had been since he left. You had dozed off a bit and lost track of time. Must have been a while if Papyrus was back now. Maybe your head felt worse, but at least you felt emotionally better.

"WELL, WORRY NOT HUMAN! OOPS..." Papyrus pauses as he forgets to keep whispering. "Even though my brother is lazy most of the time, he will come through for someone in need. He always takes care of me when I am not feeling well! But for now, my ultimate cuisine will help you!"

You roll over and finally look at Papyrus. Even though he's a good few feet away in the kitchen, your stomach makes an uneasy turn at the sight of him. You breathe deeply to gain your composure. _Don't be afraid... He really isn't a threat._ This guy was literally just a big, friendly giant. He may be a little naive, but he seemed to be a genuinely nice person. And he at least didn't seem to try and hide any motives, like his brother...

"What's wrong, human?" Papyrus asks. He must have seen the look of fear flash over your face. He had stopped pouring things into a cooking pot and was staring at you rather intently. 

You gulp, not really sure how to explain it to him. You didn't want to seem rude... But you probably couldn't keep your secret from him. Both he and Sans would definitely pick up on your weird behavior the longer you were around them. And you might not be going anywhere for a while...

"Well, see... Uh... Do you know what a phobia is?" You ask the tall skeleton.

His eye sockets squint as he thinks. He taps his finger bone on his chin, causing it to make a comical _clonk, clonk_ sound. 

"HMMM... I'M NOT SURE. WHAT DOES IT MEAN???"

_Wow..._  okay then.

“Well um… It's when you have an irrational fear of something. And I..." You gulp, feeling super self-conscious to say this... "Have a fear of… skeletons..." 

You sheepishly look up to see his lower jaw had dropped dramatically. 

"WHAT?!? I... WELL..." Papyrus rubs the back of his skull and looks rather guilty. It only makes you feel worse too... "DID I DO SOMETHING TO MAKE YOU AFRAID, HUMAN? I KNOW I CAPTURED YOU BUT-"

"Ah, no no! It's not you personally, man. All skeletons make me a bit... Nervous. Hence why it's called an 'irrational' fear." Yet as you say this, it didn't help that you were held captive here. But at this point, seeing how harmless the big guy was, it felt more like a game... A game you just needed to play along with and you'd be completely fine. Or so you hoped.

"I'M NOT MAKING YOU SCARED RIGHT NOW, AM I, HUMAN?" Papyrus asked frantically. He looked just as self-conscious as you did. _This guy was so unreal, seriously._

"Nah, you are good... I'll get use to it. I'm a lot better than I use to be as a kid." You attempt to give him a smile for reassurance.

A friendly smile returned to Papyrus' face. It still amazed you how these skeletons could have such exaggerated face expressions. 

"WELL, HAVE NO FEAR, HUMAN. I WILL DO MY BEST NOT TO MAKE YOU UNCOMFORTABLE. I'M SURE I CAN EVEN HELP YOU GET OVER THIS FEAR!! WE CAN SOLVE PUZZLES TOGETHER AND COOK PASTA AND WATCH SILLY TV SHOWS!!" Papyrus was practically bounding on his heel bones with the thought of all these activities. 

_Whoa. Papyrus was... Well, amazing really._ Not only was he being extremely understanding about your phobia, but he wanted to go out of his way to make you feel more comfortable? You fucking don't get that kinda genuine friendliness. Especially with... _Wait._

You try to not frown again. But he was _still_ holding you captive here. You couldn't just simple ignore that negative side of the situation so easily. 

"Say, that also reminds me..." You clear your throat and carefully mull over your choice of words before continuing, "What could help with this too is if I wasn't being kept in this house all the time. Is there... Any chance you could just... Let me go?"

You're sure you see conflict contort over his skull before he looks down. "WELL, HUMAN. I DID CAPTURE YOU FAIR AND SQUARE."

Shit, was this really just an innocent game to him? Perhaps you could use that to your advantage... And weasel your way out of this?

"Well sure, but... Now what? What happens now that you've captured me?" Let's see how naive he was about this.

Papyrus contemplated again before answering. "UHH… YOU KNOW, I'M NOT ACTUALLY SURE. ALL I KNOW IS KING ASGORE NEEDS SOUL POWER TO HELP FREE ALL OF US FROM THE BARRIER. AND SO I WAS TOLD TO HAND OVER ANY HUMANS I FIND TO HIM OR UNDYNE, THE HEAD OF THE ROYAL GUARD." His bones seem to rattle for a moment. You can't quite tell if this is an excited gesture or worried gesture... But the act does set your hair on end a bit. _Ugghh_ why did skeletons have to give you the creeps...? "AFTER THAT, WE WOULD EVENTUALLY BE ABLE TO GET PAST THE BARRIER AND MONSTERS COULD LIVE ON THE SURFACE!!"

You almost felt bad for this guy. He really was naive about the situation as a whole... But in a way, you kinda admired it. He was blissful and carefree... But at the cost of living a lie almost. You didn't think you had it in your heart to tell what you've heard about the human-capturing business. 

You're about to speak up when Papyrus continues on again. He must have seen the nervous glance in your eyes. "HUMAN, YOU SHOULD NOT BE WORRIED ABOUT YOUR SAFETY. MY BROTHER HAD SUGGESTED I TALKED TO UNDYNE ABOUT ALL THIS FIRST BEFORE I TELL HER ABOUT YOU... I WASN'T REALLY SURE WHAT HE WAS GETTING AT... BUT BOY, AM I GLAD I DID!!! I WENT BY WATERFALL TODAY AFTER MY WORK WAS DONE AND TALKED TO HER ABOUT WHY WE NEEDED HUMANS..." He looks down and fidgets his gloved hands nervously. "HER RESPONSE... WAS KINDA. MURDERY. IT MADE ME A BIT CONCERNED. SHE DIDN'T GO INTO MUCH DETAIL ABOUT WHAT SHE AND ASGORE PLAN TO DO TO USE THE SOUL POWER..." Papyrus suddenly stood up tall again, regaining composure and confidence. "SO! TOMORROW I WILL TALK TO HER MORE ABOUT IT!!"

"Uh... don't you think... she'd get suspicious if you ask a lot of questions?" You didn't like the idea of a violent monster, whoever she was, to come looking for you. Maybe telling Papyrus would be a better idea... He already seemed to get some idea of the picture at large.

"DO NOT WORRY!! I WILL BE STEALTHY SO SHE WILL NOT BE SUSPICIOUS!"

_Yeah, somehow it seemed that wouldn't go over very well..._

"But at the very least, you couldn't let me out…?” You pause, thinking back to your conversation with Sans. "Is it... really that unsafe for me to go out?"

Papyrus shrugs. "I WOULD NOT KNOW. I DON’T KNOW HOW THE MONSTERS OF SNOWDIN WOULD REACT TO YOU. NONETHELESS, YOU CAN’T LEAVE YET HUMAN. I MUST FIRST SPEAK WITH UNDYNE. IF I FOUND OUT THAT HANDING YOU OVER WOULD BE UNSAFE FOR YOU, I WILL LET YOU GO! DEAL??"

_Did you really have much of an option..?_ "Yeah, sure..." You sigh, rubbing your temples. The headache had calmed down for now but you still felt the wild crave gnawing at you from the inside. God, you hoped Sans would find something and get back soon...

_Wait!_ Your bag!! Fuck, where was it?! You had beer in there!

"Hey, did I still have a bag on me when you uh... captured me?" You ask.

"OH YES, I LEFT IT NEXT TO THE COUCH!" He points to one end of the couch, just in the other side of the arm rest. 

You hastily go over to it to, in fact, find your bag resting up against the couch. It looks like it's taken a serious beating since you had first come to this mountain... You reach inside it and pull out one of the wheat beers. Thank God, they were canned, otherwise you were gonna have to find a creative way of getting that bottle cap off. You carefully start to pull the tab open... the can gives an angry hiss. Yep, figures... Those beers were awfully shaken up with all that running and falling and other bullshit. But goddamn, this would help you in the mean time. You finally get it open without causing the carbonation to spill everywhere and start downing the bitter goodness. 

From the kitchen, you notice Papyrus curiously watching you as he continues to prepare a meal. He seems very quizzical about your beverage.

“WHAT IS THAT, HUMAN??” He asks.

You finish the first beer with a satisfying gasp of air. “Ahhh… just a little something to help me feel better in the mean time.” You didn’t really want to get into the details of alcohol and its effects with a naive skeleton… because… let’s face it, what were the chances of such a drug being available down here??

“OH GOOD! AND EATING A BIT OF MY FINE-CRAFTED SPAGHETTI, YOU WILL FEEL SLIGHTLY CLOSER TO 100% BETTER!!!”

You can’t help chuckle. You think you finally figure out what it is about Papyrus’ character that seems familiar and unreal… He’s like… a comic book character, specifically one from young adult action stories you use to read back in the day since your dyslexia made it challenging as fuck to read normal books. 

You carefully pop the tab on the second beer, cursing softly when some of the fizz manages to spill over onto the carpet floor. _You’ll clean it later…_ You start to chug this one too, and stop half way when you feel the familiar swimming sensation overwhelm you. _Oops…_ should have remembered that drinking on an empty stomach was gonna make you feel it faster. But damn, that was fast! You set the can down on the floor and sit there on the couch swaying a bit. The feeling will pass in a second.

The smell of pasta sauce now fills your nose, and suddenly… you think you are hungry enough to eat some. Maybe this batch would be better…? You glance over to see Papyrus dump a shit ton of salt into the sauce pan… _Eeessh… well, maybe not._

“AHH!!” Papyrus declares, as he pulls a spoonful of the sauce away from his open mouth. “THE SAUCE IS FINISHED. NOW THE NOODLES…” he stirs them around in the other boiling pot. “YES!! PERFECT!!! I, THE GREAT MASTER CHEF PAPYRUS, HAVE SUCCEED IN COOKING YET ANOTHER WORK OF CUISINE ART!!”

_If you say so, dude…_ You lean forward on your knees, propping your head up by your wrist. You let the swimmy feeling glide over you again and this time, it feels soothing. The withdrawal symptoms were less potent now. 

“Wait, if you have so much spaghetti already in the fridge, why are you cooking more of it?” You ask.

“FRESH PASTA ALWAYS TASTES BETTER!!” Papyrus states simply.

“Well, sure… but what about the other leftover pasta?”

“I’M SAVING IT FOR MY FOOD MUSEUM!!”

_Your… what?_ You decide not to ask. This is the same guy who apparently took their microwave out into the middle of the woods for some sort of puzzle.

“THERE YOU ARE!!” Papyrus was suddenly standing next to you and had a giant plate of spaghetti outstretched in his gloved hands. 

You take it weakly, trying not to make eye contact. “Thank you.”

You weren’t going to eat it right away, worried about it tasting off again, but the tall skeleton remains standing over you… probably to see what you think. So you twist up a bit of the spaghetti on your fork and take a bite. It was… much more tolerable. But fucking christ, it tasted like it had been soaking in the sea, it was so salty. And the noodles weren’t actually done… they were still pretty chewy.

“It’s great…” You say, forcing a fake smile vaguely in his direction.

“WHOOPEE!! I’M SURE IT’LL HELP YOU FEEL LOADS BETTER.”

“Well… not unless it can heal a cold…” You chuckle softly. 

Papyrus had heard your comment and frown with a confused look. “WHAT IS A COLD EXACTLY??”

“Just a kinda sickness humans get… maybe other monsters too, I dunno. You guys might call it something else.” You take another bite of the spaghetti, trying not to cough.

“CAN I GET YOU ANYTHING ELSE, HUMAN???”

“…water?” A cough manages to escape this time. The fucking salty ass pasta was drying out your mouth.

“CERTAINLY!!” Papyrus darts towards the kitchen again and grabs a cup from the cabinets. With ease, he reaches up to turn on the faucet of the ridiculously tall sink and fills the cup.

“Why the fuck is that sink so tall, anyway?”

Papyrus looks around at you, a look of shock somehow etched into his skull. “DID YOU JUST SAY…”

Oh great, another person who doesn’t like cursing… “I said-“

Papyrus rushes over to you at lightning speed. You squeak a bit in fright, not sure what the motives are in this sudden shift, but then you notice he’s holding a glass jar towards you. This isn’t some jam jar, or a sauce jar… it looks like those large ass pickle jars. Inside it are a few golden coins. 

“What…?” You start, not sure why the hell Papyrus felt the need to show you a huge-ass jar barely full of coins.

“GOLD. IN. NOW.”

“Gold??” 

“YOU SAID A BAD WORD. SO YOU HAVE TO PUT A GOLD COIN IN THE JAR AS YOUR PUNISHMENT!!” Papyrus’ face expression isn’t quite angry or repulsion like how Toriel had reacted to your absurd mouth, but he does have an air of him that is disappointment. Normally, no one could ever make you feel bad for cursing… because you didn’t see why it was so wrong in the first place. But now that a skeleton was shaming you with a ’swear-jar’, you somehow felt a lil upset with yourself.

“Um… but I don’t have any gold…”

Papyrus looks a bit taken a back. “YOU DON’T?? OH. RIGHT. YOU ARE A HUMAN. AND I SUPPOSE IT’S ONLY FAIR TO GIVE YOU A WARNING SINCE YOU DID NOT KNOW ABOUT THE ‘BAD WORD JAR.’ ALRIGHT, I’LL LET YOU OFF FOR NOW.”

_Well shit…_ really had to watch yourself now. But if Papyrus was so gung-ho about no swearing… why was there gold in there to begin with? You thought it might be Sans… perhaps the dude let a few slip loose every now and then.

“ANYWAY… YOU WERE SAYING…??” Papyrus returns the jar from where every he had randomly grabbed it from and hands you your cup of water.

“Oh, I was asking why was the sink so tall.” You take the water and down it quickly.

“AHH, YES. IT’S MY IMPRESSIVE WORK AND IMPROVEMENT! I MADE IT TALLER TO STORE MORE BONES IN IT!!”

“Bones…? Why do you need more bones?”

“THEY ARE MY ATTACKS!!” Papyrus explains. He extends an arm out and opens his hand. Suddenly, a flashing blue bone appears in his hand and he grips it firmly. It’s definitely real. _How the fuck…?!_

“What??” You are amazed for how he was able to just summon that out of thin air. 

“NYEH HEH HEH!! YES, MY ATTACKS ARE BONES!!”

You stare for a moment, watching Papyrus swing the blue bone around. There is a slight, soft hum to its presence and the ever-so-faintest glow. Was it magic? It had to be… much like how Toriel could summon fire.

“WANNA SEE SOMETHING COOL?? THIS ATTACK CAN’T TOUCH YOU IF YOU STAY PERFECTLY STILL! HOLD OUT YOUR ARM.” Papyrus asks.

You hesitate, now much more nervous. His tone of voice sounds confident enough, but you can’t help worrying that he might still hurt you. Slowly, you extend out an arm far enough away from your body. 

You had expected Papyrus to make a dramatic swing with his bone club, but instead, he slowly waves the bone towards your arm. And sure enough, it didn’t hurt you. Actually, it just fucking phases right through you! Almost like a phantom…

“Whooaa…” You gasp, your throat kinda cracking at the end. You cough a bit. “That’s pretty cool.”

“BLUE MAGIC IS LIKE THAT!! IF YOU HOLD STILL, IT CAN’T TOUCH YOU!!”

“So what’s the point of it then?” You ask.

Papyrus opens his jaw for a bit but then closes it, looking rather stumped. “UH… I DON’T KNOW.”

You cough again. You have to brace yourself on the edge of the sofa as your diaphragm spasms a few times. 

Papyrus grimaces from your strange body movements. They must be pretty foreign to him. “HUMAN, YOU SHOULD EAT SOME MORE…” He is looking down at your barely touched spaghetti.

“Yeah… I will…” sighing, you take a few more resentful bites. You know this stuff isn’t going to make a cold go away, but you don’t have the physical strength or patience to argue or explain this to your skeleton-host.

Papyrus fidgets rather obviously as you scarf down the food. “UM… HUMAN… WOULD YOU BE OKAY IF I SAT NEXT TO YOU??”

The emotion you feel just then is the strangest contrast you’ve ever fucking felt before. It was like the fear was screaming warnings at you on one side of your brain and the other was actually touched at how careful Papyrus was being with your comfort levels.

“Sure.” You manage to squeak out, shoving the irrational squirming feeling down.

Papyrus tentatively places himself down on the far opposite side of the couch, clearly trying to give you space. He seems very restless, like he wants to say or do something. Boy, this guy had too much fucking energy built up…

“WHEN I FEEL BAD, MY BROTHER TELLS ME STORIES. SO, HUMAN…. I WOULD LIKE TO TELL YOU SOME STORIES!!”

_Huh… interesting._ “Okay…that would be nice.”

“THIS IS YOUR FIRST TIME IN THE UNDERGROUND, CORRECT??” After you nod an agreement, Papyrus beams excitedly. “AHH!! THEN LET ME TELL YOU A TALE I WAS TOLD AS A BABYBONES!!”

 

…

 

Papyrus shared a peculiar story, one that supposedly took place many, many years ago. You learned quite a few new things about monster customs and biology.

This story was about a great warrior who once fought in the war against humans. The warrior had been wounded in battle and attempted to pass on his training to his children before he ‘fell down.’ 

Falling down was, what you gathered, the monster terminology for dying… but it wasn’t quite the same process that you came to know among humans and animals. A monster would ‘fall down’ but there would still be a few days where they weren’t quite gone. As Papyrus had explained it, monster bodies would still be there and their soul would be barely lingering. Then gradually, their bodies would turn to dust. Once they were fully turned to dust, their soul would finally vanish. It was fascinating shit. Papyrus said this was because most of their biology was based around magic and less physical matter. 

In the end of the story, after the great warrior had turned to dust, his family had taken his dust and scattered it on his books, because that was the one thing he treasured just as much as his family and above fighting in combat; he loved to read and to learn. This was the usual process of monster funerals and to celebrate their passing on… monsters would sprinkle the fallen ones’ dust onto the things they loved.

This didn’t seem too different from what you had known. Some humans had very similar practices… some wished to be cremated into ashes and to be sprinkled in a place they loved or to be kept in an urn so that the family could keep their presence close, even after death.

Part of you had to try and concentrate hard when Papyrus had gotten to the part of the family mourning their lost loved one. You shuddered and had to really mentally force yourself not to think about it… _No… don’t go there._ _You did not want to feel this._

“LATER ON, HIS TWO DAUGHTERS WHO HAD TRAINED UNDER HIM WHEN THEY WERE VERY YOUNG BECAME TWO OF THE STRONGEST WARRIORS IN THE NEXT WAVE OF ROYAL GUARDS!! THEY WORKED HARD TO MAKE THEIR FATHER PROUD!!!” Papyrus concluded with a smug smile. He must have been dying to tell this tale to someone, for he had made quite the dramatic act as he explained the story and voiced the different dialogues.

“Interesting tale,” You comment after he finishes.

“OF COURSE, THERE IS ANOTHER VERSION THAT I’VE ONCE HEAR… OH, SANS!!”

You turn to see the smaller skeleton standing across the room. You hadn’t heard the door open… _how fucking long was he standing there…?_ You try not to stare him down.

“*sup you two. sharing tales?”

“AH YES!! I WAS JUST TELLING THE HUMAN ABOUT A STORY OF THE MONSTER AND HUMAN WAR! WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG??” You can hear some irritation in Papyrus’ tone. Nothing too hostile, just your typical brotherly way of nagging, you supposed.

Sans doesn’t even seemed to mind. He just winks and holds up a small paper bag. “*sorry. it took the shop down the way to go through all their old human junk to see if they had anything to help our friend out. they didn’t have much… so i went to garbage dump and poked around for more. i found these.”

Sans reached into the bag and pulled out a pill bottle. The bottle looked worn as shit, and probably just as fucking old. 

“Is that…?” You reach out and take the bottle from him. Turning it over in your hands and squinting at the worn type on the label, you conclude that its a ‘expired’ bottle of aspirin. “Holy sh-“ you manage to stop yourself when you feel Papyrus’ eye sockets bugging out and shooting you a warning look. “I mean… wow, this is really old.” The date appeared to say that the expiration was “5.15.19X6”. That was… fuck, your head hurt too much to do the math.

“*sorry, that was all I could find. i grabbed this from the shop in town too.” sans pulled another bottle out of the bad. It was in a funny looking glass bottle, almost reminded you of those chemistry tubes. There was a very neon shine to the liquid inside of it. Looked sci-fi as fuck.

“What is it?” You ask, this time not reaching out for it. You felt a bit skeptical.

“*its a home remedy that the bunbun family had in stock. just a brew to help clear the mind. it’s something used for monsters so i don’t know if it will have any effect on you. but it can’t hurt, right?” He gave you another wink.

“I dunno, can it?” You frown. If it was magic, who knew what it would do to a human.

“*i got it just in case you wanted to try it, but you don’t have to if you don’t wanna.” Sans returned the bottle to the bag and set it on the low, dining table. “*just know that it’s there if ya need it.”

“Thanks, man.” You look back to the aspirin bottle. You knew medicine never really expired, it just got weaker and weaker the older it was. You wish you knew how to determine how many pills you would need to take in order to get a proper effect from how ancient this shit was. But that was just considering the medicine as a whole… would the caffeine in it expire at all? You didn’t fucking know… you weren’t that great in chemistry or any science classes in school. You’ll think about it… and in the meantime, let the buzz of your beer do its thing for you.

“OH WOWIE, LOOK AT THE TIME!!” Papyrus shouted out loud, looking at no clock in particular… how the hell did he know what the time was? “SANS, WE BOTH HAVE A FULL DAYS WORTH OF WORK TOMORROW!! NOT TO MENTION, I STILL HAVE TO GO BY UNDYNE’S PLACE TOMORROW… WE SHOULD GET SOME REST!!”

“*sure thing, bro. what is the plan with undyne tomorrow?”

You felt your gut tighten a bit as you looked back to Papyrus. He had told you already a vague plan of what he was going to do, but… you wondered if he would change his mind.

“WELL, SANS, I MADE A DEAL WITH THE HUMAN!! I WOULD CLEVERLY FIGURE OUT IF UNDYNE HAS ANY BAD INTENTIONS FOR OUR GUEST… AND IF SHE DOES, I WON’T TURN THE HUMAN OVER!! THAT’S THE PLAN!!” Papyrus stood up from his place on the couch and posed dramatically. “I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, WILL FIGURE THIS OUT!! NYEH HEH HEH!!”

You try so fucking hard not to roll your eyes. The guy still at least seemed to keep true to his good intentions. God, you fucking hope it wasn’t just all an act… _Don’t be lulled into a false sense of security…_

“HUMAN, DO YOU NEED ANYTHING ELSE?? MORE FOOD??”

“Water…” You ask, feeling your body wanting to sway a bit. The buzz felt very nice now. The caffeine nag in the back of your head had become so faint, it was easy to ignore. But damn, you still literally needed water to survive. And you couldn’t remember the last time you had some, prior to drinking a small, one glass moments ago.

“OH THAT’S RIGHT! HUMANS ARE MADE UP MOSTLY OF WATER, AREN’T THEY??” Papyrus looked so excited to have remembered this little fact. He turned to his brother eagerly.

“*yep, that’s right.” Sans said nonchalantly. 

“How do you guys know that?” You ask.

“SIMPLE!! SCHOOL!!” Papyrus declared. “ONE SECOND, HUMAN, I CAN GET YOU SOME WATER!” Papyrus quickly went back into the kitchen and fetched a glass of water from the ridiculously tall sink. He handed it to you and you began to down it greedily. The moment you took the first sip, you realized how badly you needed that. One glass wasn't enough, especially if you were getting sick. Hopefully two would do.

“Thanks…” You mumbled, closing your eyes for a moment. 

“NO PROBLEM!! GOOD NIGHT, BROTHER! GOOD NIGHT, HUMAN!!” Papyrus, without much more warning, raced up the stairs and into the room covered in signs and pictures.

“He sure has to be enthusiastic about everything, huh…?” You sigh, smiling a bit.

“*it’s not that he has to… he just is.” Sans says, grinning up at his brother’s door. “*man, isn’t my brother cool?”

The question kinda took you off guard. You look back over at the shorter skeleton, questionably. You couldn’t tell if this was a normal comment that he would make about his brother from time to time, or you were seeing a rare affectionate moment between the siblings. It jerked you a bit… it made you think of Jack.

“Yeah… I suppose so.” You lay your head back down on the couch now that the space was free again. You definitely needed more rest if you were gonna fight off this cold that was hanging over you.

“*feeling any better?”

“Yeah a bit… I had beer in my bag. It’ll help for now, but my body will probably hate me for it tomorrow.” You grumble. It was the truth. But you never seem to learn… you still manage to drink when you’re sick and regret it the next day.

“*get some sleep, buddy. i guarantee things will be worked out between pap and undyne tomorrow. you have nothing to worry about.” Sans gives you one last reassuring wink.

“Really?” You ask weakly. “What about the other monsters? Will it really be okay for me to be out in the open?”

“*one step at a time, bucko. i would be careful, either way. who knows how many of the locals could recognize a human.” Sans pauses. “but don’t worry, i’ll keep an eye-socket out for you.”

Before you can say anymore, he’s gone in another blink of the eye.

You shudder. You hated that he could do that. “We’ll fucking see…” You whisper. 

The house had become dark and still so suddenly. But you were thankful for that. It would make drifting off a lot fucking easier. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is based on the song Take Warning by Operation Ivy.


	10. Your Phone’s Off The Hook, But You’re Not

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Sans decides he will learn trombone... for the sake of having one more bone pun to make.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kinda a short chapter, but it's gonna help with character development n what not. :) Plus a little fan-made back story. Enjoy.

_Fucking jesus christ, your throat!_

You woke early the next morning to your throat on fire. It hurt much worse than last night. You can barely make it off the couch without going off in a fit of coughing. Each one burned. Shit, you wanted to grumble and curse so much but honestly, that would only make the pain in your throat worse… So instead, you drag your feet to the kitchen again. 

You squint irritably up at the sink. _Fuck this shit…_ You were gonna have to climb it. You make one decent first attempt, but loose your grip and fall on your ass. 

“Son-of-a… fucking shit _fuck face_ …” You try to keep your angry mumbling quiet… incase Papyrus is awake and hears you.

The second attempt is successful. You manage to get a good grip on the lip of the sink bowl and hoist yourself up. Roof climbing really came in handy. Even with weak muscles from an illness, you still managed to scale this bullshit. You shove your face under the faucet and turn it on. You give no fucking _shits_ if you look ridiculous just lapping up the water like some kind of animal. You wanted to drink _a lot_ of water… more than a cup would hold and so fuck getting a glass and filling it up multiple times. Besides, the cool water feels great on your warm face.

_Warm… more like hot._ Maybe you had a fever now. It was fighting the cold for you. Good fucking thing Sans found you some aspirin.

After getting your fill, you smack your lips a few times and swallow your throat to see how it feels now. Not great… but better. You climb back down and stand in the kitchen for a second. Yeah, you felt sick alright. You could tell from the clammy way your skin felt and the heavy weighing in the back of your head. And you felt very fucking warm…. you could feel sweat slightly building up under your clothes. _Gross…_ It’s a shame these skeletons didn’t have a bathroom of any kind. You weren’t going to be able to take a shower or bath. Oh well… you could live without hygiene… at least for a while.

“Wonder what time it is…” You mumble. 

Time. That must be different down here too without a sun. You wondered what a sleeping and waking schedule was like for these monsters. Were they still asleep right now?

You walk back into the living room and glance up at the two bedroom doors upstairs. The house was quiet. Either they were still asleep or out… no way, those two boneheads could be this quiet.

_Wow, look… you made your first pun. Great._

You notice a new note on the entrance door out of the corner of your eye. You walk up to it and give it a read:

_“HUMAN._

_SANS AND I HAVE WORK TODAY, SO MAKE YOURSELF AT HOME._

_HERE’S MY NUMBER IN CASE YOU NEED ANYTHING.”_

Sure enough, there was a phone number listed on the note too. You frown. How the hell was that suppose to work? Okay, you knew monsters had their own phones, but how were you gonna call them if your phone had no service? Did they have some sort of special tower or magic wave bullshit that let them call each other on ancient human technology?

You sighed and thump your head against the wall. _Too much shit you didn’t understand down here._

You glance at the note again to see some extra, smaller text scribbled at the bottom:

_“ONLY USE THIS NUMBER PLATONICALLY. THANK YOU.”_

You rolled your eyes. _Ha… sure, dude. Whatever._

You pull the note off the door and take it back with you to the couch. You swipe up your bag again and dig your phone out of it to punch in Papyrus’s number. Well… might as well try this, yeah? With some difficulty through the cracked screen, you generate a text that says ‘are you getting this?’ and send it to Papyrus’s number. If somehow, your phone can pick up some other cellular system down here, it’ll work. If not… well, guess you just won’t be hearing from him. But now you had his number on you. You could always try another phone maybe if need be. You glance around the house again, and honestly you aren’t surprised to see that there is no landline or other phone visibly out.

You tuck your phone into your hoodie’s pocket and give your throat another clearing grumble. Alright, now what? What the fuck were you suppose to do here to entertain yourself? They’re house was desolate. They had a TV but you wondered if it actually worked… You sit up with a grunt and grope around for the power button on its side. But oh, of course… it’s such an old human version of a TV that the power switch is still a large, circular button on the very front in the bottom right corner. You give it a tap.

_*’STAY TUNED FOR MORE MTT PROGRAMS! STAY TUNED FOR MORE MTT PROGRAMS! STAY TUNED FOR MORE-‘_

The voice only keeps repeating this over and over in the most stereotypical announcer tone… and it’s just so obnoxious, you don’t even give yourself the chance to see if there are any other channels available. The TV is switched off immediately. _Fuck it._ You were never much for the boob-tube anyway.

A sniff escapes you. You know it’s your mind wanting to break down and cry again, but you won’t let it. Not yet. You felt the need to make some progress with your current situation before you’d let your guard down again. Let’s find something else to poke around at.

It’s unfortunate to see that there are not that many books in the living room space… you pick up a joke book that’s sitting on the end table near the couch. Figures… Just for kicks you decide to take a look see. It’s probably full of puns more awful than the shit Sans was spewing. _Nope._ There’s a quantum physics book inside of it? You raise a brow and give another small cough. Interesting. You set the joke book down to take a look at the physics book…. but, to your annoyed disappointment, there is another joke book inside of it… _Seriously?_ You open that one up and for GOD FUCKING SAKES there’s another quantum physics book… one almost identical to the first one. 

Did that short-ass skeleton manage to pull your leg without even being here? Jeeeeesus….

You groan angrily and slam the books back down on the table. You thought about putting them back how they were so that Sans couldn’t see you got gagged, but you really don’t give enough of a shit.

A buzz goes off in your pocket. _Oh._ You snatch out your phone hastily and squint at the fucked up screen. 

“Holy shit!” The texting down here works?? Papyrus had messaged you back.

His message read, ‘YES! WHATS UP!’

He wrote in all caps? _Wonderful…_

You respond with, ‘Nothing, just checking to make sure my phone works.’

After sending it, your heart starts to hammer. Your phone texting was working… you somehow picked up some sort of signal down here. Did that mean…

You open a new message and address it to Andrew. You bite your lip, fighting back the rush of hope and worry all in one. 

‘Andrew, if you are getting this, I need help. I’m trapped under Mt. Ebott.’

You pause. There was so much you wanted to say if you could… so, so, SO much. But you hit the send button and just pray that your phone can send it.

But instantly… your phone returns an auto message reading: ‘MSG: Not delivered’

You try again. But, it failed to send.

“Fuck….. FUCK!” You let that small surge of rage out. Just enough to keep you sane. You breathe deeply for a moment but another buzz from your phone startles you again.

‘DOES IT WORK?’

It’s Papyrus. No SHIT it works. But you don’t respond.

Okay, cool… so you can text monster phones underground but still can’t alert anyone on the surface. Doesn’t change this situation much, does it?

Your phone buzzes again. What the fuck do you want, Papyrus! 

But it’s not Papyrus. Your phone doesn’t recognize the number. For a moment, you have small hope that its a human trying to get ahold of you… but then you read the actual message.

*’is the fridge running?’

_…What?_

‘Who is this?’ you text back.

The response is so fast, it’s alarming. *’please, this is a serious manner. you could be in danger. is the fridge in the house still running?’

You first look out the window to see if someone is looking in and sees you. The windows don’t reveal anyone… just foggy white from the contrast of warm and cold air on either sides of the glass. Then you glance in the kitchen. The fridge was quite obviously plugged in to the wall and there was a hum of electricity purring from it.

‘Yes?’ you text back. 

*’then you better go catch it.’

You stare in disbelief at your phone. 

“YOU MOTHERFUCKER!!” You are sweltering now. It’s that goddamn Sans, and you know it! He fucking pranked you again and your patience are already gone. “I swear to fucking _CHRIST_ I’ll… I’LL-“

Your phone alerts you again of a text. *’you’ll wat?’

“FUCK!!” You practically throw your phone out of your hands. Your eyes madly look around. Are there cameras in here? Is he in here? Did he fucking teleport again?! “Are you watching me, you ASSHOLE??”

No response. 

You run up the stairs and attempt to open what you assume is his room. It’s still locked. You bang on it rapidly. No response.

“Don’t fucking pretend you aren’t here! I know you are!! You have to be!” Unless he’s already teleported out again.

You think you hear your phone buzz again downstairs. You huff a few times, still steaming. This fucking skeleton… now it seems he scares you less and more just triggers frustration. You glance around the ceiling one more time for any sight of a camera, or microphone or anything. But nothing you can see. Could be magic… the answer for now on was probably magic. Grumbling loudly, you walk back downstairs and look at the new message you got.

*’just keepin you on your toes.’

_Oh, fucking really?_ You don’t think you’ll respond. You were never one to feed the troll who is fucking with you. But this fucking guy… he was watching you… _somehow_. And that didn’t settle well in your gut. When he said he’d keep an eye-socket out, he was being too fucking literal.

You shove the phone in your pocket and to your relief, it doesn’t go off again. You glance around nervously. If he’s watching you, you felt weird poking around more. So you decide to heat up some food.

The fridge seems to really only contain stale chips and Papyrus’s gross-ass ’food museum’ of pasta. There is no telling how old any of it was… you only hoped there was leftovers from last night. You could tolerate that.

You take out the top container on the stack of several. Opening it and giving it a sniff determines it hasn’t gone bad, at least. In the process of scooping some out in a sauce pan, your phone goes off again. Who could that _possibly_ fucking be…? You ignore it for now.

You ignite the top of the stove with a dial and begin to heat up the pasta. It doesn’t take long for the rich smell of tomato sauce to fill the space. Still smelled alright, thank God. Your phone buzzes again.

“Why the fuck you messaging me so much.” You growl.

*’feel free to use anything in the house.’

*’like pap said, make yourself at home.’

You turn off your phone. No more from the prankster skeleton. You were just gonna try and tolerate this meal and find something else to entertain yourself. You weren’t really sure why he pushed your buttons so easily, but he fucking did. _He’s trying to be nice though…_ Yeah, well he’s still pissing you the fuck off. You poke at the pasta in the sauce pan and decide it’s done. Maybe you were being too bitter. That was probably because you still were under a HEAP of stress of being homesick, captive, sick and _hmmm…_ yeah depression was in there, even though you didn’t like to acknowledge it at the moment.

The pasta splats into a bowl and you pick at it with a fork. Tastes about the same as yesterday. Salty as shit. You glance around in the cabinets for something that could possibly help with that… Garlic powder? Nah… that probably wouldn’t help… _Oh wait!_ On the tips of your toes, you spot a sealed jar of pasta sauce. You grab it, pop that sucker open and pour a good amount onto your plate. After giving that a stir and another taste test, it turns out to be pretty alright.

“Well, if I’m making myself at home, I’ll take what I can.” You hum a bit to yourself. Too bad there wasn’t any parmesan cheese anywhere…

After you eat up, you think you’ll poke around in that closet upstairs. Maybe the skeleton brothers will have some boardgames or a deck of cards you can dick around with. God, even if they had other books or… instruments… that would be fucking excellent.

That thought triggers a melody. Immediately the vision of Josh’s room at your place comes to mind. You, Josh and Andrew would spend many weekends in there jamming, trying to write your own songs… it was a dream of your’s to be in a band with your friends. You were all not too shabby of musicians so you had a decent shot at it. Andrew could play some sick chords on the guitar and bass… Josh was a master of the drums… and you… you had a knack for the trumpet. That’s right, that meant you were a ska punk geek and a damn proud one at that. You loved the sound of a brass instrument. Too fucking bad you wouldn’t be able to play your horn for a while…. if not…. ever again.

You can’t help but frown. Wow, with so much missing in your life, you take even the little things for granted. Now some good ol’ Streetlight Manifesto or The Specials sounded good right about now. Ska always cured you of your blues. You take your phone back out and give it a thoughtful stare. You had no way of charging it… you might not wanna waste its power on playing music.

You finish the last bite of the pasta and set the dirty dishes aside. You’ll worry about cleaning it later when you feel like scaling that fucking sink again. Oh and before you forget… you snatch up that bottle of aspirin and give it another look. Let’s say… 4 pills for now… see how that fairs your symptoms. You swallow the pills dry.

Upstairs, you approach the closet door again and take a peek inside. You are greeted again with what looks like just boxes and old coats. There was no top shelf that could be hiding any books or board games. Perhaps the boxes had some interesting things inside?

You take some time to pull out a few of the boxes and look inside them. One was full of binders… and those were full of strange equations and theories. None of it makes any sense to you… your interest as to why those two skeletons had them was there for a moment…. but then you ditched the thought the moment it started to bore you. Another box was full of even more clothes. Some looked rather small… you guessed this could have been the skeletons’ clothes when they were young? Maybe… Your mind screamed a scary thought at you. _It could be clothes from some of those missing children._ You quivered and immediately pushed that thought from your mind. Seemed a bit ridiculous anyway…. why the fuck would they have held onto those clothes? What would be the point? Opening the last of the boxes you pulled out revealed hundreds of action figures. You smirked at them and took a few out to get a closer look. You didn’t recognize any of them… so you guessed they were based off of characters from monster stories. Your finger traced over a werewolf looking character as you admired the craftsmanship of the toy. Could it have possibly been hand carved? It looked like it…. Shit, that must be nice to have access to figurines that were hand made with care rather than mass-produced in a slave-driven factory from China… 

You gasp. Your eye had caught sight to something in the closet which made you drop the toy back in the box. 

_Could it be….?_

You wedge yourself between the other boxes in the closet to get into the side space. There were cases…. and not just any kind…. they looked like instrument cases. Your heart was fluttering. One huge one and two small ones. You pull all three of them out. The anticipation is killing you, but you decide to open the large one first. The clasps were kinda rusty but you manage to pull it open, revealing… a trombone! 

“Ohhh…” You gasp with delight. It looked old as hell and needed serious cleaning… but it was beautiful. Oh, was it a fucking beautiful sight to see! You take a moment to wipe a layer of smudge off of it’s slide. Then, hastily, you turn your attention to the small cases. You flip one of them open. A saxophone! You are grinning from ear to ear. Just the kind of instrument you always wanted to learn. Those reed instruments were tricky to adjust to when you have played brass all your life. And finally…. your heart hammers as you open the third one.

“Oh FUCK yes!!” There it was. A trumpet!!! You practically yank the horn out of its case and caress it with joy. The amount of excitement you felt to have found an instrument you loved in this fucking skeletal house was indescribable. 

“I bet you need a bath…” You mumbled more to yourself as you inspected its condition. It, like the trombone (and you guessed the saxophone, too) had a layer of dirt on it. You tested its valves and unfortunately, were very sticky. Yep, definitely needed a bath. Usually, you cleaned yours with a special solution, but if the skeletons at least had dish soap, that could do the trick. But other than that, there were no visible dents on it. The mouth piece looked a bit chewed up, but you bet you could still make a good sound on it. Okay, now you definitely had an excuse to scale that god-awful sink.

…

After managing to hoist each instrument up one at a time and let them soak under the water with some soap (which you found under the sink), both the two brass instruments had been cleaned. You decided to leave the sax alone for now since you didn’t know how to properly clean that one with its delicate paper pads on its keys. You couldn’t find any towels anywhere so you used your hoodie to pat dry down the trombone and the trumpet. Then, leaving the trombone to dry on the counter, you immediately began to test around with the trumpet. Oh, how hearing that brilliant sound in your ears filled you with… well… it made you happy. You played a few scales to warm up and then began to play a few parts you knew from Streetlight Manifesto’s song Sick and Sad.

“*sup?”

You at first don’t hear the low, chill voice over your playing. Then, you stop and turn to see Sans standing in the kitchen. _Of course, he appears out of no where again…._

“I cleaned up your instruments. And just giving the trumpet a play.”

Sans watches for a moment as you conclude the song you were playing. Just for kicks since you had a watching audience, you exaggerate the last long note with a strong vibrato. Really, you couldn’t help showing off…

“*not bad, bucko. guess you have experience with that thing?”

“Yeh, man. I’ve been playing it for several years now. It’s definitely my favorite.” You play with the valves instinctually. “Do you play at all?”

“*nah.” Sans says simple. He passes you to pull the half eaten chip bag out of the fridge.

“So why do you have so many instruments then?”

“*i found them one day in the garbage dump. they must have come from the human world on the surface. i knew they were instruments because i had seen them referenced in books.” Sans munches on some of the chips while his back is still towards you. “*i thought it might be fun to try and learn with papyrus but…. never really got around to it. they’ve just been living in our closet ever since.” Sans returned the chips to the fridge and turns towards you with a wide grin. “*good to see that someone is appreciating them.”

“You have no idea.” You say, smiling down at the trumpet in your hands. “I’ve always wanted to play professionally. I’m actually not so bad at the trombone, either…” You gesture your head to it laying on the counter. “But the trumpet is my preferred choice.”

Sans eyes seem to flash eagerly for a second. You aren’t really sure how the fuck they do that… since his pupils seem to be nothing but tiny dots of light in his dark eye-sockets… but you think you see them glow brighter for just a second.

“*if that’s the case… can you teach me?”

“Huh?” You are kinda taken a back.

“*will you teach me how to play trombone? after all…” You frown immediately, even before he can make the awful pun you are anticipating. “*shouldn’t a skeleton know all the kinds of **bones** they can?” He chuckles, completely proud with himself.

“I suppose I could…” You sigh, not acknowledging his awful joke. “I’ve never taught anyone how to play an instrument before…”

“*it could be fun…” Sans winks and gives a playful shrug. “*besides… it’ll give you something to do while you wait around here.”

“Wha? You mean, you want me to start teaching you right now?”

“*sure, why not?”

“Don’t you have work?” suddenly you feel nervous about teaching this skeleton how to play brass, and you’re desperate for an excuse.

“*i’m on break.” He smirks.

You roll your eyes. “Okay, fine then… uh…. let’s try starting with something simple.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's title is named after the song Your Phone’s Off The Hook, But You’re Not by X.


	11. If I Play What They Want You To Hear

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The vague plan is made.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for another slow one, guys. Just having some fun with this one. Things are gonna speed up a bit hopefully by the next chapter... still just trying to lay some foundation.  
> Also, warning for the annoying amounts of music talk. I'm a fucking dork. Eat me.

“Say, man… that sounds pretty good!”

Despite the fact that this squatty skeleton claims to be a lazy pile of bones, he seems to be a fast learner to the trombone. Maybe the fact that you told him what the instrument is called has to do with it; he just had to get good at it to incorporate it in his endless list of ‘bone’ puns. But really, Sans had the hang of the instrument.

You had to readjust to the trombone yourself… it had been a while, after all, since you’ve really played. Teaching an instrument you weren’t completely comfortable with was fucking hard. But you were managing, according to Sans.

You started teaching him to play a concert ‘F’ pitch. For trombone… that was a ‘D’ and for you on trumpet, you played a ‘G’. You gave Sans sometime adjusting to the instrument and to matching pitches. Went pretty fucking smoothly… the dude was a natural. His sound on the mouth piece was way better than yours when you first started. And that was saying something, the guy didn’t even have lips (it was still a mystery to you how he was able to get the instrument to play correctly because of this). Once he felt comfortable with that, you practiced some scales. That took a bit longer, since you had to pause each time to show the position of each note on the trombone’s slide. And of course, you got a few of them wrong the first few times, so you had to trial and error it.

You both took a break after a while to relax your lungs and face… and you managed to get most of the coughing fit out of you after playing… but you felt like the aspirin was already doing wonders for your symptoms. 

For lunch, you both ate the last of Papyrus’ salty spaghetti. You showed Sans what you did earlier to make the sauce more bearable. He never verbally admitted that it made it better, but he seemed to silently appreciate it. He was genuinely too nice to his brother, it seemed, even behind his back.

After about an hour of practicing the brass part to the song ‘Sell Out’ by Reel Big Fish at different tempos, he managed to follow along with your lead on trumpet. He could play the opening part pretty fucking well. It was a good song to start off with, after all… being full of repetitive, easier notes. _Wait until he gets good enough to take on Streetlight Manifesto songs…. oooohhh, those would be nice to play with someone._ You were thinking a bit too ahead. You should expect this to be just a one time thing to pass the time… would Sans really keep up the practice? Who fucking knows…

“*this is actually pretty fun.” he commented, moving the trombone’s slide up and down to test how loose it still was.

“I know, right? I fucking love brass instruments, they are so fun to jam with.” You too toyed with the valves on your instrument. Even as a beginner, Sans was already adopting the fidgety hands of a brass player… even when not playing and you were holding your instrument, you felt the need to jostle with the keys/slide.

“*what did you call that genre we were just playing?”

“It’s ska. Well… that song is technically ska punk. See, ska tends to be more mellow and happy-go-luck, yeh? And then when it’s ska punk, it’s the same chords and instrumentals of ska, but the aggressive tempo of punk. Sometimes you can mix the two’s chord progressions… but honestly, there aren’t that many decent ska punk bands out there.” A heavy sigh escapes your lips. “It’s a shame… it’s my favorite. And yet, not a lot of variety to pull from for inspiration.”

“*i take it when you wanted to play professionally-“

“I wanted to be in a ska punk band, yeah exactly.” You finish for him. He chuckled at your enthusiasm but you shrugged it off. This was the kinda shit you could talk about and get really pumped. You weren’t gonna let any one tease you about it.

“*you probably still could.” Sans commented, gazing up at nothing in particular.

“Oh yeah? You think I have a chance of escaping this mountain, even though you guys have been trapped down here for years?” You meant for it to sound playful, like a joke… but you were no good at that. You feel like the comment might have stung Sans a bit… but damn he was good at hiding it. You could only tell it bothered him from the slight shake at the corner of his toothy smile. That split second of the false grin faltering…

“*who knows…” he murmured.

To be honest, the comment actually hurt even yourself being admitted out loud. You didn’t like the idea of giving up hope so soon… you definitely wanted to be home again. You still had friends there that cared… on some level… at the very least, you still had Andrew. But what were the actual chances of getting out? You had no idea where to begin… you barely knew this world… you didn’t even know if there was a convenient place to access the barrier. And when you got to the barrier… what then? Toriel said anything with a soul can’t go through it… But Papyrus said something about the king using soul power to break it? The information felt very fuzzy… you weren’t sure if that meant there was a way out or not… at least… not involving _dying_.

“*i find that humans are full of endless possibilities.” Sans perks up, lightening the mood.

“Huh. How would you know?” Even if he had seen the human children, that surely wasn’t enough to make a solid conclusion about all of humanity.

“*i’ve done research.” He says simply. Before you can comment on this further, Sans starts the ‘Sell Out’ song over again alone. You decide he wasn’t going to say much more anyway. So you simply listen and admire how much he’s progressed in such a short period of time. How much time had they spent on this… 3 hours? Maybe 4?

“It’s good to see you picking up the instrument so fast.” You comment.

“*and it’s good to see you comfortable around me.” Sans says after finishing the only part that he has learned.

“Huh?” You were taken a back.

“*you seem fine now. earlier, you were definitely spooked by me.” He gives you a friendly wink.

“Well, I…” You hated having to explain this again.

“*i gotcha, pal. pap told me. see? we’re both helpin’ each other out.” His smile feels genuine for once.

You smirk a bit. “Yeah, I ‘spose so.” But he was right. You hadn’t felt that nagging fear for a while now that you had been sitting with him and teaching him to play an instrument. It felt rather refreshing to sit back and consider this. You swear, if you make it back home, you would tell Andrew and Josh exactly this: ‘Hey fuckers! I managed to teach a walking, talking skeleton how to play trombone. And I wasn’t even fucking scared!’ You grin hopefully at this fictional thought.

“*what’s so funny?” Sans ask curiously.

“Ah nothing, just thinking how my friends would react if they could see me now. They’d be astonished, but also probably proud.” You admit.

“*hey, you did good today, buddy.” He offers his boney fist up to you.

“We both did.” You fist bump him in agreence.

…

Alright. So Sans wasn’t _all_ bad. Sure he knew how to trigger your temper on a dime. But deep down the guy was nice and thoughtful like his brother. He just didn’t like to flaunt it as much as Papyrus did.

“So have you even heard a punk song from the human world?”

“*probably. watched a few older human films. they’ve mentioned punks here and there.”

“Well okay, but punk culture and music are almost separate things. Punks tend to be a group of people who stand against a corrupt system or idea. The music is its own genre which tends to promote these ways of being. Or at the very least sing about real life issues in absurd ways to get people’s attention.”

“*so, offensive? cursing and violence?”

“Sure. More than that actually… lots of bands sing about inequality, modern slavery, rape, the rich killing the poor…” you could go on.

“*huh.”

You can’t tell if this is making any kind of good or bad impact on Sans. For one, you didn’t expect him to get all of this, since he lived in a completely different society than your own. Who knew if monsters had a fairer social, economical and governmental system down here? But you were eager to see if you could get him into the music. You loved sharing your passion for the music style at the very least. You’d start him off easy… with ska punk of course, since he liked the trombone. _Let’s introduce him to the more sarcastic sides of punk first, before he tries out the hardcore shit._

“I wish I could show you some actual music on my phone, but…” You pull the broken brick out of your pocket and sigh. “I shouldn’t waste its power… in case of an emergency.”

“*mind if i take a look at it?” Sans asks, holding out his hand.

You hand him the phone. He proceeds to look it over, observing its plug-in ports. “*haven’t see this kind before… is it new?”

“Newish. I’ve had it for 3 years now.”

“*yep, that’s new for what we normally get down here.” Sans winks at you. “*takes a long time for your landfill to reach ours.”

He looks back down at your phone. He seems to be thinking… “*i’ll tell you what…” he hands the phone back to you. “*if you let me borrow it at some point, i can take it to somebody who could modify one of our phone chargers to be capable with it. that way you can charge it and have your music.”

“You’re serious?” You ask, eyes wide with hope.

“*nah, not normally.” he chuckles. “*but this time, yes.”

“That would be great! Hell, I have more than just music I could show you on there. I’ve got pictures and videos that could help me show you more about the punk culture.”

“*sounds like fun.” Sans comments with a lazy shrug.

That moment, the door bursts open and the cold snow blusters in. Papyrus shovels in with arms full of what looks like grocery bags.

“SANS!! YOU LAZYBONES!!” He sets the bags down on the table and faces his brother, hands on his hip bones. “YOU WEREN’T AT YOUR STATION THE MAJORITY OF THE DAY!! WHAT WERE YOU EVEN DOING??”

“*learning to play trombone.” Sans says, smiling up at his brother.

“UGH!! IS THAT SUPPOSE TO BE ANOTHER JOKE???”

You can’t help but giggle a bit.

“*nah, that’s just what it’s called.” Sans says, grinning widely. “*me n’ the human were playin’ some tunes.”

“TUNES??” Papyrus’ eye sockets seem to sparkle (even though it seemed physically impossible, but hey, _magic_ ). “THAT… THAT SOUNDS LIKE FUN. CAN I JOIN??”

“*sure, pap. we have a third instrument.” Sans turns back to you, looking hopeful.

You feel bad to crush this dream of a dynamic duo. “Uh… I actually don’t know how to play the saxophone. It’s completely different than trumpet and trombone.” Instantly, Papyrus’ cheery grin starts to droop. “Uh! I mean, hey, we can still try and figure it out together! I’ve always wanted to learn it.”

“WOWIE!! THIS WILL BE GREAT! I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, WILL BECOME THE BEST AT… WHAT DID YOU CALL IT AGAIN??”

“Uh, saxophone.”

“SAXOPHONE!! I WILL BE THE BEST!! NYEH HEH HEHHH!!” Papyrus holds up a dramatic fist for a moment. After no verbal regards from either yourself and Sans, he makes a sound like the clearing of his throat. “ANYWAY… I WENT AND GOT MORE GROCERIES!! I KNEW IT WAS ABOUT TIME TO GET MORE FOOD, ESPECIALLY SINCE WE HAVE ANOTHER MOUTH TO FEED!!”

You feel like guilt became a real living thing and just punted you in the gut. Alright, so yes, they were keeping you ‘captive’ here. But your pride still got the better of you. Of all the things you couldn’t stand, it was someone taking care of you and providing for you because you had no money, no food,  _nothing_.

“You didn’t have to do that…” You start, clenching your jaw. “I could… I dunno… chip in for the cost??” But how the _fuck_ would you do that? Seemed gold was their currency. And you weren’t exactly loaded with the stuff, were you? You wondered if your human currency would be worth anything down here…

“NONSENSE, HUMAN!! YOU ARE OUR GUEST FOR AS LONG AS YOU WANT!!” You give Papyrus a quizzical look and he brightens up again. “OH THAT REMINDS ME. I DID TALK TO UNDYNE AGAIN. AND WELL….” He sighs, looking rather upset with himself. “HER INTENSIONS TOWARDS ANY HUMANS IS NOT GOOD… NOT GOOD AT ALL. I FEEL BAD FOR HAVE CAPTURING YOU AND MAKING YOU WAIT HERE…” He looks back up and plasters another big smile on his skull. “SO IT LOOKS LIKE YOU ARE GOOD TO GO!! HOWEVER… I MUST WARN YOU. I DON’T RECOMMEND LEAVING THIS HOUSE UNTIL LATER TOMORROW… UNDYNE WILL BE COMING THROUGH TO DO A DAILY REPORT WITH THE OTHER SENTRIES. IT’S BEST IF YOU STAY HIDDEN. BUT DON’T WORRY!! WE WILL KEEP YOU SAFE!!”

“*yeah and in the meantime, we can jam more.” Sans says grinning.

“So…” You feel thrilled but anxious all at once. “I’m free to go whenever?”

“OF COURSE!! WE HAD A DEAL!!”

“…Thank you…” If it weren’t for the fear still lingering there, you would have hugged Papyrus for keeping to his word. So far, Toriel seemed to have been proven wrong; most of the monsters down here were quick to show you compassion rather than violence. Goddamn, you were thankful for that.

“*what is your plan, then?” Sans asks.

“Uh…” God, you didn’t know. You didn’t know what was passed this and you didn’t know where you needed to be. You stare blankly after Papyrus as he grabs up all the grocery bags and takes them to the kitchen. “I guess I’d like to try and go home but…. is that even possible?”

Sans shrugs. “*sure it is. but will it be easy?” he sighs. “*definitely not. but hey… you humans have determination.”

“Yeah, I guess so… but what good is that gonna do if I run into some like this Undyne person?”

“*a lot. believe me.” He gives you a reassuring wink. You feel like he’s implying something, but you’re not really sure what.

“What would I have to do to get to the surface?”

“FOR ONE…” Papyrus responds from the kitchen as he preps to make dinner. “YOU WILL HAVE TO GO TO THE CAPITAL. IT’S A FAR JOURNEY FROM HERE. AND TWO, YOU’LL HAVE TO GO THROUGH THE KING’S CASTLE TO REACH THE BARRIER.”

“ _What?!_ ” You exclaim. The same fucking guy that’s been ordering all humans dead?!

“YOU HAVE NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT, HUMAN!! THE KING IS… WELL… HE’S A BIG FUZZY PUSHOVER!!! EVERYONE LOVES THAT GUY. I AM CERTAIN IF YOU JUST SAY… ‘EXCUSE ME, MR. DREEMER… CAN I PLEASE GO HOME?’ HE’LL GUIDE YOU RIGHT TO THE BARRIER HIMSELF!”

You definitely don’t believe that bullshit for a second. Of course, this was probably just Papyrus being naive about the situation at large. So you couldn’t blame him… you look to Sans and he only shrugs. _Oh, helpful…._

“So… but how will I cross over the barrier?”

“YOU JUST DO!!” Papyrus exclaims. “HUMAN SOULS SHOULD BE POWERFUL ENOUGH TO EXIT THE BARRIER.”

 _Really…?_ Was Toriel lying to you about that bit? Or was this another thing Papyrus wasn’t right about? And again, Sans couldn’t give any kind of reassurance on this… he actually looked like he was falling asleep standing up…

“Okay… so I have to go to the Capital. How long will that take?”

“HMMM….” Papyrus stopped stirring what ever it was he was cooking (presumably more spaghetti) and thought on this. “IF YOU WANT TO BE SAFE AND TRY TO AVOID MOST MONSTERS TO GET THERE… YOU MIGHT HAVE TO TAKE THE LONG ROUTE. I’D SAY… FOUR DAYS??”

“God, really?” You had _no way_ of surviving for that long. No materials, no money… Not to mention you had no plan if you were to run into Undyne or another hostile monster OR how you were gonna sneak into the King’s castle to get to the barrier. _No fucking plan, man…._

“*and four days is the minimum… might take longer if you aren’t familiar with the route.” Sans chimed in sleepily.

“Oh great…” You sigh weakly. You sink down onto the saggy old couch, with your face in your hands. It’s getting pretty damn close to being _entirely fucking hopeless._

“*if i were you…” Sans suggests. “*i’d maybe try and lay low in this town. most of the residences here may not have a problem with you. they are some laid back folk… you could even try and get a job and earn some money to make your trip easier.”

“Okay, but you better be fucking sure of that-“

“HEYYY!!! GOLD IN THE JAR, NOW!!” Papyrus was quickly at your side, jiggling the jar in your face.

“Augggh, I’m sorry! But I still don’t have any gold!” You hated that swear-jar… _it was stupid. Fuck that swear-jar._

“*then have one on me.” Sans pulls out a gold coin from his pockets and places it in the jar. As Papyrus returns to the kitchen, Sans leans in closer to whisper.

“(*keep that up and you’ll never have money, even with a job. just watch that mouth of yours around my bro).” He gives you a fiendish wink.

“Yeah, yeah… whatever…” You grumble, flushing a bit. _It’s still a stupid jar…_

The info the brothers had shared with you were good to know. It gave you a better perspective at what to anticipate. Plus, you could always discuss more details with them later when you were getting closer to leaving. But another immediate problem was still at hand…. where the fuck would you stay in the time being? You couldn’t just assume that the skeletons would let you stay on their couch… that was asking a lot from them. You guess you’d have to figure that out tomorrow night…

“SANS!!! HUMAN!! YOU BOTH HUNGRY??” Papyrus now waltzed out with two giant plates of spaghetti. This time, it had what looked like meatballs on it. Now, _that_ actually looked appetizing. Wait… but what the shit were those meatballs made out of? _Hmmm….._

“*thanks, bro.” Sans says, taking one of the plates in his hands.

“Yeah, thanks. Really appreciate it.” You manage to smile at him directly this time. Wow… maybe your phobia really was lightening up!

“YOU’RE SO WELCOME!!” Papyrus gives friendly pats on both of your heads.

That immediately ruined it for you…. _fucking tall people… patting you on the head to emphasize how small you were…. fuck._ You brush it off.

The three of you sit down around the coffee table and eat your pasta, chatting away. Well… it was more of Papyrus going on an extravagant rant of all the littlest bullshit things he did that day. You chimed in here and there when something came up you didn’t quite understand, just to humor him that you were paying attention. Meanwhile, Sans had actually fallen asleep half way through his meal. _He really was a fucking lazybones…._

“OH!! AFTER THIS, YOU SHOULD TEACH ME TO PLAY THAT SAXOPHONE!!” Papyrus beams, remembering it from earlier. “OH I’M SO GLAD SANS KEPT THOSE INSTRUMENTS AFTER ALL- SANS!! WAKE UP!! YOU BONEHEAD!!”

Papyrus loud voice jolted the smaller skeleton awake. He merely smiled up at you both sheepishly, like a child caught redheaded. “*heh… sorry.”

“THE HUMAN AND I WERE JUST SAYING THAT WE SHOULD PLAY SOME MORE TOONS AFTER WE FINISH EATING!!” Papyrus explains.

“*sounds great. i’m down.” Sans says with a lazy yawn.

“Well, we might wanna try and clean that sax first… probably needs it.”

“SURE THING!! OH THIS WILL BE SO MUCH FUN!!”

You actually agreed with him on that. Since you first got into music, jamming with others was always a thrill. It was the easiest way to bound with people without using words. And man, it seemed to be the trick to keeping your skeletal fright at bay. _Cheers for that… (if only you had a beverage)_.

“OH, BY THE WAY… SANS, DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT CUP OF YELLOW SODA IS DOING IN THE SINK CABINET??”

“*yellow soda? nope.”

“WELL WHERE’D IT COME FROM?? I SAW IT YESTERDAY WHEN I WAS CLEANING THE DISHES!!”

And that was when you decided to remain awkwardly quiet during the rest of the meal and explain the human’s need to piss another time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's title comes from the song Sell Out by Reel Big Fish.  
> (I mean, right? they gonna play the song, I'll name the chapter after it too hur hur hur)


	12. I'm Not A Loser

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader get's a job and meets some new faces.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry bout the late ass, short update... been swamped with school.  
> I haven't given up on this yet and still have plans for more to come.

You’re bundled up tight. You’re shaking in your goddamn boots.

Sans and Papyrus both assured you that you had a higher chance of the locals being fine with you… whether they knew you were human or not. But you weren’t convinced. Why would any monster miss out on the opportunity to fucking jump a human when they saw one? After all, you were a literal key to their freedom, or so everyone so far has told you. Why the _fuck_ would they not just tackle you and kill you immediately?

_Well the skeletons didn’t… and they know you’re human._

“*s’right if you’re scared.”

“I’m not fucking scared.” You hissed. But you… _definitely_ were.

“*i’m gonna be walkin’ with ya the whole time. if something goes wrong, i will intervene.”

“You’ve told me that already.” You were losing your patience with Sans. He was being a bit too pushy…

So the dude thought it would be a good idea for you to apply for a job to save up money. That way, you would be able to stock up on shit to help you make your way out of this mountain. Or that was the plan thus far…

The only place that would probably even consider giving you a job was the only pub in town; Your typical place for locals to eat and drink away their sorrows in this cold and dreary place; Probably a perfect stereotype of a swing bar; Sans’ element, according to his brother.

_“HE PRACTICALLY LIVES THERE. IT’S FAR TOO GREASY AND DARK AND SMELLY FOR ME!!”_

Well, you’ve worked worse. A filthy bar actually sounded fitting to you. God, you just had to make sure you didn’t spend your fucking paycheck on booze… It wouldn’t be helped, you were probably going to buy any alcohol at some point or another if it’s provided down here.

 _Do they grow potatoes down here?_ Probably… and potatoes mean vodka. _At least there might be that._

“*so uh… how long do you plan on staring at the front door?” Sans asked, his tone a bit sassy.

“Fuck off… Let’s do this.” You hesitate but then take ahold of the handle and thrust the door open. You were greeted by icy-cold air and a quiet stillness instantaneously. You let out a harsh breath… and take a step outside, letting the first sights of this town fill your eyes.

Just to the right, the majority of the town seemed to sit nestled in the bright snow. There were a few houses and a library in view. Wait… library… li… librarby? Yes, you had read that correctly; for once your dyslexia wasn’t fuckin’ with you. That sign was spelled wrong.

And so far, not a monster in sight.

“Where is everyone?” You ask Sans. Not that the emptiness was a problem. Just meant that all conflicts, if there would be any, were postponed for now.

“*probably in, eating or down at grillby’s. that’s where we are going. it’s breakfast time, after all.”

“Then why the fuck would I be going in to apply when they’re busy?” First rule you always learned when applying for a job at a food joint; never try and apply when the manager or workers might be too busy to talk to you. That way, you can’t make a good, memorable impression.

“*cus’ they won’t be too busy to talk to you. it’s a small town.”

“I see.” The two of you walk down the path passed the library, feet crunching loudly on the snow.

It didn’t take long to reach this so called ‘Grillby’s.’ The name implied it to be more of a food joint, rather than a bar. _But you still hoped… God fucking christ, you hoped for booze._

Sans led the way in and you followed timidly. Suddenly, all your optimism was gone… You hadn’t had much to begin with, but the moment you see dog monsters sitting in the middle of the restaurant, you feel your gut drop. And sure enough, the one you met in the forest a few days ago was among them. He was gonna see you… since you were moving and walking just passed them.

“Uh… Sans…?” You try and whisper to him, but he doesn’t seem to hear you over loud barking and other commotion in the small interior space.

 _Fucking shit….._ Your eyes dart back to the dog as you continue to stride after the skeleton. And sure enough, the dog perks up and sees you. Actually, all of the dogs are now staring into your direction curiously. But to your fucking relief… none of them seem to advance… or attack… or anything. They just watch. Boy, did it feel fucking hot as balls in here or what….? You feel your heart hammering in your chest. Why were they just staring…? Surely, that one dog at leasts recognized you….

“*sup, grillby.”

You almost collide into the back of Sans from lack of watching where the fuck you were going. Sans had stopped at the bar and greeted its tender. _And oh… that’s why it was so hot here._ The bartender was literally on fire. Or they were fire? Hard to say… It took you a second to recover your stupid-ass gawking face at the brilliant sight.

The bartender didn’t say a word but merely nodded to Sans like an old friend. Perhaps they were. It would make sense why Sans was so confident that he could score you a job at the place. Was this the owner? _Oh duh…_ Sans called them Grillby. They must be the owner.

“Hello.” That’s all you can manage. You’re not really sure where to start or if you should start this conversation at all. The fireman merely nods to you too, as they clean off the inside of a dirty glass. That glass didn’t seem to be getting much cleaner… It was amazing how that rag wasn’t bursting into flames from their touch.

 _Well…_ You glance to Sans for help, nervously chewing on your lower lip a bit. Sans takes a seat at the bar.

“*my friend here just moved to snowdin. she needs a job. you think she could work here with you, grillbz?”

Grillby seemed to consider you for a moment. Only the flames on the top of their head moved at all as they stared at you through their glasses. You couldn’t see their fucking eyes….. and that freaked you out a bit.

You think you see the flamed monster nod their head again ever so slightly…. or not? Fuck, was that just the movement of the flames or did they actually nod?

“*cool.” Sans says, grinning widely. “*thanks.”

So yes? That was a nod? You merely stand there awkwardly for a minute. The fireman was still staring at you… _oh shit, don’t be a fucking ass!_ You bow your head slightly and thank them sincerely.

“*take a seat, buddy.” Sans offers, patting the bar stool next to him.

You straddle the seat awkwardly and plop down next to the skeleton. The moment your legs give out and your butt makes contact to that stool-

**_PFFFFFFHHHHHTTTH!_ **

**Jesus FUCKING christ.** You slowly turn a seething death glare towards the skeleton. Is this shit funny to him? He goes out of his way to set you up with a job and then immediately _humiliates_ the fuck out of you in front of the potential boss by placing a goddamn whoopee cushion under you??

_Was he a FUCKING childish five-year-old?!_

Sans seems completely unfazed by your wrathful eyes. He merely chuckles and gives you a playful wink (which makes your blood boil all the more). “*watch out, weirdos like to put those there for crude pranks.”

“I _know_ it was you….” you’re voice is quiet and low but oh so venomous and cold. How was it fucking possible for this skeleton to go from making you content and cheery to wanting to kick you boot so high up his nonexistent ass checks!

“*quick to assume.” He chimes innocently (guiltily). “*relax… you got a job now. easy. no problamo’. now we celebrate with some great food.”

“Sure… _alright_.” You manage through gritted teeth. It was taking everything you had to keep your aggressive nature from lashing out at him. Had to play it cool in front of the new boss.

But really… so that was it? Just come up and ask for a job and the job was yours? _Christ…_ if only it had been that easy to get work back home. No one wanted to hire the likes of you… you had to play by their rules and warp your appearance and attitude to their liking to even be _considered._ You were starting to like the monster way of life more and more… (minus the kill all humans part, naturally).

“*what sounds good to eat, pal?” Sans asks.

“Uh…” No menu was offered and there didn’t seem to be one written out anywhere in the bar, as far as you could tell. “What are you having?” You ask.

“*probably just a burg.”

A burg? You prayed it was a burger. “I’ll have that too.”

“*grillbz, order of two burgs, please.”

The fireman nods and walks towards the back of the place through a door. You watch him go, feeling a bit awkward. “The guy doesn’t say much, huh?”

“*not a word, usually. don’t worry, you’ll get use to it. takes a lot to piss that man off. you’ll know if you do something wrong.”

You gulp. “If he doesn’t talk, how am I suppose to know what to do working here?”

Sans side eyes you with his tiny pin-prick eyes. He had gone from a lazy slouch against the bar to practically laying his chest and chin bone on the counter top. His voice falls to a lower volume, almost a hush whisper. “*you don’t have places like this on the surface?”

What a fucking weird question to respond with. “Of course we do. This is basically a pub. Serve food and drink here, yeh?”

“*so what do you think workers do at a pub?”

You leer at him before answering. “Serve food and drink.”

“*there you go. all you gotta do.” Sans gives you a simple shrug.

You glare down at the lazy skeleton for a moment. _Goddamn sass-master._ Though it’s like he said, and judging by the small population here, the place wouldn’t be that busy… so pleasing the customers couldn’t be that hard. _Or…_ Your eyes look over your shoulder, small bubbling panic forming in the pit of your stomach again. How had you forgotten? The dog monsters. Particularly the black and white one that had not stopped staring in your direction since they had spotted you.

“I had run into that dog guy before…” You hushly say under your breath, making sure Sans is the only one who hears you. “And they knew what I was…. and tried to kill me.”

“*yeah I know, buddy…” Sans says nonchalantly like it’s no problem at all. You feel your irritation trying to climb back to the surface again.

“So then don’t you think they’re gonna come after me again? And what about their other doggie friends??”

“*i already took care of it. relax. they’re all sentries like me and my bro. i’ve had a talk with them.”

“Oh yeah?” Your nerves are starting to calm ever so slightly.

“*yeah… i convinced doggo that you were not a human… you are a monster from the capital. so naturally, living in a hotter area, you don’t have a lot of fur on your body for this cold weather.”

“Doggo? The weird kinda-blind one?”

“*that’s the one.”

“And they believed you?”

“*yup.”

“That easily?” You are a bit dumbfounded. The dog seemed so sure you were a human when they were fighting you.

“* **mut** ’n to worry about.”

You groan at his awfully placed dog-pun. “And I guess the other dogs are cool then too?”

“*sure. although you’re new in town so they may be interested in you… and will probably beg for some attention.”

Just like an ordinary dog. Huh… you begin to wonder if certain kinds of monsters have actually evolved from other animals like humans had from apes. Why the fuck not? _With magic involved, anything was fucking possible_ , you thought sarcastically.

Grillby comes back out the back door with two plates in his flaming hands. The smell of cooked meat fills your nose causing you to salivate like a true animal. God, it _was_ a burger. Not only something else besides goddamn pasta, but a juicy, greasy, calorie-stuffed burger. The finest of comfort foods. You fucking needed this.

“*ketchup?” Sans offers.

He had seemed to pull that ketchup bottle out of no where. What was ketchup doing down here? How the hell were they growing tomatoes in a place without sunlight? A quick thought of highly processed and artificial food crosses your mind and you decide right now is not the time to think or care about it. You’ll try this so-called ketchup.

“Sure, thanks.” You take the bottle from his hands and tip it over to give your burger a little added flavor when-

The goddamn ketchup completely dunks out of the whole bottle and floods your plate in the red shit. It’s been watered down…. **pranked.**

You would _strangle the shit_ out of that goddamn skeleton if he actually had a throat to choke!!

Before you can send another menacing threat to him, he chuckles and nudges his own burger towards you. “*saw the opportunity and took it. sorry, pal. have my burg, i’m actually not that hungry.”

You immediately swipe his burger up, dunk it lightly in your flooded ketchup plate and gnaw off a good chunk of it before he can change his mind. God it was delicious…. melts your rage away, no problem.

“*promise i’m done, had my fun for the day.”

“Good…” You grumble with a mouthful of fatty greatness. You can’t help but scarf the whole thing down so fucking quickly. Didn’t give a shit if it was rude or obscene. The magic, you assume, inside of it restores all weariness and doubt you had felt earlier that morning. It was great. Plus it felt satisfying to say that you had just ate a goddamn burger for breakfast. _Fuck yeah!_

After you’ve licked clean your messy meal, you glance back over at Grillby. He had returned his attention to that muddy glass that seemed to never get polished.

“Uh… so Grillby, when do I start work?” You ask him curiously. _Immediately,_ please, you think. The sooner you could earn some mons and get the fuck out of here the better. The fireman shrugs in your general direction.

“*i guess whenever you want.”

“Shall I come by tomorrow morning then?” You ask him again, although at this point, you don’t expect anything but a shake, a nod or some other simple body gesture. And sure enough, the fireman nods, not taking his gaze off his task of scrubbing the goddamn glass over and over… This was starting to seem like a nervous tick rather than actual cleaning.

“Cool, I’ll be over around the same ti-“

Something wet and kinda cold presses against the smallest amount of exposed skin on your back and you almost leap out of your seat. One of the dog monsters had come up to great you and seemed to have no concept of fucking personal space. Really was just a dog.

“Uhh… hello?”

“*meet greater dog.” Sans says lazily.

The white dog was gigantic and wore an impressive armor set. He would be intimidating if it weren’t for the wagging tail, panting smile and watery puppy eyes guilting you for affection.

“Hey there, dude.” You say and reach out a hand to the massive dog’s head. The dog instantly greets your hand with his face and he starts to lean his entire weight onto your lap, panting loudly. “Woahh!” Heavy-ass dog that thinks it’s a pomeranian…. if it weren’t for the other sentry dogs calling him off of you, you thought he would crush you from his weight alone. The Greater Dog gives you a lick on the face and trots back over to his friends.

“Wow…” You gasp, readjusting yourself back on your stool. “Friendly guy…”

Sans chuckles and nods to Grillby. “*put the burgs on my tab, grillbz.” He then gets up and starts immediately walking for the door. “*well, kid, now that you’re set, imma go. see ya around.”

“Uh… alright.” He doesn’t give you much of a chance to respond before he’s out the door. “Thanks for the help, I guess.” You mumble.

You look back at the soggy, soaked ketchup mess on the other plate and sigh. Food was good, job was set, but you were no where near content. It was gonna take a lot of will power to get through this goddamn bullshit. Your leg started to bounce up and down anxiously on the stool’s foot rest. _You could do it…_ you’re no loser. _You’re a fucking winner._ You scoff pathetically under your breath as you try to take your own thoughts to heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's title is the song I'm Not A Loser by The Descendents.


	13. I'm So Damn Bored, I'm Going Blind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The punk can't live a repetitive, mundane life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm still alive. Sorry for not updating a while, been taking a lot of time to adjust back in my hometown from my big move. 
> 
> Here, have some more shit. Heads up, its gets a bit angsty.

The morning air is colder than normal. It causes a tightness in your throat the moment you step outside, but you shrug it off.

“Gonna have to tune this fucking thing again…” How do you always forget that being outside is gonna do this to your trumpet? Oh well, maybe one day you’d learn.

You had lost count how many times you’d done this now. Get up early, find a secluded place in the forest, play your instrument, then go to work. It helped keep your spirits up, especially since you were going on week three of being stuck here. Sure, yer boss Grillby was paying you fairly. Sure you were getting a pay check every end of the week. But god fucking _damn_ you… you had to spend most of everything you earned on warmer clothes, yer own food, booze…. You bite down on your lip, snarling to yourself. _Yeah, well…_ let’s see any person try to not drink and stay sane down here. It was always cold, no sunlight, barely any new people to talk to. Everyone seemed bored as hell down in the Underground. You _really_ didn’t blame them.

The snow crunching under your feet echoes loudly since nothing else was stirring. You must be the first person awake. Seemed weird to be the early riser, considering how your old life still not too long ago involved sleeping in ’til two in the afternoon. Guess it was easy when your sense of time is obscured down here. 

You make it to the bridge that leads you into the forest. You hadn’t noticed the first few times, but the damn thing was a fake. Apparently, the bridge was just a rock painted to look like a bridge. _Hilarious_ , you had thought. Someone must have been _really_ bored too. Just as you make it over to the other side, you spot your usual company.

“*Sup?” Chilldrake squawks at you. He looks like he had been waiting there a while, his impatient face relaxing a bit.

“Not much, sorry, got a late start this morning.” You softly blow some hot air into the bell of your trumpet a few times to try and warm it.

“*It’s **cool**.” The reptilian teenager tried too fucking hard to be easy going.

“Ready for a new one?”

“*Heck yeah!”

After the first day of deciding to come out here and play in the cold, this fellow monster had heard your music and curiously came to listen. He had brought a few of his other teen friends along some other times, and they all enjoyed your performance. But lately, it had just been him. It was still nice to have someone appreciate your music.

First a few scales. Then a quick tune adjustment. Then song.

You lift your brass instrument high and proud and the strong melody of ‘Here’s To Life’ by Streetlight Manifesto boomed through the still space. The whole valley of the Snowdin area seemed to come alive as the trumpet part to the song carried through the trees, over the mounds and to the town. The townsfolk never once complained. The damping of the snow made the song soft and easy to the ears as each citizen began to wake to their new, pleasant alarm clock. For Chilldrake, he got the full volume of the song and began to mosh around in the snow, kicking up flakes and shouting excitedly, just like how you had shown him. Teen or not, you were glad to spread the social norms of the punk culture to someone. Besides, you felt it was a healthy way for the kid to burn off some of his angst. 

“*That was a brutal song!” Chilldrake cried after you finished. “*What’s that one about?”

“Fighting depression and staying alive.” You smile grimly. Normally, you aren’t crazy about being so on the nose about something, but lately you’ve been feeling like it was harder to get up today. _Well at least you did get up, yeh?_

“*Cooool.” The frosty bird said, shuddering a bit. “*So where do you discover all this music? You can’t have possibly written ALL of it.”

“Nah it’s… just stuff I found among the human waste.” You lie, trying to remember your made-up story for consistency. “The humans’ genre of punk was so sick, I had to try and learn it myself.”

“*You gotta show me sometime, is it on a CD?” Chilldrake ruffles his feathers a bit, a dorky grin spreading on his beak.

Sometimes it surprises you how knowledgable monsters were of human technology, especially younger monsters. But CDs? That’s pretty outdated at this point. Makes sense though…

“Uh, no, I have it on a phone.”

“*A phone? Wayyy cool. I didn’t know human phones could play music.”

You just casually shrug. According to both Sans and Papyrus, it was smart to keep your human knowledge to a vague minimum. That way your identity was safe. “Well, sorry to say, dude, but since I got up late, I only have time for that one song. Gotta get to work.”

“*Ahhh dang. You better be back tomorrow!” The teen pouts a bit, but then quickly tries to straighten his face to a relaxed expression.

“No worries, I will. See ya.”

 

…

 

Grillby’s is slow as ever today. You spend most of your time repetitively going around the small pub’s space, sweeping up dog fur and and snow for the 5th or 6th time. By this point, the floor really didn’t need it… you just wanted something to do rather than sit still. Hardly any costumers were in. Just the usual Big Mouth and Drunk Bun… you don’t know if that’s actually their names, just how Sans refers them by. The sentry dogs have already come and gone for lunch. Grillby had returned to his usual favorite spot behind the bar, polishing that foggy glass with the dirty-ass rag. Yep, definitely a tick of his, no doubt about it.

You sigh to yourself, your brain feeling like it was oozing out of your head from sheer boredom. You’d rather be doing anything else right now…. but you needed the goddamn money…

“*hey buddy, how come only one song this morning?”

You were somehow expecting it this time, and actually relieved that Sans had popped in. Perhaps he can save you an hour of boredom.

“Woke up late…” You respond lamely. Even he and Papyrus could hear you playing every morning from their house and had commented on how nice it was to wake up to.

“*so you over- **swept**?” He gives you a friendly wink. 

You cringe a bit from his awful joke. “Har har…” Your laugh is as dry as you can possibly fucking make it. 

Sans sits down at the bar and nods to Grillby. “*one order of fries, please.”

Grillby vanishes into the kitchen, thrilled to have something new to do rather than scrub that glass. Sans scratches his back lazily and turns back to you looking half asleep.

“Just woke up from another nap at your post?” You ask, trying not to sound judgmental. The dude sleeps all the goddamn time.

“*yep.” Sans response. “*that way i have enough energy tonight for another music lesson.”

Damn, making plans involving you _without_ you? _Sheesh…_ “Sure, okay.” You really couldn’t complain, a jam session was solid gold for you down here. “Was there anything in particular you wanted to learn?”

“*nah, just want to know more in general. you’re choice, buddy.”

Ever since Sans was able to get your phone a new, converted charger, you’ve been able to play songs on it for him during your jam sessions. It was so much fucking easier to follow along a song, than trying to play it alone. And thanks to monster technology, you even had some louder speakers to plug your phone into for better sound. Jam sessions with the lazybones was fucking legit now.

Oh and you’ve been slowly converting him to the punk genre. At least with the music. The dude’s personality didn’t mesh well with the social life style, but he dug the tunes. He too definitely preferred ska punk rather than hard core, street punk or most other sub-genres.  

“*how much money you got saved up now?”

You groan. “Don’t remind me, dude…” 

Sans side eyes you through his dark sockets. “*you bought a few jackets and new clothes which ya definitely needed. but you really don’t have to buy your own food.” He turns to you fully, leaning against the counter. “*i told ya pap and i can cover you.”

“Nah, man, you guys have done enough. Besides, you guys seem like you don’t need to be feeding one extra mouth.”

Sans chuckles a bit. “*what makes you say that?”

“Uh well…” _Shit_. You kinda assumed they were both badly off financial due to the state of their house, lack of food and furniture. Kinda fucking _rude_ of you, as always. “I just, uh… don’t wanna cause you guys any problems. Yer already letting me use your shed as a temporary one bedroom place…” 

“*you’re not causing problems. we’re always happy to help a pal out.”

You grumble, nodding. Your goddamn pride was getting the better of you again.

“*say, why not let me and my bro take care of dinner tonight? that way you can buy yourself a round tomorrow.” He offers with a grin.

“Yeah, that’s the responsible thing to do… waste more money on alcohol.” You roll your eyes. Great, now he must think you’re a fucking alcoholic. “C’mon, dude… it’s fine. I’ll feed myself.”

“*i insist. and just save your money then.”

“That sounds more reasonable…” You sigh. “Alright, fine. Just this one more time.”

“*i bet i can surprise you with my cooking ability.”

You scoff but smile at him. “I’ll be more surprised that you actual cook at all.”

Sans shrugs trying to look a lil smug. “*hey, i get around to it now and then. but yeah, a skeleton usually doesn’t have the **stomach** for good eatin’.”

“Oh my ffff….” you trail off, letting your annoyance for his puns fizzle out. Can’t be firing off your filthy mouth at the work place. “Well, I beg to differ, your brother eats so much pasta.”

“*true.” 

Grillby comes back with the hot, greasy plate of fries and pulls out a giant bottle of ketchup. You watch as the skeleton greedily pours half of it onto the fries, flooding it with ketchup. _Gross…_

“You think you’re ready to try some faster, more complicated songs?” You ask him, as you watch him pick at the fries. 

“*yeah, try me. i think i can handle it.”

You grin to yourself. _Ohhhh yes, here comes the Streetlight songs now._ Your smile immediately fades at the sight of sans fingers and face getting covered in ketchup. Seriously, this guy was the worst stereotype of a slob. Then again, perhaps it was just how skeleton monsters ate… Papyrus wasn’t that much more graceful either. _But how do they eat….? Nah, don’t try…_ you’ve been questioning this same thought for a while now.

Now that his plate was just a crummy ketchup mess, he excused himself from the bar, wiping the ketchup unsuccessfully off his face. “*welp, see ya tonight.”

“Yeah… see ya.” You sigh, shaking your head. 

Grillby takes up his plate and goes to mark down some numbers on a clipboard. Tallying up the lazybones’ tab. You wondered how high it was gonna be this week…

 

…

Dinner was swell as you could expect. It was a crusty overcooked lasagna, by the great chef Papyrus himself. Still not terribly great, but you were finally agreeing with Sans that he was getting better. And it was filling at the very least.

Jamming also went well, you thought. Sans was getting extraordinarily better at trombone. He managed to learn the opening to _“Failing, Flailing”_ by Streetlight, and that was thrilling to your ears. Perhaps he could learn a whole song soon. Perhaps…

The evening was fine. And yet, you were not.

The moment you are alone for the night in the skeletons’ tiny shed, a heavy sigh escapes your lips. You crank up the setting on the tiny space heater in the corner and plug your phone into its charger. Gotta put on some tunes…. the silence is just a bit too eerie. 

‘ _O Green World by Gorillaz_ ’ 

Good, a nice _mellow, hopeless_ sounding song to fit your _emo-ass_ mood. You collapse on the ratty mattress, letting the heavy feeling finally take you. 

Jamming was always great. But it’s… just… so… goddamn repetitive now. This whole routine of living down here in a cold, barren town… repetitive… and almost lifeless. Fucking christ. How do they live like this?

Were you just too damn spoiled living on the surface? Were you just too fucking spoiled in general? It had only been a few weeks… and you were already so sick of it all, you just wanted to die. Not to mention… your fears and worries and all the awful feelings you had bottled up before you came here… they were just aching to surface. You let them leak every now and then when you were alone… just a bit. And that’s probably what you would have to do again tonight.

“Fuck…. **FUCK!** ” You yell, eyes burning and hands thrashing on the wall. “I can’t fucking **take it**.” 

Even trying to comfort yourself with thoughts like ‘just hang in there, you almost have enough money’ or ‘don’t give up, you’ll be out of here soon’ feels empty. There was no fucking guarantee that your efforts of saving up and going on a long journey to escape the mountain would be worth it. You still couldn’t get a definite answer that a human being would be able to cross that barrier. So what the fuck would happen if you some how made it passed all the sentries guarding the path to the capital and passed the fucking King of all monsters to the barrier and still not be able to cross it? **What the fuck then?!**

…You felt weak. Very little hope was left. Tears pooled at the corners of your eyes as you sulk in your worries and anger.

Something had to be done. You had to change up some shit. Make it easier to get by…

“No, sorry Gorillaz… perhaps a later time.” You pause the song and start scrolling through your library again. “I might actually need something more up beat.”

_‘Genocide by The Offspring.’_

The heavy, fast chords flood the small space. The pound of drums come in. You start fucking flailing in your own one-person mosh pit. You grunt and snarl and scream, you kick and thrust and punch, you skank and stomp and thrash. Each time you collide hard with the wooden walls, a hiss of small satisfaction blows through your grit teeth. 

_“Dog eat dog~ Every day~ On our fellow man we prey~ Dog eat dog~ To get by~ Hope you like my genocide~”_

The sharp pain meant you were feeling again. And the longer you went, the more your blood rushed. 

This poor shed will take a bit of a beating tonight. But you justified it to yourself that it was necessary. This kept you from stewing in your own shitty thoughts.

_Fer yer health, after all…_

Need to stop drinking so much… need to find something better to do… something new… to get by. Whether you were going to be able to leave this godforsaken place or not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's title is based off of 'Long View' by Green Day.


	14. Why Do I Do This To Myself?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Punks have a tendency to be self destructive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning now for alcohol abusing. And vomiting. Jolly good times, ya'll.  
> Sorry for the short chapter again, but hey, short and sweet.

_You dirty fucking hypocrite._

You beat yourself up all last night about wasting your time and money on booze… and what do you _fucking_ do the next day? Buy more booze.

You had a short shift today and were feeling jazzed up. Almost like a second wind… if you were miserable the day before, you tend to get a back lash of unexplained joy the next day. It was fucking weird… but whatever. You weren’t complaining.

So to complement that perky mood, you treat yourself to the one thing you love most down here these days: Alcohol. Or more specifically, monster alcohol.

At Grillby’s, they have one particular distilled concoction that you actually have grown fond of. It tasted like spicy tequila. But thank _god_ it didn’t make you black out like tequila. You still acted like a fucking idiot, but at least you remembered (almost) everything afterward.

You’re sitting on the other side of the bar this time as a customer, having a few rounds… _Ok…_ more than a few rounds. You’re plastered. _Again._ For the _fourth time this week_.

Grillby had started to show a little concern for your repetition in drinking, at least in the most expressive way Grillby could physically show. But you were insistent that you were fine… so he kept giving you your orders of shots and mixed drinks. Now on the other hand… there was one other person who was more nosy about your drinking problem… and he was the last person you wanted being a buzz kill.

And as if the thought was some sort of magnet pulling him towards you, you hear someone sit down next to you. You lazily role your eyes to your left. Sans is propped up on the counter, but his attention is fully turned to you.

“*hey pal… it’s getting late.”

“Ah so what…” You chuckle dramatically, a hick-up escaping your lips. He still irritated the shit out of you when he babied you like this, but the booze helped you laugh him off at the very least. The sound must have startled him a bit because he gives a start and a confused look. You would have guessed he’d never seen a drunk human before. That thought makes you giggle more, because it’s totally bullshit. He’s seen you drunk plenty of times.

“I stay up late all the time. I always have. Cuz I never sleep much.” You sway dangerously. You can definitely feel his eyes watching you carefully. He sits on the edge of the bar stool, as if ready to reach out and stop you from toppling over. “Never was a good sleeper in the past…” You slur, your eyes glazing a bit, as you think about the countless nights you lost to your insomnia. “And still not now…” It’s hard to focus, but you can still make out the brilliant display of bottles behind the counter. A stupid grin spreads over your face. You had been meaning to get to trying some of those other new types of alcohol… whatever they did to make it, whether it magic or curses or some other fantasy sounding bullfuck, it really made your head buzz to life! Couldn’t compare to the shitty beer you scavenged for on the surface.

You lift your glass to your lips, but a boney hand reaches out and stops you. You turn slowly to Sans, who still has his tiny pinpricked eyes fixated on you. Your eyes narrow at him. You still don’t like it when he or his brother touched you…. makes the anxiety bubble in your stomach. Living with them for a while still wasn’t enough to just make a phobia simply vanish.

He seems to notice your warning, and flashes a reassuring smile at you. “*how’sabout we call it a night?” He offers, trying to pry the glass from your fingers. He carefully pulls it away from you and sets it down on the bar.

You are too over your limit to react quickly. “Heeeyyyy,” You mumble. “Imnot done with’at…” Your slurring was getting worse. You squint your eyes at Sans. You can see four… no, six eye sockets on his face now. And his smile was getting all wonky and wavy. _Fuckin’ creepy…_

“*c’mon, bucko, come with me. you can stay on me n’ pap’s couch tonight. i’m sure he won’t mind.”

“Naaaahhh,” You protest, giving him a friendly (and rather forceful) shove. “I cen stay in the shed n’again..”

“*nah, buddy. i think you’ve had too much for that. don’t worry, our couch is just as comfortable, remember? you won’t be able to tell a difference.”

Sans finally convinces you to go with him. He closes out your tab for you and hoists your arm over his shoulders. He’s practically dragging you out of the pub because your goddamn feet don’t wanna cooperate any more. “*c’mon, almost home…” The stumbling through the cold air feels so familiar…

This is probably the fourth or fifth time that Sans had to fetch you from the bar before you go way over your head. It wasn’t becoming a pretty pattern. People in the town definitely noticed and talked about your awful habit. Hard to tell if they were more concerned or being judgmental. But like you gave a fuck either way…

Sans manages to get you into the warm house and pulls your snow covered jacket off of you. You plop down on the couch, with your head propped up on the back frame. You burp and roll your gaze back to the lazybones. “B… bucket…” you murmur.

“*gotcha, one sec.” Sans isn’t gone long, and is holding out a plastic bucket to you. Just on time, as you hastily grab it and lurch out all the fucking liquid you just downed in the past few hours. You’d think you’d learn… but no, ‘corse not. Being sick to your stomach almost every other day was better than dying of boredom, apparently.

After you stop heaving, you look to see he’s still standing there. Just staring. With that stupid fake grin of his. Probably judging you hard.

“*better?”

“…yeah… thanks.” You grumble, setting the bucket down at your feet. You keep it there cuz you might want it later.

“*i don’t know a whole lot about humans, but this can’t be healthy for you to keep doing so much…”

Here we go again. He was gonna lecture you like last time.

“Plenty people drink more than I do and are fine.” You say simple.

“*but why do it so much? there’s plenty of better stuff to do.”

“Sure, we play trumpet and trombone. Sure, we eat good food at Grillby’s… and we make snow monsters and play with puzzles in the forest…” You practically recite for him, since he basically says the same shit to you every time you get smashed. Because at this point, the walking and vomiting has sobered you up enough to argue why you were being so destructive. “But it’s not fucking substantial forever, Sans.”

Sans eye sockets some how look tired. The light has faded a bit and his skull is tilted down to the floor.

“*you really have more fun drinking yourself away…?” His voice is cold, almost with a frustrated bite. It’s a bit surprising coming from him.

You answer him with a pathetically sad laugh. “It’s not about having fun…” Your head lolls to the side and take in a deep breath. You still feel his gaze on you, as if he’s waiting for you to say more but you’ve gone quiet now. You don’t really want to finish that sentence… _that you drink to forget why you came here in the first place._

In the corner of your eye, you see a glass held up to your face. You glance up to see a tall one full of water, and a closer to genuine smile from the lazybones. You take it with just a mere grunt of gratitude, chug a good half of it, and hand it back.

“*let me know if you need anything else. i’ll be in my room.”

You barely nod as you sink down all the way on the couch. Your head was still spinning a bit, but it was bearable. Quite bearable, actually. The last of the buzz takes you under into a sudden and deep sleep.

—

 

There were soft plucks of guitar strings and a sinking feeling like everything is unstable. But you were alright with it. Being unstable was normal for now.

Andrew was sounding out a new melody. He occasionally hummed along to find harmonies. You were leaned back against him, staring up at the ceiling, listening to his playing. It was soothing to lounge on summer days like this. It was still summer… right? Felt awfully cool to be…

“Do you remember that song you once wrote for me?” You ask, smiling fondly at the memory of how it sounded.

“Yeah, sure…” Andrew said after a pause in his work. “You realize that was the first song I had actually finished at the time, right?”

“Really?” You act surprised, although this conversation sounds familiar.

“Yeah,” He chuckles. The guitar chords repeat again, only this time a little faster.

You smile again. Part of you hoped that the song he was playing now would transition into that song. But it was an old one, Andrew could write better now.

“I’m gonna have a beer…” you announce, but don’t move just yet. It was just so damn comfortable being next to him. “You want one?” You offer.

Andrew is quite for a moment as the guitar sings on softly.

“Nah..I’m good.” He pauses again as the melody repeats again. “I don’t wanna forget it.”

You chuckle as you lean back far enough to look up into his face. “One beer will really make you forget your song?” You asked amused.

He looks down at you and he returns a smile, but its a lot more somber than your own.

“I don’t wanna forget that Jack is probably dead…”

Your lungs grow stiff with ice. Andrew’s smile fades to a frown as he looks down at the floor and plucks out a familiar tune. You can’t place it at the moment.

“My brother…” You whisper.

Your eyes snap open. All of a sudden the interior of the skeleton brother’s house rushes to your sense with only the soft distant memory of the guitar strumming in your ears. You shut your eyes tight for a moment and curse softly under your breath. “Fuck…”

You think you are alone. At least for a moment. But then you see a short someone in the kitchen having themselves a midnight snack.

You leer in Sans general direction, even though his back is to you. He says nothing, doesn’t turn to you, or even make any sign that he’s aware that you are awake. He throws something in the trash and in a flash he’s gone. Probably teleported back to his room…

You bitterly roll on your side and grope under the couch. There, you find the blanket that Papyrus had once bundled you up a few weeks ago that had been shoved under there and forgotten. You toss it over your head so you can muffle back your cries of bitter guilt. You scold yourself to never drink again to forget… Just drink to fucking feel better… _but you gotta come to terms with events that have already happened._

_Yeah…_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's title is based off of Self Destructive Anthem by Days N’ Daze


	15. Don't Stand So Close To Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The punk's mind goes to some weird places.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, getting to some weird fun parts now, I spose.  
> Sorry if my writings a bit wonky in this one, I've been a lil too much in my head lately. Cheers.

“Please… I don’t want anymore eggs…” You whimper weakly. Mostly because the eggs remind you so much of the shit you chucked up last night.

“HUMAN, IF YOU ARE SICK AGAIN, EATING WILL HELP. MONSTER FOOD DOES WONDERS TO YOU, REMEMBER??” Papyrus edges on, waving a spatula full of half cooked eggs in front of you.

You lazily turn away from it, groaning in protest. “Too sick to eat right now…”

Papyrus sighs dramatically and returns the food to the kitchen.

Sans sits next to you, lazily twirling an empty glass around on the table that had some kind of fruit juice in it a moment ago. He looks just as weak as you, but rather from being hung over, he’s just tired yet again. You began to wonder if the guy really was **that** lazy or perhaps he also suffered from insomnia. He hasn’t said a word other than “*morning” and “*sup”. He also has barely touched his breakfast that Papyrus has made for everyone. But you didn’t blame him… his brother was still far from making anything enjoyably edible.

“Is there anymore of that aspirin left?” You grumble towards Sans. You’re pretty sure you had thrown that bottle away a few days ago from using all of it up, but you were hopeful there might be some left… just some fucking how.

“*nope.” Sans replies simply. “*and haven’t found anymore at the dump yet.”

“Ffffff…” You trail off, not wanting Papyrus to attack your wallet with the swear-jar again. “Where are tacos when you _really_ need them…?”

“*tacos?”

“Yeah, man… spicy breakfast tacos are the best hang over cure when you’ve got no meds.” You mumble. Your mouth is starting to water just thinking about a jalepano sausage taco with ghost pepper sauce and a fuck-ton of cheese… all topped on a fried egg. _Oh home, god you missed it so._

“*sounds good.”

 _Sounds more than just good, buddy._ You roll your eyes a bit. Perhaps they didn’t really have tacos down here, it would be hard to make with limited food. You felt sorry for the poor souls. They had no fucking clue what they were missing.

Then an idea hit you… why not just wing it yourself and make some?

“Say… if you’d like, I can make dinner tonight and try to make some tacos.”

Sans grins at you with half open eyes. “*sure.”

“YOU COOK, HUMAN?? ARE YOU SURE?? I DON’T MEAN TO BRAG, BUT I DO MAKE THE VERY BEST CUISINE!!” Papyrus glows a bit as you take a moment to hide a dramatic gag.

“Well, I bet you’ve never had tacos before, Papyrus.” You say simply. “I’ll make them for you and then you’ll have a new meal to add to your recipe book. How’s that sound?”

“SOUNDS WONDERFUL!! A MASTER CHEF ALWAYS ACCEPTS NEW RECIPES!! THAT WAY THEY REMAIN AT THE VERY TOP!! THE BEST!!”

Papyrus has his little shin-dig fit about cooking and popularity, as you turn back to Sans.

“It’s been a while since I’ve been to the store, but I’ll see if I can come up with enough ingredients to make some proper tacos. Might have to make some of this from scratch, to be honest.”

“*sure it’ll be fine either way.”

Suddenly your head feels a lil lighter. It’s been a hot-minute since you’ve cooked for others. This could be fun… or it could go horribly wrong if the store has nothing to use. Either way, you wanna try.

“Alright, I’m gonna go.” You announce. You look down at Sans’ eggs as your stomach makes a rumbly perk of interest. “You done with those?”

Sans lazily pushes the plate away from him. You steal some eggs off of his plate now that your appetite finally kicked in.

“YOU’RE GOING NOW?? BUT I THOUGHT YOU WERE SICK!!” Papyrus sounds irritated and confused, but you don’t really feel the need to explain yourself.

Wrestling on your boots and coat and ignoring Papyrus’ protests that you should rest first, you bolt out the door. You’re pretty sure you hear the skeletons remark how incredible humans can just bounce back once their minds are set to something.

—

 

“This is all we got for tomatoes.” The furry clerk at the store offers. You keep wanting to call him a rabbit, but it’s just because of the long ears and the poofy tail. He’s holding up a beat-to-hell can of tomatoes. Must have found that at the dump…

You take it from him and inspect the can, making sure it’s seal is still in tact. Should be fine to eat if it is, right…?

“Sure, I’ll take it…” You grumble.

“Sorry… That skeleton fellow bought out all our fresh produce for the month…” The clerk mentions, as if this is a common circumstance.

 _Goddamnit, Papyrus… And it’s all going to waste with his gross-ass pasta._ And kinda inconsiderate. It takes so long for the monsters down here to grow food and he just buys up all the stuff they have for commercial use. None left for anyone else…

You look down at the counter of all the things you gathered for a meal. As expected… there were no tortillas. Luckily, they had flour, salt and baking powder to make some from scratch… but no lard either. You’ve never substituted lard before… but your best guess was you could maybe use the vegetable oil that Papyrus had in the kitchen. Just had to make sure to get the dough the right consistency.

As for the filler of the tacos, they surprisingly had cheese. But it was no cotija or cheddar… it was fucking stinky as hell; which you’ve been told that meant it would taste better… hopefully. You had no idea what this cheese was gonna be like. The store also had some strange mystery meat. They said it was actually from a plant but smelled and looked like your typical ground up fatty parts of an animal you had leftovers of. Could work as chorizo. You’d just have to season it with some of that chilly powder, cinnamon and cumin you saw in the cabinets at the house. Last, you managed to get a small onion that they had leftover. Looked like it would expire any day, but the rabbit-looking monster ensured you that it was still safe to eat if you cooked it tonight.

Well… it wasn’t going to be amazing, but perhaps you could make some decent tacos for the skeletons and yourself. You were actually pretty excited for this, regardless of the pathetic selections of ingredients.

You hand the cashier the gold for your groceries and scoop up as much as you can in your arms. You insist you need no help as the clerk watches you struggle out the door.

Outside, you’ve dropped a few things, cursing foully under your breath. _C’mon, damn fucking arms, do your job and just keep ahold of everything…_

“*need any help?”

You groan louder than you meant to. Sans is standing next to you as you bend over to pick up the goddamn tomato can yet again. “No, I’ll be fine.” You mumble stubbornly.

“*you sure? that was definitely the fourth time you’ve dropped that.” Sans chuckles with a wink.

_Watching me again, you creep? Got nothing better to do?_

“The house isn’t much farther away…”

“*if you insist.” He replies casually.

“Yes, I-“ You were about to bark at him for babying you again. God, you fucking hate when he did that shit. But he’s already gone… that son-of-a-bitch… Probably already teleported back to his post, or home, or _fuck_ , maybe even Grillby’s. Damn, he was getting on your nerves bad today, for some reason. Probably cuz you were still a bit ashamed that he took care of you again last night. And here you were, attempting to make up for that by making them food, but he’s still trying to handicap even that. _Well, fuck him… you’ll do it yer goddamn self._

—

 

To your unexpected and bitter surprise, you are greeted at the door by Sans yet again. You don’t say a word as he holds the door open for you, making a rush past him to the kitchen. You set everything down, make a space for a cutting board and get to work.

Have to make the tortillas first…

“*i can tell you want to be a big hot-shot and do everything on your own…” Sans starts. He doesn’t bother reconsidering his request even though you send pins and needles at him with your narrowed eyes. “*but mind if i help out a bit? got time to kill during my break.”

“I guess yer not gonna leave me alone, even if I say no, huh?” You growl.

“*ouch, why so bitey?”

“Nothing…” Ok, you admit you are being overly aggressive for no reason. Sans really wasn’t doing anything wrong, but you just felt agitated with how much he was being in your space. Perhaps it was the phobia acting up…? Nah… not the same. You’d be feeling afraid or nervous if that was the case. Maybe it was just your pride getting to your head again… Fuck, you just wanted him to stop trying to help you so much. But he wasn’t going to, was he?

“I guess help if you want…” You say, toning down your stern voice.

“*whatcha want me to do?”

You hand him the can of tomatoes. “Find a way to get this open and see if they are still edible.” That’s actually a good task for him since you have no fucking clue where a can opener is… they might not even have one.

“*sure, pal.”

Just as you begin to start, flour already gets everywhere. Counter top, floor, your clothes. Now you are remembering why you didn’t like to bake shit…

You manage to mix down the powder into a dough and flatten out some disks. You hope to god they’ll taste fine. The heat in the frying pan is set and you begin to cook the tortillas. Sans left and returned with the can (somehow) opened and tasted a pinch of the tomatoes.

“*taste fine to me…”

You don’t trust his judgement all of a sudden. You take the can from him and give them a lick. They haven’t fermented but they definitely taste far from fresh as possible. Hardly any flavor left to them…. oh well.

Setting the can of tomatoes a side, you go back to flipping the tortillas on the pan.

Sans is still loitering behind you. “*anything else?”

“Nah..” You say simply. Since there was only one frying pan in this house, you couldn’t start anything else until the tortillas were done. And you didn’t quite trust him to season the mystery meat for you. He’s told you quite a bit that he _can_ cook, but you’ve yet to see it. So, sure, you were gonna be skeptical that he was somehow a better cook than his brother.

Sans lingers in the kitchen as you continue to cook. You’re starting to wonder if he’s purposely trying to rile you up… he first nosily crunches on some stale chips and then starts to pass out while standing up. He’s actually snoring. How that was possible with out proper organs was beyond you… but it was making you so irritated, you could feel your eye lid twitching like mad. You bristle angrily when he lets out yet another loud, gasping snore. What a fucking ass… You shoot a glare in his direction. He’s just standing there, swaying slightly back and forth and completely out cold. How could someone be so fucking useless? How could anyone live like he does?? You glare a little longer. The longer you stared, the easier it was to get angry at him. _Look at his stupid, fat face._ How can a skeleton even be fat? And his fucking ugly, dirty house slippers… and God knows if he ever washes that blue hoodie of his. What a filthy slob. And how is he so incredibly short too? Stupid same-height-as-you skeleton… Fuck, you wonder what goes on in that dopey looking head of his… you wonder how he’s satisfied with his fucking life…. you wonder what fucking him would be like-

…

Did your mind just blow a goddamn fuse? _The FUCK did you just…?!_

Your eyes dart to the floor as you are suddenly very aware of how loud your heartbeat is in your chest. _What. The fuck, dude._

No, that definitely wasn’t right. You were getting all worked up how everything about this fucking guy disgusted you… and somehow… 

You are afraid to look back up at him. Even though you are sure it was a mistake, a weird-ass thought that just drifted by in your moment of bitter stewing, you’re terrified of the thoughts returning if you stare again. You _never_ want that kinda thought crossing through your mind again.

Ok… chill the fuck out, you dip-shit. It’s nothing. Weird thoughts happen to the best of us sometimes. Just stay calm and act like it never-

“*hey, i know you’re probably a great cook and all, but should that actually be smoking…?”

 _Oh, shit!_ Sans’ comment snaps you back and the smell finally grabs your attention. The last tortilla is burning to crisps and sending black smoke into the air. You hastily turn off the stove and move the frying pan to a cooler burner. _Goddamnit, get out of your fucking head and just focus on dinner…_

“*you cool? you looked like you were frozen stiff there for a minute. that why you needed the fire?” Sans chuckles.

You still refuse to look at him, or acknowledge his awful humor. “Shut up… I was just thinking about shit. Got distracted…” You couldn’t get your voice to sound even to save your life. You’re pretty sure Sans notices it too. But he says nothing on it. Hopefully it just comes off as your pride being hurt by the clumsy mistake.

You look back to your progress. One lost tortilla won’t make a difference… you still had plenty to eat. Once the pan is cool, you clean it out and start to work on your chorizo substitute. For the rest of the time, you ignore Sans as much as possible. And thank god, he barely says much else until dinner is ready and Papyrus has made it home.

—

 

“HUMAN!! THIS LOOKS SO WONDERFULLY INTERESTING!!! I CAN’T WAIT TO TRY IT…” Papyrus barely gets his scarf off from around his neck as he shambles over to the table where you have dinner laid out. It’s not much to look at, you think. The tortillas didn’t fry evenly, so some are a bit more crusty in places than others. The cheese looks clumpy and unappetizing. And the tomatoes… turned into a mushy mess when you tried to heat them up in a sauce pan. Whatever… hopefully it tastes fine.

You have each piece of food on separate plates and pans for individual serving. And you managed to scavenge out 3 extra plates for everyone to eat off of. You gave yourself the chipped plate, while the brothers got bigger, decent looking ones.

“*care to show us how this is done?” Sans asked.

You hesitate for a moment but then begin to serve yourself. Both of the brothers seem to be watching you curiously, more for your lack of conversation than from curiosity.

“ARE YOU OKAY??” Papyrus asked, lightly tapping on your shoulder. You flinch, but barely enough to be noticed.

“Yeah, sorry… a bit spacey.” You laugh off. That seems to convince him.

As you situate two tortillas on your plate, you take ahold of the serving spoon for the meat. “So you just put a little meat in the middle of each tortilla like so…” You demonstrate and Papyrus makes a weird, high-pitched noise. You think he’s enjoying this too much. “Then take some of the tomatoes and put them on. And then a handful of the cheese to top it off.” Then you proceed to wrap up the tortilla like you always have and take a bit. Papyrus is thrilled to no end.

“INCREDIBLE! AND IT LOOKS SO EASY TO EAT!!”

“Can be… or if you stuff them too much, they start to fall apart… so be care-“ But it’s too late. Papyrus is already spooning three times the amount of meat you had on his own tortillas. You shrug. “Well, have fun eating that, I spose.”

Just as Sans starts to serve himself, Papyrus takes his first bite and melts into a puddle of happiness. “HUMAN… IT TASTES WONDERFUL! SO NEW!! SO FLAVORFUL!!”

He’s right, for once. The cheese did end up tasting delightful, despite its awful odor. Really tied in the strange meat flavor. This was definitely nothing like the tacos from home, but you thought you did pretty good.

“*great job, buddy. i dig it.”

You barely smile back at Sans, avoiding eye contact. You still feel too fucking weird from earlier.

“YOU DEFINITELY HAVE TO SHOW ME HOW TO MAKE THIS AGAIN, HUMAN!! AND PERHAPS… I CAN PERFECT IT!”

“Yeah, sure thing…” You say, humoring him. You doubted he could actually make tacos taste any better than this, but sure… knock yourself out dude.

Sitting around the small coffee table on the floor for a meal never bothered you before. But now that you are sitting next to a skeleton that tends to rub you the wrong way and yet had a brief fuck fantasy about, you want nothing more than to finish your meal quickly and think of an excuse to leave… You know the moment you can have sometime to yourself to regain composure, you won’t have this awkward feeling lingering over you anymore. But being alone hasn’t happened yet with the goddamn lazybones dragging ass around you all day as you cooked…

 _Of all things to crave, too._ Sure, it’s been a while since you’ve been laid, but really…? Are you suddenly that desperate and confused that your brain thinks fear and fucking are the same now? You accidentally let a frustrated sigh escape you. The two brothers glance at you but don’t question it, thankfully. You take that opportunity to down more food into your mouth so that you can excuse yourself.

And of course, Sans leg brushes yours as you are standing up. You feel your skin prickle and crawl with disgust, which causes you to hastily bail to the kitchen way too fast.

“HUMAN??” Papyrus calls after you. Great, now they definitely can tell your fucking whack right now.

“Sorry, just tripped…” You lie.

You quickly rinse your plate off and go back towards the living room, making a beeline for the door. “Well, hope you guys don’t mind washing up the dishes since I cooked- uh… I gotta go do something see ya.” Words couldn’t have gracelessly tumbled out of your fucking mouth any faster. You slam the door behind you and march straight for the shed.

_Fuck me in the ass. Gotta unwind._

Now of all times, you wish you had access to a hot shower to stand in and escape too. You considered braving the cold and showering out back this time instead of waiting for the brothers to go to bed and cleaning yourself off in the kitchen. No, fuck it. Just wait again tomorrow. One extra day of no bathing won’t matter too much… you hoped.

God, though, being alone in your bed and under the covers is what you needed right now. Time to fucking chill out and cleanse your mind’s palette with some music or something.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is named after the song Don't Stand So Close To Me by The Police.


	16. Too Drunk To Fuck

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which a question is asked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, boy was this chapter weird to write. It's a bit sudden, short and choppy, but I am satisfied with that. I mean, have you ever been really drunk and it feels like somethings just go by really fast and suddenly, giving you hardly any time to process it? Yeah... kinda what I'm going for here.  
> The punk sure does need to lay off the booze at some point, yeh?

The snow covered forest was still. Nothing stirred. All was still asleep. Except one particular someone.

A soft melody on a brass instrument rises through the trees. Just like always…

_Except…_

The melody sputters a bit and pauses… then starts again. Slow… builds… stays strong… then sputters out.

“God FUCKING damnit…” You practically throw your trumpet down into the snow. Your face is burning hot with frustration and shame…

You would of thought a decent few hours of sleep would have cured your fucked up head already… but no. All morning as you wandered out here first thing in the morning, your mind kept drifting back to the idea of _sleeping_ with a _skeleton._ Why this was such a curious thought all of sudden, you had no fucking clue. But it was getting agonizing. If felt wrong and, quite frankly, hypocritical of you. First fear, now lust. Made no sense.

Some sort of strange version of stock-holm syndrome? _Who fucking knew…_

“Goddamnit, stop it!” You smack the side of your face a few times. “I just wanted to play some music before work…”

Luckily, Chilldrake or his friends weren’t here this morning. You didn’t want to have to explain why your playing was off.

You spent a moment digging the bottom of your palms onto your eyelids, massaging and pressing hard to hopefully help you focus.

“HUMAN?”

You shriek a bit and jump back. Papyrus stood only a few feet away, looking at you with such concern. “Sorry… you startled me.”

“ARE YOU ALRIGHT? I COULD HEAR BACK THERE THAT YOUR PLAYING WASN’T AS EXQUISITE AS IT USUALLY IS…” He walked up to you and observed that your instrument had been tossed down.

“I dunno, Papyrus… I guess my rhythm is off this morning…”

“OR PERHAPS EVEN LAST NIGHT??”

You look up at him sheepishly. “Huh?”

“YOU WERE ACTING QUITE OFF LAST NIGHT…. WELL, MORE THAN USUAL. I KNOW WE MIGHT STILL SCARE YOU A BIT… BUT IT SEEMED DIFFERENT LAST NIGHT. EVERYTHING OK?? YOU CAN CONFIDE IN A FRIEND LIKE THE GREAT PAPYRUS!!”

“Oh, uhh…” Definitely wasn’t a good idea to share your dirty-ass thoughts about his brother with him… “No, I was just tired last night. I dunno… perhaps music will have to wait another day…”

Papyrus bent down and scooped up your trumpet. He tentatively dusted off the snow around its valves and handed it back to you. The brass was freezing cold to the touch now.

“DO NOT LET IT DEFEAT YOU SO EASILY, HUMAN!!!” Papyrus said with much epic sound in his voice. “THOUGH YOU LOST THE BATTLE TODAY, YOU CAN ALWAYS COME BACK STRONG TOMORROW!! SO DON’T FRET OVER IT, HUMAN. YOU WILL DO GREAT NEXT TIME!!” He gave you a huge, friendly grin.

“Gee, thanks man…” You said. His words were sincere and rather touching.

Papyrus opened his arms and offered you a hug. He had done this much before but you usually declined due to feeling awkward and nervous about it. But today, you made an exception. You walked over and embraced him. His long arms were actually very comfortable. He was a good hugger. And thankfully, your phobia didn’t stir up a bit. You weren’t really hugging a skeleton, but a friend.

 

…

 

“Grillby, one more, please…” You ask, your hand swaying over the bar as you grab his attention.

_Yes._

You were drinking _again._

Because, okay… though Papyrus’ words had helped you enough to not be so bothered by the thoughts, you’d much rather completely drown them out with booze. Seemed like a good idea at the time. But it was definitely taking a lot to make it happen.

You were on your fifth or sixth drink… or something. And all you had to do was stay here until closing time and go straight home into your shed. Didn’t have to worry about eating with the skeletons tonight since you ate dinner at work. So hopefully, if you didn’t run into the lazybones, then you should have no trouble tonight. And hopefully, you’d be cured of this nonsense once and for all tomorrow…

Grillby came over to you with another drink and set it down in front of you. You took it eagerly and downed a good third of it. Wiping your lips with the back of your hand, you lean forward, feeling the need to try and socialize with your boss.

“Y’know Grillby…” You start. You wait to see that the fire monster was going to stay standing in front of you to listen.

But of course he does… no one else is in the pub at this hour. He’s got nothing better to do…

“Could you enlighten me about Sans? I mean… I practically live with the guy… but he… he’s so weird, right?”

Grillby just stands there perfectly still, minus the licking of the fire on his head. You take that as he is listening to you but just doesn’t answer… because he never does.

“He’s just got such a bizarre air to him. I don’t get him at all. And he’s always smiling, right? But not really… most of the time, I can tell it’s a fake smile… the kinda smile you put on for show, but yer actually hiding what you are really feeling…”

To your delight, Grillby actually nods in agreement with you. So you continue:

“He just seems to be hiding a lot of shit all the time. And he covers it up with smiling and jokes… awful, awful jokes… they're not even funny…” You shrug and take another big gulp of your drink. You feel more of the alcohol buzz through you… the drink just before this one was starting to kick in.

Grillby is still watching you. It was hard to tell if he was still listening to humor you or was actually interested.

“Why is he hiding shit, Grillby? I feel like he’s even hiding shit from his brother… the only person I can think of that he’d actually trust. Who does that?” You sway a bit and your brow hardens a bit. “Why… do I even care…?”

You look back up at Grillby. He merely shrugs but then points to the front of the door.

You look over your shoulder and nearly fall out of your seat.

“*sup?” Sans is shuffling his way over to the bar to join you two. He takes his hoodie off of his head and gives it a shake to relieve it of the snow powder forming on the top.

As he climbs up onto the stool next to you, you shoot him a glare. “How long… were you standing there listenin’?”

“*listening to what?” Sans asks, innocently. He gives you a wink.

 _Fuck this guy… fuck this… fuck him…_ You give your head a shake and look away. “Why’re yeh even here?” There is slight menace in your tone even as your words start to slur.

“*grillbz told me you were here and would probably need an escort home.”

You turn to Grillby with the look of utmost betrayal. “C’mon, Grillby… I’m totallyca-capable of walking home ‘lone…” And yet, your dramatic hiccups and stumbling of words said otherwise.

Grillby merely shakes his head and folds his arms over his chest.

You groan dramatically. “Fine… then I’ll have one more… n’ call it a night.”

Grillby seems hesitant to give you another beverage. But he makes you one anyway… you think you see him half the alcohol amount in this one. But you aren’t sure.

Once he hands it to you, you down it all instantly. You cough a bit then look over to Sans. “Whas the time…”

“*five ’til closing.” Sans answers simply.

You groan again. You didn’t want to hang out here with Sans a whole five minutes until closing time. You’d rather get the escorting over with, and be alone in your shed. Their shed. Whatever.

“Alright les go.. I don’t wanna waste dis buzz.” You teeter off the stool and make a clumsy shamble for the door.

“*thanks, grillby.” You hear Sans say and follow you out into the cold.

You make an effort to walk on your own, but eventually Sans grabs your arm and hoists it over his shoulders. Just like always…

As you walk through the snow, you keep glancing over at him. He’s still smiling.

“Sans, why d’you always smile when you aren’t act’lly happy?” You ask.

He looks over at you a bit surprised. He looks like he’s made of liquid from how much booze has hit you now.

“*i don’t quite follow ya, buddy. i’m smiling right now cuz you look ridiculous trying so hard to hold your pride and walk on your own.”

“That’s not… I’m not jest talk’n about now.” You grumble.

The snow is falling awfully hard tonight. Made no sense how a cave could have different amounts of snow fall…

“You always smile or shrug shit off…. but it always looks forced. I can still tell yer bother’d by somethin’.”

Sans is quite for a moment as he leads you on. You’ve passed the ‘Librarby’ now.

“*what makes you say that?”

“Cuz I use to do the same thing… all my friends did too…”

Sans makes a small sound. Kinda sounds like a sigh, but not really. It came from deep within his rib cage.

“*guess its just a better thing to do for the people around you, you know? we all have gloomy thoughts on our minds living trapped under a mountain. so by smiling and trying to bring joy to others, it helps keep the negative energy in check. ya feel me?”

You mull the thought over a bit. Sorta makes sense… but that seemed like a lot of will power to do… Perhaps he has had a lot of practice.

“You need some real cheerin’ up…”

Sans shrugs under you. “*i get by. the music lessons have been a good help.”

“Cool…”

You both make it to the house. Sans helps you in and sets you down on the couch.

“Am I staying here tonight?”

“*yeah. it’s a good idea in case you need anything.”

“Oh…” You sit there a moment, staring down at his feet.

“*you alright?”

You don’t respond for a moment. Just keep staring and notice how dirty his slippers are. They’ve practically lost all the color to them.

“…Yeah.” You finally say.

“*i’ll get you some water.”

You look up and watch him go into the kitchen. You just realized your smiling. You just realized that you feel absolutely great. God, did you love alcohol. All the sickness and vomiting and hangovers you’ve experienced were worth it… for this moment. That moment when you’ve hit your peak and gave no shits anymore and felt just awesome.

And Sans… He should feel awesome with you, shouldn’t he? Yeah…. no more of this fake smiling shit. You’ve been a serious ass to him. He’s been helping you out a lot, honestly. Sure, he could be an annoying fuck about it, but he meant well. And you should help him out too.

You actually wanted to help him. You didn’t feel obligated, at least you don’t think… you genuinely wanted to make him feel better.

“Sans…” You call to him.

“*sup?” He called back.

“You got any alcohol here?”

“*buddy, you don’t need anymore…”

“Not for me… for you…”

Sans was back in the living room, giving you a questioning look. “*nah, thanks. i don’t really want a drink.”

“Ah, c’mon, man..” You hold out your hands to him, smiling. “You just said yer self you got bad thoughts. Let’s have a good time. Get a buzz with me and you can feel better…”

“*it doesn’t work like that for me.” Sans said simply. He holds out a water cup for you.

You shake your head. “Nah, don’t want it. It’ll kill this great buzz I got.”

Sans shrugs and puts it down to the side of the couch. “*well, then its here for later.”

“Sans.”

“*yeah, bucko?”

“You wanna fuck then?”

He’s staring down at you. You are trying to stare back up into his face, to gauge his reaction. It’s no use though… he’s too blurry from how far away he’s standing.

“*…i think you’ve had a bit too much.” That wasn’t an answer. You really wanted a straight answer.

“But do you want to?” There is almost an eager desperation in your voice. If you were sober, you’d feel ashamed how desperate you sounded. But right now, it didn’t matter. You had hoped that this strange sexual tension would have been mutual on some level. That you could be sexually attractive enough to have a person want you somewhat as much as you did them. But…

This was Sans. He was a monster. And you were a human. And this was a very awkward situation that probably hasn’t been addressed… ever. Besides… just because you thought you were a decent looking person, didn’t mean you could sleep with _whoever_ the fuck you wanted.

“*don’t know if having this conversation is worth it from how much you’ve had to drink.”

You look down now, feeling a bit small and unwanted, plus a little guilty for expecting so much. The buzz was starting to decline now. All that good energy was fleeting quickly.

“*hey.”

You look back up. Sans sat next to you on the couch. “*let’s talk about this in the morning, yeah? i mean, i don’t really know the full deets of how alcohol effects humans but… you may feel different about what you’re asking when you are sober tomorrow.”

You nod slowly as a glassy wave floods your vision. It was getting harder to see him now even when he was sitting right next to you. You think you see him bend over the couch. He’s handing you something. You look down at your own hand as he carefully takes it in his own and places the water cup firmly in your grasp.

“*drink up, you’ll need it. believe me.”

You down the water and smack your lips a bit, feeling out how your head felt. “More?”

“*sure.” He got up and walked into the kitchen again.

You slowly sink down on the couch and tuck yourself under the blanket that had been left out for you. Suddenly, you just wanted to hide from all of this. The buzz was declining more, and you definitely gave a fuck again. You felt embarrassed.

“*here you go.” Sans had come back and was holding out more water for you.

“Nevermind…” You mumble as you cover your face with the blanket.

“*ok. i’ll leave it here for you if you change your mind.” He set it down near your head on the floor.

“I’m sorry.” You say simply under the covers.

“*nah, don’t worry about it.” But you aren’t sure if he’s referring to the water cup or the fucking awkward question you dropped on him a moment ago.

“*night.” He calls as he heads up the stairs.

“Yeah…” You mumble as you try to bury yourself deeper into the couch, along with your shameful feelings.

You weren’t sure what you were expecting. That whole situation went as awkward as it possibly could have. Sans gave no sign of care or interest in your sudden proposal. And he definitely didn’t hesitate to bail out as fast as he could… God, you’ve just made things worse for yourself around here didn’t you? And now he was probably gonna be weird around you too. _Great…_ Let’s see how fucking swell this next morning would go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is named after the song "Too Drunk To Fuck" by Dead Kennedys.


	17. The World's A Mess, It's In My Kiss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fun times and fuckin' terrifying times for the punk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since the last chapter was such a short update, have another that's more awkward and exciting. Heh heh...  
> Enjoy.
> 
> BTW, today's my birthday! And I will be away from this work for a while now so stay tuned for the next update a bit later.

You are awoken the next day with the smell of burning eggs and flustered shouting from Papyrus.

“NOOO!! HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN?? THEY’VE NEVER BURNED BEFORE!!”

You groan and peek and eye open to see Papyrus struggling with a frying pan and spatula in the kitchen.

“Hmm…” you grumble. Your head didn’t feel so bad today as you thought it might. Guess the water did the trick this time.

“NEEHHH!! THESE EGGS WERE GONNA HELP THE HUMAN FEEL BETTER…” He frets loudly, as he turns the eggs over several time to see if they are salvageable.

“I’m fine…” You call from the couch as you slowly begin to ascend. “It’s cool, dude…”

“OH, YOU ARE AWAKE!! OH, HUMAN, SANS TOLD ME YOU WERE FEELING BAD AGAIN LAST NIGHT FROM DRINKING. I WAS GOING TO MAKE YOU MY SPECIAL EGGS AGAIN TO MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER… BUT…”

“Thanks, but I feel fine.” You say. And feel bad? Why would Sans say-

You notice that the lazybones was sitting on the floor at the coffee table, looking half asleep. There was a potato chip bag sitting in front of him. You suddenly felt very tense and alert. _Ugh…_

“HUMAN, I WILL STILL MAKE YOU SOME NEW EGGS!!”

“No, no.” You say suddenly and make surprising speed to join him in the kitchen, almost tripping on the tangled blanket in the process. “I can make them, don’t worry about it. You’ve got work to go to, don’t you? Don’t want you to be late.”

“OH BUT… WELL… ALRIGHT. I AM SORRY THEY TURNED OUT BURNT! I PROMISE, THEY WON’T BE NEXT TIME!!” Papyrus declares.

“Don’t even worry about it.” You say, giving him a reassuring smile. Besides, the excuse to be occupied with cooking was wonderful. You could hang out in here while those two left for work… and stall some time from a possible awkward conversation.

“WELL ALRIGHT. GLAD TO HEAR YOU ARE DOING OKAY!!”

You nod, chuckling to yourself. That guy worried too much.

Papyrus grabbed his scarf off the counter and fussed over his brother to wake up. “WE’LL BE LATE!!” He kept saying. They both finally make it out the door and the air around you feels so relieving, you might just want to curl back up on the couch and return to sleep. But you were already in the process of cooking eggs… so… you might as well finish them and eat some breakfast.

You start to scrape the eggs onto a plate when you hear shuffling of feet on the carpet in the living room. You bite down on your lower lip and sigh… _Fuck. Did he come back?_

You peek your head around the corner to see Sans stepping into his slippers and lazily kicking his sneakers up against the wall and out of the way. He then turns and catches your eye. _Well… no getting out of this now_. You swallow hard, feeling your head quickly burn up.

“*those eggs turn out better?” he asks, casually. There’s no hint of nerves or awkwardness in is tone. He seems completely unbothered. The usual lack of any care kinda pisses you off…

“Yeah.” You say simply. You go to sit down on the ground next to the coffee table and start to fork up some of the scrambled eggs. He sits down across from you, his gaze completely fixed on your plate. You occasionally stare back up in between bites.

“*mind if i try some?”

“Knock yourself out…” You push your plate kinda towards the middle. He reaches out and plucks some of the egg bits off your plate. _Slob… He could have at least asked to use your fork…_

His jaw bone opens and the egg disappears quickly into his mouth. You realize this is the first time you’ve actually observed him eat something… and probably the first time you’ve seen him open his damn mouth.

“*not bad.”

“Thanks…”

There’s a pause.

“You not going to work today?”

“*nah, i will. just taking my time.”

Another beat of silence.

“*so…you-“

“I’m really sorry I brought that shit up last night…” You interrupt him. Suddenly, you don’t feel like having this conversation, afraid to know which direction it was going to go. You honestly didn’t want it to go in any direction now… You’d rather not be rejected or denied, but you also were having second thoughts about any sort of sexual interaction. Because… well…. _he was still a skeleton_. And it’s still a fucking terrifying thought.

“*hey, it’s fine. i know i’ve said some out-there stuff when i drank.”

 _Good to know he does actually drink at all._ You just nod, hoping this conversation will just die out already.

“*but as i was saying…” he starts again, watching you carefully. “*feel any different than last night?”

“You mean would I still ask that question again?” You try so hard to keep your voice steady. You’re doing a surprisingly good job, even with your heart trying to hammer a hole through your chest.

“*yeah.”

“Um… like I said, I feel like I shouldn’t have brought it up.” You explain, the nerves over taking you. “I just… The thought crossed my mind… and to be honest… I think I’m just getting super lonely… and it’s been a while since the last time I got laid so I’m… kinda desperate….” You look up and suddenly realize how bad that sounded from seeing his face turn a bit sour. “I mean no offense dude! It’s just… you know, yer a skeleton and all…”

“*alright.” His face goes back to that normal, standard, fake-ass grin. “*but you didn’t really answer me.”

“…What was the question again?” You ask, your voice cracking a bit. God, when did you suddenly get so sweaty?

“*would you ask me again now that you’re sober?”

Why did he have to be a skeleton…? His face is so hard to read. What is that look he’s giving? Is he content or irritated? Or interested? Who **fucking** knew?!

“D-did you want me to ask it again?” You reply, as smooth as sand paper.

“*still not an answer.”

“I don’t… I don’t… really know.”

“*alright….” he says. You think he sounds a bit disappointed. “*don’t know is not a yes… so… let’s say it’s a different question…”

There’s another pause. So you ask: “Like what?”

“*it’s up to you… ask a question you feel comfortable asking of me.”

“Uh…” Now you weren’t sure if he was meaning in the same topic as the original… perhaps fucking was a bit much. And maybe _impossible_ , to be honest.

So you looked down at your plate and tried to think, tried to ignore the loud beating in your ears and the warm, sticky feeling on your palms.

Why would you have asked him that in the first place? Perhaps you are just horny as fuck… perhaps you simply desire some company… or intimacy… But was that possible with this phobia?

“Would you… wanna try… making out?” It sounded so elementary for some reason. You felt like asking such a question put you back in your prepubescent years where you had no experience towards sexuality. Honestly, it wasn’t a _bad_ question… just…. weird coming from you…. towards a skeleton.

You thought you saw his grin spread just a bit wider. But now came the part where you would know if he was actually interested in the first place or was just leading you on for fun.

“*sure.”

You’re a bit stunned. You blink a few times. “Okay… cool.”

Neither of you move from your spot on the floor. The air still feels fucking weird. “So uh… since I don’t really know how monsters work… um… dunno how we would do this… and also your just a skeleton… so…”

Sans chuckles with some amusement. “*told ya before… i’m a monster, not a human skeleton. my rules are different.” He flashes a wink at you. That wink definitely has a different sentiment coming from him now. Your face is feeling a bit flushed.

“*tell me… how do humans make out?”

“Uh…” Awfully weird having to explain such a thing. “Well, for me personally, I like hard mashing of lips… but…” You look back at him and specifically towards his mouth which has no lips. “I, uh, also enjoy tonguing and biting on the lower lip.”

“*alright. think i can manage that.”

And as if that’s enough invitation to proceed, he gets up off the floor and walks to your side. You quickly stand too, feeling a rush of adrenaline pump through you. You were a bit nervous how this would work. And seeing his face so close now… seeing all the skull-like details up and personal… fear was starting to creep up into your mind.

He made the first move. He began to lean forward, his eye-sockets almost level with your own. Having him this close, you could tell now that he might just be a hair or two shorter than you. You tired your best to keep a steady eye contact… but his empty sockets suddenly looked like deep, never ending holes of black. That you could easily fall in and never climb out. There was something very unsettling about that image in your head. But you couldn’t look away… and the closer he got, the more you felt the panic growing.

You thought you saw his mouth begin to part open when you pulled away, panting a bit. Your heart was racing a million miles an hour and shivers were running all up your skin.

“S-sorry… I, uh…” This was fucking embarrassing. This phobia was maybe too much. “I dunno if I can do this actually…” You admit.

Sans backs off a bit, that look of what you think is disappointment returning. “*well, can’t say i didn’t assume that…”

His comment definitely made you feel guilty, even though you’re sure it shouldn’t. “Wait… maybe… if I closed my eyes…” You bite your lip. “I’m sorry that sounds bad, but… you understand, right?”

“*yeah, ‘corse.”

“Sorry…”

“*don’t worry about it.”

So you close your eyes. You’ve braced yourself… for either this would go horribly wrong or… hopefully alright.

There’s a brief pause. Then his teeth are upon your lips, working them open. A warm tongue slips into your mouth and toys your own a bit. It’s a bit shocking at first and you almost open your eyes in surprise, but you manage to settle yourself and try to go along with it. How the fuck were you suppose to know a skeleton would have a tongue anyway?

He tasted like eggs… and surprisingly not at all like potato chips… but you paid no mind to that. You probably tasted like eggs yourself.

His tongue was a bit strange. There’s no moisture but a pleasant warmth that was very inviting. It coaxed you in. Pretty soon, it felt comfortable and you press back.

And there you were. Making out with a goddamn skeleton. Could you see yourself doing this a year ago? Or even a month ago? _Fuck no._

But it was surprisingly nice, minus the few moments of weird thoughts trying to cross your mind. It was a lot of work to keep telling yourself you were making out with just another person and not your worst nightmare. Besides, he was averagely good. Not the best you’ve experienced, but he had less to work with on your behalf.

The moment he experimented by giving your lip a nip, a pleasant sigh escaped you. It must have excited him, because you felt his arms embrace you and pull you closer. He was awfully eager. He couldn’t get enough of you. His tongue twisted and tug your own as much as possible, trying to touch every bit that it could. You pressed back, a bit eager yourself. You felt this attention might be going a bit to your head, but hey… it felt pretty good to be desired. You missed that quite a bit.

His grip started to get a bit tighter on you. His tongue was getting more forceful… and you were losing the momentum. It felt more like he was strangling you at this point. So you push him away… maybe a bit to roughly. But he seems to have gotten the right message.

“*my bad…” He says, straightening his hoodie around his front a bit.

“It’s okay.” You reply simply, fixing your own clothes a bit. A wonder how those kind of things always got so disarrayed from ‘macking.

“*guess it’s just kinda exciting to try something that new.”

“Yeah, tell me about it. Never thought I’d, well…shit…” You trail off, flushing a bit. You’re a bit self conscious of the satisfied, dopey grin that’s permanently etched on your face.

He grins back, giving you another wink. “*and hey, can’t say i wouldn’t be down for other new things. just let me know if you are interested in anything else.”

“Yeah okay…” Damn, did you sound out of breath. _Pull your fucking self together…_

“*i’m going to work now. cya.” And he’s out the door without another word.

The house is a bit too quite, to the point to where it’s awfully loud.

You collapse on your knees with slight grace. The padding of the carpet helped with that. You stare down at the fine detail of each individual carpet thread. _Wow… that happened._

You chuckle a bit to yourself. Wait until you tell the Hoodrats. Not only have you been giving music lessons to a skeleton… but you’ve also french kissed him. What will they think of that..?! You’re grin vanishes when you think of Andrew’s reaction. Would he be jealous? _Ahhh.. fucking damnit._ You just hoped you could at least know either way… If you could at least make it back to the surface to have a chance to tell them all your crazy, unbelievable time down here.

“C’mon, don’t fucking put yourself in the dumps after that… that’s fucking rude.” You shake your head a bit and push the thoughts away. You stand back up and grab your plate of eggs. There was still quite a bit of them left on the plate. You scrape them into your mouth like a dirty heathen and take your dishes to the kitchen. Your legs still felt a bit numb with each step from the shock. It was a good kinda shock, you told yourself. You set the dishes down on the stove next to the dirty pan.

Time to start the day… but what was there to do? You had the day off today… so no work. Maybe a nice walk in the forest alone?

Your mind refuses to go to anything else practical. You think again about how warm his tongue was. You’re trying to gauge just how much of it you actually enjoyed and how much you were just being a hormonal desperate animal…

Would you want to try other shit with Sans? _Fuck…_ it was hard enough to start anything unless your eyes were closed. But maybe…

“Fuck you, you horny fucking bitch. Just… give it some time.” You mumble to yourself. You look back to the dishes in front of you. You decide to leave them be and go for a walk after all.

 

…

 

You’ve got your trumpet in hand as you trudge through the bright, snowy clearing. The trees were just about to start getting dense around you as you make your way into the forest.

There’s an odd combination of emotions sloshing through your head. Each step with the left foot, and the thoughts went to how this new situation with Sans could be interesting… could be a very helpful (and healthier) form of distraction. Each step with the right foot, and your mind went the opposite direction… how _fucking weird_ this shit was in retrospect… How much of an ass you were being to assume this was mutually a distraction for the both of you. How were you suppose to know his perspective on the matter? The lazybones was so fucking hard to read… And the dude was never up for a lot of conversation; a man of few words.

This back and forth made your head feel heavy. But on the bright side, your mood was improved quite a bit, despite it all. So you’d take this opportunity to play some tunes in the woods.

A small, guilty part of you was hoping you’d run into Sans on your mini adventure out. Part of you wanted to play a pumped up good tune that you were sure he’d hear. This was, well… you liked trying to let the other know that they improved your attitude by being… quite frankly… a goddamn showoff. You think you got it from your brother… he was One Man Show, after all.

…And immediately that thought was plucked out of your brain and tucked into your back pocket; you’d face that one another day.

You did not run into Sans on your way to the woods, but another fellow that would only make your mood even better. The smaller armored dog was pacing back and forth through the snow in front of his sentry station. His tail was swishing back and forth excitedly the moment he spotted you coming closer, and yet he tried is very best to look like he was still concentrating on his guard job.

“Hey, buddy… Having a good morning so far?”

The moment you gave him notice, the dog gave up all hope of trying to look professional. His whole attention was on you now… tongue flopping, tail wagging, eyes sparkling.

“I’ll take that as a yes.” You chuckle. “I’m gonna play some music over here, do you mind?”

The dog only began to wiggle his butt harder with the force of his mighty tail wags. Clearly, this notion thrilled him.

You lift your instrument high and played a few scales, warming its brass to tune it. Then, once you were satisfied, the melodies began.

The Lesser Dog got into a groove with your song as he kicked and sprayed snow flurry all around him. You played loud and strong, through excitement and hope that this would carry far enough to the edge of the snowy forest… and hopefully both skeleton brothers would hear it and appreciate it. After all… you chose to play “This One Goes Out To…” by Streetlight. Because, you were a fucking goddamn sap. The melody was a bit lacking without the other brass instruments… and in your own dorky way, you imagined Sans playing the trombone part along with you if he could. It was a simple one anyway…. perhaps you’ll see if he wants to learn it later tonight.

And of course as the song hit the chorus, the lyrics naturally filled your head…

_‘ ~Hey, I don’t understand ~ But I’d like to anyway ~ Hey, I don’t understand ~ But I like it anyway ~ Hey, I don’t understand ~ But I like you anyway ~ I don’t understand, HEY, I don’t understand ~ I don’t understand, HEY, I don’t understand~ ’_

The dog barked wildly for a moment and you couldn’t help but smile under your instrument’s mouth piece… he must really be into it too. Only after he started to bark again, did you notice that his gaze was looking off past you. The song was almost over… you had only a minute left of notes to play, but as your eyes fixated on where the dog was looking, the song died off abruptly.

A large figure was walking towards you several miles off. Their huge, bulky armor was dark and stood out brightly against the white snow. Something about this figure was off… and you felt… intimidated. Their air was not friendly at all. And your gut was suddenly screaming at you to bolt and hide.

So you did.

You gave the Lesser Dog a brief pat on the head and made a fast march away towards the trees, trying your best to not look suspicious. You weren’t sure if the figure could get a good look at you from the distance you were at, but you were sure they saw you at the very least. So the last thing you wanted to do was run and look guilty… because you had a horrible guess that that large, scary mother fucker coming your way could be this Undyne person the skeletons kept talking about.

You made it past a few trees and out of decent eye sight before you looked back over your shoulder. They were still coming this way and at an alarming pace, but hadn’t quite made it to the dog’s post yet. God, they must be over six feet tall with that fucking huge stride. Another time where being short was goddamn awful. You pick up the pace just a bit to get in the full tree clover, and then burst into a sprint. If you remember correctly, there was a path just ahead that would lead to the other sentry stations and hopefully… just fucking hopefully… one of the skeletons would be there to help you hide.

Your breath starts to get heavy and painful once you’ve made it to the next sentry post… the one that was definitely the second to next, but you skipped the disgustingly sappy dog couple. This one belonged to Papyrus…. but to your dismay, he was no where to be found. Foot steps crunching in the snow could be heard faintly echoing behind you… or was that your imagination? You didn’t want to find out.

You keep sprinting on, forcing the stinging amounts of oxygen through your lungs as you went. You swear to God, if Sans wasn’t at his post and already taking a break from his goddamn job, you just might kill him. It was just a bit further-

“HUMAN?”

You gasp and come to a halt. Papyrus was standing off to the side of the path, his hands on his hips, looking suddenly alert and surprised to see you here.

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING?? WHY ARE YOU RUNNING??”

“Shhh! SHH!” You flail towards him and practically cover your hands over his mouth. He only continues to stare down at you, puzzled even more.

“I think…” You gasp, still trying to recover from your run. “..Undyne… I think she’s… coming.”

Papyrus’ non existent, and yet visibly existent eyes bugged out of his skull. “WHAT?!?” (that was another mystery you could never solve).

Before you can say another word, he scoops you up in his arms and rushes toward Sans’ station. If it was any other time you just might have squealed in alarm, but in this moment, you are thankful to have assistance from a taller, longer legged friend to escape your threat.

He comes to an abrupt halt in front of the sentry post and practically flings you back behind it on the floor board. The wind is almost knocked out of you as you slam into the back of it. You look up, a bit dazed to see Sans… completely unfazed by all the commotion and dead asleep. You take a moment to stare up at him on his stool seat in disbelief at how much more lazier he was marking himself in your book, but then snap back to your current situation. You press yourself as flat against the back of the sentry wall as you could and listen carefully.

 _Nothing…_ An eerie silence followed for several moments.

The silence is briefly broken by Sans’ snorts as he begins to wake up. His pin-pricked eyes in his sockets blink several times as he takes in the scenery around him, then slowly looks down to see you cowering below him.

“*sup-“

You shoot him a desperate look and hold your index finger to your mouth. You must look terrified enough, because he slowly looks back up and puts on the most deadpan, fake, yet casual smile you’ve ever seen him make. He scans the area but seems to see nothing that could be the source of the trouble.

Then you hear Papyrus faintly in the distance, getting closer. He sounds to be desperately explaining something to someone. And then you hear the other heavy, metallic clangs of foot steps accompanying him.

“-I KNOW YOU LIKE TO CHECK IN EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE, BUT THIS IS VERY UNEXPECTED. YOU WERE JUST IN SNOWDIN TWO DAYS AGO. WHY ARE YOU OUT HERE NOW??”

“Got tipped off that some strange piles of residue were left behind in the trees around Snowdin… you know, like the ones that strange small dog was leaving? But bigger… So I looked into it… and I think they might be from a human.”

You shut your eyes tightly and curse yourself in your own head. If you make it out of this alive… you fucking swore you would start burying your goddamn shits deeper in the snow from now on.

“HUMAN RESIDUE??? AHH… ARE YOU SURE THAT IS A THING?? I COULD HAVE SWORN ONLY ANNOYING LITTLE DOGS COULD PRODUCE SUCH DIRTY, USELESS THINGS…”

“*sup, undyne.” Sans chimes in.

Undyne seems to not make any sort of response towards the lazybones and angrily barks towards Papyrus. “*I’ve TOLD you so many times!! Residue is one of the few things to look out for… Humans aren’t capable of absorbing food all the way like we do so they dump waste!!”

“AHH… OF COURSE. HOW COULD I FORGET??”

You bite down hard on your lower lip, trying your best not to shake. Fucking Papyrus was not playing this smooth enough…

“*well you know another thing that makes residue are dogs. and on that topic…” Sans begins, casually slouching over his post stand. You think he’s mostly doing it to cover up any sight of you. “*i’ve seen a much larger dog roaming around lately.”

There is a pause. Fucking christ, you hope she’d go for that bait.

“*Is that so….” Undyne grumbles rather loudly. “*I wouldn’t be surprised if another annoying dog has made its way in our area. If one can appear under the mountain, than others can too. Shoot…” She’s grumbling more. “I was really hoping this time that a human was here… then the Royal Guard would finally have a meaningful hunt.”

“RIGHT!! A HUMAN HUNT WOULD BE SO MUCH FUN!!”

“*Good eye, Sans.” Undyne remarks, although she sounds barely meaningful at all. “Keep a look out, the both of you, and let me know if you see anything else suspicious.”

“*sure thing, undyne… never knew i could have a good eye with a lack of eyes.”

Both Undyne and Papyrus make discussed noises towards Sans’ awful joke. You would have too if your life didn’t depend so much on staying hidden.

“*Oh, and that fellow I saw playing music with Lesser Dog… they dropped their instrument. Any idea where they went?”

You gasp, looking down in your empty hands. _Fuck... FUCK!! How did you not noticed you dropped it?_

"AH, LOOK AT THAT... WELL I HAVE NO IDEA WHO'S THAT IS OR WHERE THEY COULD HAVE POSSIBLY GONE… B-BUT DON’T WORRY ABOUT IT, UNDYNE... I CAN TAKE CARE OF BRINGING IT BACK TO LESSER DOG AT THE LEAST!”

"Thanks, punk! Oh and if you see the owner, tell them to hook me up if they'd be interested in a music sess... They're decent at playing from what I could hear, though they left before I could catch up to them."

"UH-OF COURSE!! NO PROBLEMO!"

There came some awkward shuffling in the snow and the clanking of Undyne's heavy boots indicating that she was walking away. You remained frigid in your hiding spot, too paranoid to check if she was out of sight.

A boney hand rested on top of your head and you practically jumped out of your skin. That high pitched squeak would have totally given you away if Undyne was still nearby.

”*all clear, pal."

"Jesus fuck..." You whimper, recovering your senses. "That was close..."

"I HEARD THAT!!" Papyrus declared as he leaned over the front of the station to shoot you a glare. "AND DON’T THINK I WONT FORGET THAT LATER, YOU OWE A COIN TO THE SWEAR GOD!!"

"Fine, whatever, but can ya really blame me?? That was terrifying... Glad my gut wasn't wrong, and I got a head start..."

"QUITE RIGHT!! THAT WAS TOO CLOSE!! AND NEXT TIME, CAREFUL WITH YOUR TRUMPET!" He handed the brass instrument down to you. "YOU CAN COME OUT NOW, SHE'S GONE..."

You were hesitant at first; hiding out of sight still felt much safer after that scare. But you gratefully took your horn from Papyrus and crawled out slowly, glancing around to be absolutely sure.

"SANS, THAT WAS QUICK THINKING ABOUT THE LARGE ANNOYING DOG!! SHE SEEMED TO BELIEVE YOU COMPLETELY... UNLESS... IS THERE ACTUALLY ANOTHER ONE???”

"*nope." he flashed his brother a proud smile. "*guess i'm more clever with my words... at least my tongue can keep up."

Papyrus completely missed the joke out of context... But _you_ sure got it and made sure to burn flustered glares into the side of his skull... Which he completely ignored or didn't notice...

"TONGUE?? WHAT TONGUE???" Papyrus asked. That only confused you more... So do skeleton monsters usually not have them...?

“Um… well… I think I’ll head back to the house…. could use a lay down after that excitement.” You mumble, your voice a bit strained.

“HUMAN, I WILL ACCOMPANY YOU TO MAKE SURE IT IS SAFE!! AND SANS!!” Papyrus slammed his gloved fist down on the counter of the station, snapping Sans out of his sudden slumber. “STAY AWAKE!! YOU ARE AT YOUR JOB, FOR GOODNESS SAKES!!”

Sans merely shrugged and gave a lazy grin. Papyrus huffed rather irritably in his direction before he began to escort you back to Snowdin.

You two didn’t really talk much, but you were fine with that. Your brain wasn’t quite in the chatty mood. So you just trudged through the winter wonderland, picking more flakes of snow out from inside the trumpet’s valves. You softly apologized over and over to it that you had accidentally left it behind, and that it wouldn’t happen again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is named after the song 'The World's A Mess, It's In My Kiss' by X.


	18. Let's Go To Bed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Not quite a home run yet...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good evening....  
> Sorry for such a long pause in updates. I've been working on many other forms of storytelling and art, plus my new job has me swamped. But here you go: a nice, long, juicy chapter. More to still cum, huehuehue.
> 
> PS. Sorry this chapter is a bit clumsy. You can maybe tell I haven't 100% perfected smut, especially awkward fumbly smut.

Closing up shop at Grillby’s tonight went by smoothly. To your relief, there wasn’t any dog fur stuffed or tucked away in between the tables, booths or chairs… It was a rather easy clean up, if you do say so yourself. Drunk Bun even managed to leave their usually spot before closing hours.

You tucked the broom and dust pan in it’s back corner of the bar, and take a moment to wipe the sweat from your brow. The pub sure was always toasty… the fire monster that ran it made sure of that.

“Anything else you need done, boss?”

Grillby nearly shook his head. Since you’ve worked there for long enough, this was a clear sign of official dismiss for the night.

“Thanks.” You flash him a grin, and gather your hooded coat and tip earnings for the night.

Tonight was a jam session night… and it had been three days since you and Sans had that new and interesting experience…

You’d be lying if you didn’t admit you were nervous and anxious. You didn’t quite know what to expect…

The last two times you had the opportunity to be with Sans alone, he had abruptly brushed you off and vanished. The first time it happened, you had assumed he was embarrassed or feeling shy to talking with you one on one, but after the second time… felt more like his usual playing hard to get, the fucking lil asshole. The conversation went something along the lines of:

_‘*hey pal. what? got something important to ask? sorry, but i gotta run. duty calls.’_

…Followed by a wink and a teleport outta there. And, fucking please, like his work was ever that important that it couldn’t wait five minutes.

You grumbled irritably. You wish he would just say if he changed his mind about wanting to fool around more or if he was just having fun fucking with you.

Nevertheless, all day at work you couldn’t help playing scenarios in your head of how the one on one music practice would go tonight… In one case, the moment Papyrus was away, Sans would jump you and proceed into another furious make out sesh. But the more you thought about it…. seemed a bit out of character for him. Perhaps that is just a hopeful thought (or desperation) of your own.

“Fuck…” You mumbled. Were your desires really out weighing your fears that much now? You shook your head furiously as you shuffled through the snow towards the skeleton house. This back and forth between sexual tension and annoyance with the lazybones was gonna pop a blood vessel or fucking something.

Another thought kept crossing your mind every now and then too… If he did bring it up and invite you for another go, you were fucking dreading how to respond. You really wanted to… but… something was still holding you back a bit. And surprisingly, it wasn’t the phobia (at least you didn’t think). Part of you was a bit scared to get too close to anyone down here. The last thing you needed was something to tie you down to this place. It was already going to be nearly impossible enough to escape the Underground…

“C’mon, just think of the positive out come though…” You whispered to yourself. Because to be honest… in the moment, could you really refuse a good tongue wrestle?

You cocked your head to the thought of it and couldn’t resist to let a lil’ grin show. _Heh heh… That’s more like it. Smile, you idiot._

The festive lights that wrapped around every inch of the house greeted you cheerfully as you approached the front door. You thought you caught a whiff of Papyrus’ cooking even before you stepped inside.

As the door opened, you were bombarded by shrill shouting and bantering. Papyrus, it seemed, was pissy with his brother (as usual).

“SANS, WHY DO YOU INSIST ON LEAVING YOUR DIRTY SOCKS NEXT TO THE TELEVISION???”

You slink by, not even making eye contact with either of them so you could fetch yourself some water from the kitchen.

“*you asked me to.”

“I DID NOT!! MY NOTE SPECIFICALLY ASKED YOU TO MOVE IT!”

You glance back to see the two skeletons fussing over a pair of greying socks on the carpet floor. Papyrus was fuming and Sans had the smuggest, asshole look you’ve ever seen. You frowned… mostly because the look excited you more than bothered you at the moment.

“*i did move it.”

“YEAH, A WHOLE INCH!! I WANTED YOU TO MOVE THEM UP TO YOUR ROOM!!”

“*i did that too.”

“AND TO NOT BRING THEM BACK DOWN!!”

“*oh… then why didn’t you say so?” Sans shrugged with a cheeky smile up at his brother. _What an fucker…_ and yet you were grinning at him all the same.

You tear your eyes away to fetch a cup from the cabinets. With one practiced swoop, you hop up on the counter top to access the sink.

“HUMAN!” Papyrus had now given up on his brother’s bullshit and stood before you in the kitchen entrance. “WHY MUST YOU KEEP STANDING ON THE KITCHEN COUNTER WITH YOUR BOOTS ON??”

“Oops, my bad, Papyrus…” You grumble guiltily. You had hoped he wouldn’t have caught you, because let’s face it… he would never have noticed the difference.

He let out a dramatic sigh, with his arm extended over his face. Such a drama queen… “IT IS FINE, MY DEAR FRIEND.” He seemed to regain his composure. “OH, AND IF YOU ARE HUNGRY, I HAVE DINNER MADE!! SANS AND I HAVE ALREADY EATEN, SO HELP YOURSELF!!”

“Thanks, dude.” You didn’t know how much of it you’d actually eat. Lately, Papyrus has been experimenting even more with new food ever since you’ve shown him a few of your own cooking recipes and so the meals have become less appetizing. Besides, you think you had a left over burg from Grillby’s in the fridge.

As you hopped down, Papyrus came over next to you to start furiously scrubbing the counter top with a rag. You take a look over at the pots full of dinner on the stove…. It looked like some sort of brown mush… and it smelled… _whoof_ … couldn’t quite express it. But you’d give it a shot to please him.

As you start to help yourself with the smallest portion possible, Sans waltzes into the kitchen. “*sup, bucko. still down for some music after you eat?”

“You bet.” You grin widely at him. _Shit,_ why were you grinning so much like a _fucking doofess?_ Chill out, or he’ll actually hear how loud your goddamn heart beat is right now.

Sans smiled back, tucking his fists into the front pockets on his hoodie. “*sweet. i’ll just wait in the other room.”

He wondered off, leaving you wondering if he was thinking what you were thinking…

“COULD I JOIN AGAIN THIS TIME?? UNDYNE CANCELLED ON MY ROYAL GUARD TRAINING TODAY… AND I WOULD LIKE TO PLAY MORE OF THE AMAZING SAXOPHONE!!”

 _Welp…_ “Uh… yeah of course, man. Why not?”

“WHOOPIE!!”

Papyrus bounded out of the room after his brother and left you standing in the kitchen, fidgeting and wondering how this would play out…

 

…

 

Jamming didn’t go smoothly at all… in fact, it went as smoothly as face scraping concrete. Papyrus had not been practicing nearly as much as Sans, and so he stumbled on notes, didn’t keep up with the time signature, and continuously made awful squeaks and shrieks on the Saxaphone’s reed.

So honestly, it wasn’t a weird, awkward tension between you and Sans with Papyrus looming in the middle… but rather an obnoxious drag. You tried so hard to be patient with the taller skeleton, because you could tell he _really_ wanted to make music with you guys, but his skill was lacking significantly which held you and Sans back.

“S-SORRY! I THINK I GOT IT THIS TIME!” Papyrus declares, after the fifth fuck-up.

“*s’ok, bro.”

Sans was, as expected, incredibly patient with his brother. Guess you just get to that point when living with someone for so long. You longed for that kinda patience right now, because it was becoming harder and harder to hide the irritable twitch in your lower eye lid. You just wanted to play some fucking music… And deep down, you really wanted the music session to be over, not just because you wantied to talk shit out with Sans, but because all desire to play music tonight was dead.

“I’M SORRY, HUMAN… I THINK I GOT IT FOR SURE NOW!”

You only nod, and then grit your teeth as another loud squeak from his instrument fills the space.

“OH DRAT!!” He exclaims. “WHO AM I KIDDING?? I CAN’T PLAY THIS SILLY THING… I HAVEN’T BEEN PRACTICING WITH YOU GUYS. I’M JUST MAKING THIS BORING FOR THE TWO OF YOU.”

 _Well, he wasn’t wrong._ But when he said it like that, it made you feel pretty bad.

“*nah, it’s really ok, bro.” Sans gave him a pat on the shoulder.

“NO, SANS… I CAN’T KEEP UP WITH YOU GUYS. I SPENT MOST OF THE TIME TRAINING WITH UNDYNE WHILE YOU GUYS PRACTICED ON YOUR OWN. SO I’M WAY BEHIND. I CAN’T CATCH UP NOW…”

“Sure you can.” You say simply. “You just need to practice more on your own time if you can’t always make it to our jam sessions.”

Papyrus stubbornly shook his head. “PLEASE, YOU TWO. I WANTED THIS TO BE A THING I COULD BE A PART OF AND TO ALSO TRAIN TO BECOME A ROYAL GUARD. BUT THEY BOTH TAKE A LOT OF TIME! I HAVE TO CHOOSE ONE AND FOCUS ON IT, OTHERWISE I WON’T BE AS GOOD!! MY WORK ETHIC WILL SUFFER!!”

You were a bit moved by his mature speech.

“SORRY HUMAN, SANS… I GUESS I SPOILED THIS PRACTICE WITH MY TOM-FOOLERY. I THINK I UNDERSTAND NOW, I SHOULD STICK WITH MY TRAINING WITH UNDYNE SINCE THAT IS MORE IMPORTANT TO ME.” Papyrus stood up and set the Saxophone down on the ground next to his chair.

“*papyrus?” Sans asked, concern etched on his skull.

“THANKS FOR HUMORING ME, YOU TWO…” With that, Papyrus walked out and up the stairs to his own room.

 _Damn…_ you had never heard Papyrus sound so sad and defeated. Now you felt like a total ass for being annoyed with him a moment ago.

Sans also stood and sighed. “*hang on, i’ll be right back.” And he followed his brother up to his room.

You sat there a moment in silence, awkwardly fingering the keys on your trumpet. A few minutes had passed and Sans was still up there, probably talking with his brother. You could faintly hear their voices every now and then floating down to you. You felt it was safe to assume that music practice was done tonight, so you stood up and started to clean out the horn. Then you put it, the sax and the trombone away in their individual cases. Once that was done, you glanced back up at Papyrus’ door, hoping for a sign on how much longer Sans would be up there. _More waiting then…_

You moved to sitting on the couch, finally letting out an annoyed sigh. Well… today was a lot less exciting then anticipated. And… disappointing. You spent all fucking day worrying about how awkward or bad, or nerve racking things would get only to lead up to some potential score, but no… it all seemed to have teetered out to-

“*sorry about papyrus.”

You sat up quickly, wide eyed. If you didn’t know better, you probably looked like you were caught guilty of something or another. You kinda were, here you were being selfish and thinking of your own needs, while Papyrus was feeling like shit.

“Oh! Uh… don’t worry about it. It’s fine.”

Sans nodded and looked up the stairs where his brother must be, sulking in his bedroom.

“Is he… uh, gonna be okay?”

“*oh sure. he gets like this now and then, but he’ll be his good ol’ self tomorrow.”

There was a pause. You didn’t know how to continue after it. Luckily, he proceeds on anyway:

“*you know, i think he’s just jealous. he wants to be apart of this thing that i have finally found motivation for.”

“What do you mean, the music sessions?”

“*sure. well, kinda.” Sans’ eye sockets close as he takes in a deep breath. “*it’s not that he wants to actually play music with us, but that he just wants to be involved in my new activity. for a while, he couldn’t get me to do anything… he barely could get me to do my jobs, as you’ve already seen. but now i have this hobby. and he’s excited for me that i have it. and he just wants to experience it with me in any way he can. so i think he felt upset tonight because he thinks he was ruining it for me by being there.”

“Uh… well, was he?”

“*’corse not. sure, we didn’t get to really practice that new song, but having him try so hard was all i needed.”

You grin up at him. Damn, the lazybones was an ass to most, but he sure did love his brother. You could appreciate that. And then you felt the heartache and your smile began to falter.

“Well… I’m glad you still had fun. But I think it’s a bit late to play anymore…” You trail off, baiting him out to see if he’ll bring up _anything_ … _anything at all._

Sans looks back at you for a moment but doesn’t say another word. He just wears that usual, hard-to-read grin of his. You think he isn’t going to go for it… so with a sigh, you stand up from the couch and make your way to the door to retire for the night.

“*hey.”

Your body freezes but your heart bursts to life.

“*i’m sorry if music practice wasn’t as fun for you. next time papyrus will be with undyne for his royal guard training, so you won’t have to worry about it being unproductive.”

“It’s cool.”

You stand there a little longer, hoping he has more to say… but he doesn’t.

“Well, I guess goodnight then…?”

“*yeah. ‘night.”

And he’s gone in a blink of an eye.

 

…

 

You lay on your grimy mattress, trying to fall asleep… but you are no where near tired. _Fucking shit…_ If you weren’t originally pent up with hormones and an itch to satisfy, you _definitely_ were now.

You role onto your back, cursing frustratedly and squeezing your eyes as shut as possible.

_‘Corse he didn’t say anything… the fucking asshole… Why couldn’t he have brought it up?_

_Why the fuck didn’t you bring it up then?_

You grumble loudly, as if that would scare away the strange desires crawling all over your skin. _What to do now… what to do now…_

You could maybe just play with yourself… force down your pride, and rub one off. Just as you are reaching down over your sensitive skin, the courage shoots through you. No… you wanted more than this. You wanted the adrenaline of feeling someone else touch you. So, you needed to be up front and goddamn ask for it then. No more playing hard to get, you were sick of the bullshit anyway. You’d go back in there and ask Sans if he wanted another go. _But then again…_

It had only been about 20-30 minutes since you had left the main house. And yet the dude could have already passed the fuck out, knowing him.

“Just fucking try, alright?” You told yourself, as you flung out of bed and started to put your warmer clothes back on. You tucked your pant legs down into your boots and bundled up tight for the brief passing through the snowy air.

You were thankful the skeletons didn’t lock up their house after going to bed. Seems the town was just small enough that if someone were to get robbed, no one could get away with the crime. So you let yourself in, quickly remove your boots and jacket and started to creep up the stairs quietly. You had to pass Papyrus’ room first, and you would much rather not disturb him. You hoped so badly he was already sound asleep.

You approached Sans door, holding fast to this sudden rush of bravery. You gave a small rap upon the wood and waited a moment.

Nothing…

You frowned. Damn, maybe he really did fall asleep already?

You gave a louder knock.

…And still nothing.

You’re about to give up, because the thought just crossed you that Sans has never actually been in his room when you’ve come looking for him there… what if the guy went out again, because he can’t sleep? You had been convinced he was an insomniac too-

The door opens barely. You can faintly see the glow from Sans’ eye peering out at you. You feel the shivers run up and down your arms and back.

“*sup?” He sounds kinda tired.

“Uh, I didn’t wake you did I?” _Stop it, you lil’ shit, don’t stall; just ask._

“*heh sorta.” He replies simply.

“I guess it can wait till tomorrow…” _Goddamnit, were you really chickening out now?_

“*nah, what’s up?”

You hesitate, but you don’t back down.

“I wanna have another go.”

“*right now? thought it was too late to jam anymore.”

“No, that’s not what I meant…”

His pupils narrowed. Now he understood.

“*oh.”

You couldn’t tell if that was a positive response or not. But you stand your ground, ignoring the beads of sweat forming on your palms.

There’s a moment where he chuckles a bit to himself and leers up at you keenly before he responds again.

“*guess you got tired of my game of cat and mouse, huh, buddy?”

This time your eyes narrow. So he _was_ being a lil shit and avoiding you for fun.

“Fucking really?!” You hiss under your breath. “Why?”

He shrugs. “*i get bored easily… and besides, i didn’t want to rush into the fun all at once. sometime it’s more enjoyable to ease into new shit, ya know?”

 _Oh…_ you bite down a bit on your lip that was starting to tremble. You knew Sans was starting to be more serious when he started to curse.

“Yeah well…” You try to puff out your chest to remain firm and tough. “Bit harsh, don’t you think?”

_Alright, that was a lame come back… but whatever._

“*my bad…” He leans back more and opens the door a bit wider now; an act of invitation. “*care to come in then?”

Well here you go… You waltz in, barely able to make any of the walls out. The moment Sans closes the door behind you, it’s practically pitch black. All you can see are his pupils glowing faintly in the dark.

“How do you see anything in here?” You ask, feeling a bit more nervous now that you were in foreign territory with your sight completely useless.

“*it’s fine. what, you can’t see?” His tone sounds cheeky.

“No, actually, I can’t.” You respond, a bit bitey. _Yeah sure, rub it in that human anatomy has its down sides verses a monster’s._

“*sorry, i’d offer to turn on a light, but the flashlight has been out of batteries for a while…”

 _The flashlight?_ An interesting choice of lighting for a room… you briefly wondered what else was in here.

You felt Sans bump up against you. You flinched a bit, not expecting it.

“*here, buddy. come over here.” His boney hands gently grabbed a hold of your arm and he guided you over to another part of the room. “*heh, you really are blind in here, huh?”

“Yeah…” You sigh. But, on that thought…

 _“_ *perhaps that works in your favor then?”

He had the same thought as you. Since you couldn’t see his physical appearance looking like a skeleton, you wouldn’t have to worry about the phobia getting in the way. Plus the thought of being vulnerable to your partner was… _very exciting_. A grin forms on your lips

“*well? you ready?”

You nod, glad that he could still see you.

Instantly his hands are off of your wrist and around your middle. He’s come in for a rather aggressive kiss, but you accept it gratefully. You had been aching for it for a while now anyway.

His claw like fingers find their way under your clothes and explored your skin. His touch was rather curious as he poked and stroked each new area, soaking in the new sensations of human flesh. You didn’t mind. It felt nice to have such focused attention on your body. It was very flattering.

And his taste… sweeter this time. He must have eaten something just before retiring for the night.

You suddenly let out a surprised sigh as his fingers had found your sensitive nipples. He, too, let’s out an excited sound, pausing from tonguing with you to(you assumed) just watching your reaction. His fingers played with your breasts lightly at first. The more you squirmed with delight, the more he experiment using more force. It was a rather intense feeling… Fuck, it felt good too. But you tried your best to keep your cries soft, fearing that you would awaken Papyrus.

Sans leaned in close and began to gnaw softly on your neck and shoulder, as his motions around your nipples got faster. You shake and quiver more, your legs instinctly wrapping around his and your arms now hugging him tight for support. The longer he went, the weaker your legs felt under you. So you held onto him for support as you road out the intense experience.

He suddenly stopped. You gasped for a second, still clinging around his boney neck, a bit surprised and disappointed…

“*hope that wasn’t too much. sorry, got too into it again… don’t wanna rush things.”

“y-yeah…” You pant in agreement, although still a bit bummed that he stopped too quickly. This just shows the dude was an amateur with intimate experience. But you couldn’t grade him too hard, you were still a new toy for him to get use to.

“*sounds like you enjoy that.”

“It’s, uh… a rather sensitive area.”

“*noted.”

Sans begins to move you over more, where he eases on onto his bed. You stumble a bit clumsily, unable to see. He seems to hover next to you for a moment, his pupils blinking in and out in the dark.

“*comfortable?” he whispers near your ear.

“Yeah.” You whisper back. You feel a bit self-conscious how close you are to him with your arms still wrapped around his neck. The feeling doesn’t last long; Sans’ hands are all over you again. His touch is firm and he pushes you to lean back on the bed as he begins to explore you again. Though you found his way of forward play a bit awkward and different, you played along perfectly. Of course it was gonna be awkward. How many other humans and monsters fucked around?

“*show me where else it feels good.” He says simply.

You reach for his hands and move them down to your pelvis. You fumble to guide his fingers under your jeans, a few times his pointy fingers snaring and catching on the fabric. Finally, his hands are under your shorts, brushing up against your soft lips. It could have just been your imagination, but you think you saw his grin in the dark.

“*there?” He asks, barely touching you after you pull away from his grip.

“Y-yes!” You exclaim, a bit exasperated. You are sure he’s still toying with you, even to this point. It made you a bit frustrated, but more so desperate. His touch was barely there… you wanted him to press down… to rub you and feel you and-

 _“Ahh!”_ You bite down on your lip as a cry escapes you. His hard, boney finger just happened to rub firmly against your clit. Even though you had guided him close to it, it still surprised you how quickly he managed to hit that nail on the head.

“*yeah definitely there…” He breathes hard, sounding very excited. He’s enjoying this a lot. He strokes you again and again. This time, you’re ready for it and you arch your lower back against him. _Ah, yes… God, yes…_ This was what you’ve been craving. It had been too long since you’ve felt like this.

“Haahhh… I’m… nn-close…” You gasp, rocking against him.

“*close?” He asks, sounding intrigued.

His speed picked up, and you swore you could see stars.

_“FUCK, Ahhh!”_

It was a bit louder than you expected. Your moan definitely carried quite far out of the room. The moment you reached climax, Sans had stopped. You couldn’t see his face so you weren’t sure what his expression was, either shock or pride.

“*…what was that?”

“I…” You’re still gasping, as well as listening for any stirring in the house.

God, you really hope you didn’t wake up Papyrus.

“I came…” Is all you can manage to say, feeling light headed.

You were always rather sensitive, more so than most. You weren’t too proud of it, because it meant you couldn’t last as long in the heat of things. You usually needed a few minutes before continuing again if your partner hadn’t gotten off yet.

“*what does that mean?” Sans asked, almost in a whisper. He must be listening for his brother too.

“You don’t…. do monsters not orgasm?”

“*not that I know of…”

You felt kinda bad. You hoped that was truly the case, and not that Sans had never been able to experience such a feeling for himself.

The two of you waited in silence for a moment, both listening to see if Papyrus was awake at all. Time passed a bit, and the house seemed still.

“It’s… just a climax of intense pleasure.”

“*i see.”

“Speaking of…” You grope around in the dark, trying to find Sans middle. You find what feels like his sternum. He shifts a bit under your touch. “Where do you feel good?”

Now you were the one awkwardly asking the questions. But it made sense now that you were on the opposite end trying to communicate such a thing. It really was just easier to ask than to try and figure out his goddam anatomy.

“*don’t worry about it right now…” Sans mutters.

“What? That hardly seems fair…” You grumble.

“*we were a bit loud just then… probably need to hold off for now. i’m sure we woke up papyrus but he’s not going to say anything about it until tomorrow morning, i’m sure of it. so we’ll just have to…” He pauses, sounding a bit disappointed. “*try again some more when he’s not in the house.”

“When will that be?” You ask. You curse yourself for sounding so goddamn eager.

“*probably best around when he goes to train with undyne. that’ll give us an hour or two.”

“Okay…”

Damn, that lasted a lot shorter than you hoped. You did get off, but you felt like an ass not returning the favor.

Sans made a sound, much like a yawn. It was contagious enough to trigger you into a sleepy yawn yourself.

“Well, I should probably get ready for bed then…” You say.

“*sure… um… if you don’t want to deal with trudging through the cold again…” Sans pauses awkwardly. You think you can see him shifting about, adjusting the linens on the bed. “*you could stay here for tonight…”

“You mean in here with you?” You ask, a bit taken aback.

“*yeah…”

 _Shit._ This was what you were kinda afraid of. Getting attached. And now you were worried it was on his end too. But… damn, the offer was tempting at least to save the trip through the cold. You felt extra tired after sweet relief. Plus, you would feel even more awkward if you declined it.

“Sure, thanks man.”

You shift around in the dark, removing your socks and long sleeve shirt, just keeping your jeans and tank top on. Usually you slept in just your underwear, but you didn’t quite feel comfortable doing that with the lazybones. Oh well, it’s just one night. Sans shifts next to you and gets comfortable on his mattress. You settle down next to him. You feel his shoulder against yours. You are both very quiet and don’t move another inch. _Fuck… now it really felt weird._

“*well, good night, then.” he says simply.

“Yeah… good night…”

You remain laying on your back, not wanting to move. Luckily his bed is big enough that you both have enough space each. Usually you slept on your side, but you didn’t want to turn away from him, nor did you want to be turned toward him. Maybe you should have just gone back to the shed… Too fucking late now.

_Maybe you’ll just wait till he falls asleep… shouldn’t be long…_

As you lay there, counting sheep and listening for a sign that Sans had finally drifted off, you feel your own consciousness slipping away. You feel how comfortable and soft the bed is under you. How much warmer it is in this house, than in that drafty shed. How much you didn’t give a fuck and that you just… wanted… to go…… to bed………….

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is based on the song 'Let's Go To Bed' by The Cure.


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